Finding Home
by FirstYear
Summary: She fought the final battle,there was one more thing she couldn't tell anyone. Now she has to overcome her fears, learn trust,accept help with a secret she is compelled to keep. Marriage Law with a twist *Sequel* Home Again, Home Again, Jiggery-Jig
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 1**

* * *

Severus held his cane tightly as he made his way down the corridors to the potions classroom. He was thankful now that Minerva had insisted he use the room closer to his chamber and refigured the castle to accommodate him. He stopped and leaned his free hand against the wall, panting in exhaustion, and looked up to see the door still a good thirty meters away.

_Fuck_, he thought, _Longbottom's grandmother does better._

"Professor?" He recognized the voice at once and sighed. He had hoped to make it into the classroom and be sitting before she arrived.

"Miss Granger." He greeted her in as steady a voice as he could. "I had heard you were returning to re-do your Seventh Year. Most commendable, albeit highly unnecessary."

"I found I had nothing else to do," she said, laughing lightly. "My parents are gone, for all intents, and there are no jobs to be had until the post war rebuilding can be done, so I was at a loss. This seemed the only option."

"I am sure you can still break my wards. If you care to go in I shall be there shortly."

"Thank you, Professor."

He looked up, and watched as she hurried to the classroom and with a couple of passes of her wand pushed the door open, and disappeared from sight. He was surprised and thankful she had not insisted on helping him. She appeared to have aged more then only the one year since he had last seen her. Running his hand through his hair, he smirked. He was sure he had more grey then last year and looked worse for wear as well. The war seemed to have taken its toll in more ways then one.

He took a deep breath and pushed off the wall to resume his slow three-legged walk down the hall. By the time he had reached the door his arm was shaking from holding onto the cane so tightly and he was again gasping for air. He paused to see where she was sitting before beginning his slow climb down the stairs, making sure he did not pass too close to her.

She waited until he had sat and his breathing evened out. "Professor, if I may? I could have the custodian change the middle walk to a ramp. It would make it easier."

"I am in no need of your suggestions, Miss Granger." He looked around the room and wordlessly turned off all but one candle.

"It is not just you. There is a sixth year missing a leg, and two more, I don't know the years, one had her foot crushed and the other is still recovering from a broken pelvis." Hermione looked at him evenly. "Sir? The lights, sir."

"Harold, Harold Johnson. He lost his leg when the south wall fell. Not all Slytherins ran from the final battle, Miss Granger. It is Brenda McMaster with the crushed foot, also of my house." Severus sighed deeply and looked at her. "The other is a Ravenclaw. He broke his pelvis on a motor cycle. He wanted to see how fast he could go. I have always thought he was wrongly sorted."

Hermione smiled thinly at him. "It does sound more like something a Gryffindor would do, now that you mention it."

He saw her uneasy smile and nodded. "Filch is still with us. You may contact him after class if you think they would benefit."

"You also should use a different type of walking stick … there are easier ones to hold."

"Miss Granger, I am sure you know so much more than the medical staff…"

"Don't start with me again, Professor," she said flatly. "I lost my patience a few months back and have not even bothered to look for it."

"Then don't start with _me, _Miss Granger. Why are you here? You received your certificate of completion. You were also offered no less than three jobs. I myself supplied the recommendations. So, Miss Granger, do not sit there and pretend different and lie to me."

"Fine." She stood and began cramming her books back in her knapsack. "I don't need potions. I don't need your class or your caustic, sarcastic, black hearted attitude."

Severus raised his hand and wandlessly closed and warded the door. "I asked you a question, Miss Granger, I expect an answer."

Hermione snapped her head up and watched as the door locked and then turned to Severus seething. "How dare you?"

"Very easily thank you. Now, answer the question. Why are you here?"

"I told you," she said looking back at the door.

"Miss Granger?"

"Open the door. Snape," she hissed at him. "Open it now."

"A little door Miss Granger? I am sure you could open it yourself. You have once already."

"I hate you, everyone hates you." She glared at him as tears began to fill her eyes.

"Good, they will not stay after class to ask foolish questions. Answer me, Miss Granger."

"It is not your…"

"Oh but it is. As your teacher, I find it most useful to know what motivates students. Tell me, Hermione, what is it that motivates you to return this year?"

She turned to the door and lifted her wand in her trembling hand. Unable to hold the wand still enough to cast the spell she let her arm drop to her side.

Severus stood to walk over to her, took one step and returned to his seat unable to make the short walk. "Miss Granger, I am too old for this, and too sore to carry on this farce. Tell me why you are here or this is where you will take your lunch and perhaps your dinner. Bloody hell, girl, I personally don't care if you spend the night here."

"Headmistress said I could return this year." She lifted her chin and glowered at him.

She stood and watched him, flicking her eyes to the door as she felt her lungs begin to suck in shorter and shorter breaths. She turned away from the door fully and folded her arms determined not to look again before he raised the wards. She saw him pick up his newspaper and begin to read.

Lesson would start in a few minutes she thought smugly, in just a few minutes, the door would open and the students would begin to file in for the double potions lesson. She kept that thought in the front of her mind as she closed her eyes and let it become her mantra. _A few minutes, a few minutes, a few minutes_, she chanted until she felt her knees hit the floor and her head lower to her chest. She stayed as she was unmoving, as he called to her repeatedly. Finishing his paper, he stood and called her again.

"Please let me go sir, please."

"Miss Granger." He painfully squatted down in front of her and grabbed her chin yanking her head up. "I can do nothing for you unless you say it out loud. Now, why are you here?"

"So he won't get me again. Please sir, don't let him at me." He felt chilled at the terror behind the words that he saw in her face and the effect they had on her. Her eyes were large and tearful and the way she looked at him was as if she were drowning.

"Say it Miss Granger. Why are you…?"

"He said it was my fault. He said he would make sure I paid," she whispered, leaning into his ear and fisting his robe to bring him close. "He said next time he would kill me and then find my parents. He said…"

"His name, Miss Granger, you have to say his name."

"For two days he kept the doors locked. I couldn't get out. For two days he…"

"I know Miss Granger, but it has to be you that presses the charges. You have to say it."

"Lucius, Lucius Malfoy," she screamed the name as she fell forward into his lap sobbing.

He raised his hand and unlocked the door allowing Minerva to sweep in with a billow of green flowing robes. She hurried to the sobbing girl pulling her off Severus and onto her own shoulder.

"My Merlin, Severus, I thought she would never give up. You have been in here almost three hours with her."

"Make sure it is Kingsley she talks to. I still do not trust the rest." Severus tried to stand only to sink back down on the floor. "I am afraid I require assistance."

"Poppy is on her way. I sent her for more of your potion when it was taking so long." Minerva stroked the still sobbing girl. "She is bringing Hermione a calming potion as well."

"No, you will give her nothing. That is her problem. She has never dealt with the war or Malfoy's treatment of her this past summer. She needs to accept it and deal with it without the potion's help. She must grieve and be over it. Now help me up woman."

"Allow me," Kingsley Shacklebolt said from the doorway. "It is not everyday that I am in the position to see Severus Snape on the floor."

He strode up to Severus and reached out his hand grinning at the Potions Master.

"If I had enough strength to pull myself up I could use the chair," he hissed.

Kingsley looked at Minerva with a raised eyebrow. Seeing her look away, he held his tongue, stood behind Severus, bent over, hooked his arms under Severus' arms, and hoisted him up.

Severus smoothed his robes down and lifted his chin in a feeble attempt to hold onto what little dignity he had left.

"If you will excuse me," he said, reaching for his cane. "I will return to my chambers."

"Severus, perhaps…"

"No Minerva," he said, looking down at Hermione. "I have done what you asked. I am done."

"I will come to you later for your memories." Kingsley scowled at him.

"Fine, just make sure you understand when I do not answer the door or your questions."

Severus slowly began to make his way to his chambers when he heard Poppy's shoes clacking against the stones as she hurried to him.

"Severus, you should have waited." She chided him as she grabbed his arm and slid it around her shoulders. "I told Minerva you were not up to this."

She slowly stepped forward as he slid his right leg slowly, no longer able to lift it. Scowling, she leaned him against the wall as she dug in her pockets for his potion and held it to his mouth until he drank. Taking up his arm again, she helped him into his chambers and to his chair in front of the fireplace.

"Shall I floo for tea?"

"No," he said, raising his arm and calling to the fire whiskey that sat on the mantel.

"Oh no," she said and caught it midway. "Not on top of the potion. If you would only go to St. Mungo's and see a Healer boy, they may be able to help."

"For years they would not help me, now you want me to give them a chance to tout me out in front of the press as a staunch supporter of theirs? I think not."

"Have it your way." She walked over and ran her wand over his body checking his vital signs. "Well, seems like you did no damage. You need to rest. I told you it would take a few more months before you had your strength back."

"We needed to do this. He is getting worse." He sighed and rested his head back on the chair. "Narcissa has left him. She was the only thing that kept him in check, now… I fear if something is not done he will try to start it all over."

"He will not have supporters." Poppy patted his head and reached for another potion, handing it to him and then pulling over a footrest.

"A promise of power and he will have all the supporters he wants." Severus laughed. "Take a walk down to Knockdown, pick a few of the newly homeless due to the war, tell them it is someone else's fault and promise them power and enough food to eat. That is your new army Poppy. Then offer them a few pretty, unspoiled witches or Muggles and you have loyalty."

"Do you really think that is what he wants Hermione for?" She looked at him in shock.

"No, I believe that is what he _wanted_ her for." Severus closed his eyes and began to drift on top of a sea of potions. "The only thing that surprises me is that she survived it intact enough to come back here. She is stronger than I gave her credit of."

Poppy picked up his blanket from the floor and covered him up. Then taking the fire whiskey with her she left him sleeping and went to check again on Hermione.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 2**

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Severus woke before the sun rose and looked at once to the table next to the chair for his potion. Seeing it waiting for him, he relaxed and let his body sink back into the comfort of the wingback chair. At one time, he held a fear of the Dark Lord and Revels, midnight raids and being forced to do the unspeakable acts of a wizard war. Now, he felt reduced to cold quivering fear that went to his soul if his potion was slow in coming.

Each morning he tried to go longer before reaching for the thick liquid and letting it slide down his throat bringing hopes and dreams, he could not stop from invading his mind as the portion took him away to places he would rather not go. Disappointment and betrayal he understood, wanting more was for children on Christmas morning as they waited for a miracle that would never happen, and if it appeared it had, was only a lie.

He slowly began the process that would allow him to rise from his chair. First stretching his arms and legs, then arching his back and rotating his head. He listened to the sound of china grating at the base of his skull. _Shite_, he thought, _another bad day, _as he lifted his head to a pounding ache.

He gauged his days now by how hard it was to rise and start the process of showering and dressing. He could manage alone now and no longer had to wait for Poppy to floo in and help him to the tub, lowering him gently into the water and standing outside the door listening for his cries of distress. She had positioned chairs along his path to give him some place to stop and rest if the short walk from tub to chair was too much. Today, and every day this week he had managed to bypass them and make it all the way to the loo without sitting.

He managed to make it through the shower, dress, and return to his chair, pickup the newspaper that waited for him before his eyes again turned to the potion. He was reaching for the vial as the floo activated and Poppy stepped through.

"How are you doing today?" she asked.

"Better I do believe." He looked up to the hourglass on the mantle and sighed. "I need a different potion Poppy. This one takes the pain but my mind goes with it. I can not live like this."

Poppy reached in her pocket and brought out a new potion she had carried for the past week, waiting for him to admit defeat. "Severus, I know you did not want to contact St. Mungo's, so I did. Now, before you start on one of your rants, I did make them put a privacy clause in the contract to provide this."

"Why a contract?" He narrowed his eyes and glared at her.

"Simple, one of the Potion Masters that helps keep them stocked is no longer producing potions, you arse. They have to buy most of their potions from abroad. I had to promise them we would buy it for at least three more months to make it worth their while."

He snatched the vial, and uncorking it, ran it under his nose, pulling back quickly as the sharp smell came to him. "I want a list of ingredients before I consume that."

She smugly reached in her pocket and brought out the list he had asked for. She had anticipated his arguments when she had ordered the supply.

"They would not give me the instructions, but I did get the list." She handed it to him watching him closely. "Severus, just try it for a few days to see if it helps."

He read the list frowning, looked up at her and lowered his head back to the list.

"Cure or kill," he smirked. "I will need something to stop it from coming back up."

She smiled and handed him a Stomach Settling potion. "I thought that when I read the oil's that were included."

He drank the potion and looked up at Poppy. "I feel the pain slipping and my mind seems clear. It is a foul potion, sharp and acidic."

"Hermione asks for you." She said in an off-handed manner as she gathered up the empty vials. "She is in the hospital wing. I thought it prudent to keep her there while she was learning to live without the potions."

"Has she spoken to Kingsley?" he asked as he attempted to stand and was pleased to see he did not need to clutch the chair arms to do so. "I see no point in her talking to me."

"Ronald has been to see her." Poppy tried to keep the disgust from her voice. "She spends her time consoling him, instead of him her. If he stayed away, I think she would heal faster. He should realize he can not help her to grieve when he can not do it himself."

"Perhaps the other, Potter can talk to her," he said coldly.

"He seems distracted and not able to deal with much himself. Severus, they were three children thrust into what they should have been protected from."

"One common trait of the Dark Lord and the Headmaster," he said with a grimace as he lowered himself back to his chair. "Take them at an early age when they can be moulded into what is needed. Tom preferred the pure bloods, Albus took the rest."

"That is unfair and uncalled for Severus."

"Please do not try to convince me it was only the perfect-three that were victims of this war Poppy. I had a house full of students, now only ten are here."

"Well, that is neither here nor there; nothing can be done to change it." Poppy headed for the floo. "I will have your tray sent down this morning. Tomorrow you should try to make it to the Great Hall for your meals. Soon you will be at your full class load."

"I will make sure the school is reimbursed for the cost of the potion." He leaned back his head in the chair feeling the potion still relaxing his back.

"Minerva insisted that we pay for it." Poppy turned back to him. "I will have your lunch sent to the hospital ward. It will pass the time as you talk to Hermione."

Severus curled his lip and sneered at her. "Tell Minerva…"

"No, Severus, you tell her. She will be tied up until lunch when you can find her with Miss Granger."

"Fine," he glowered at her. "Don't expect much, she will not be ready yet."

Severus watched as she stepped back into the floo and disappeared once again, thinking that once he no longer needed constant help he would block off the floo again. It was surprising how often one of the staff would come in for a visit when it was open, and quite another how very few would make the long walk through the hallways.

He missed his godson's weekly visits to play chess. They had lasted until Lucius had come to collect the boy and to recruit Severus _back into the fold_. Draco had stood with his head lowered, not meeting his godfather's eye in an uncharacteristic stance of fear and loathing. Draco had squirmed, just a tad, as Lucius bragged of his most recent conquests over Muggles and his plans to build an army.

That was when Severus had first spoken to Kingsley. The second time was when the bragging Lucius admitted that Hermione was his next conquest. Kingsley and Arthur Weasley had set up around the clock surveillance but had missed movement in the shadows that Tuesday night when she had gone alone to the Muggle Library. By the time the shadow stepped forward and slipped its black clad arm around Hermione's neck, as the other twisted in her hair to hold her tight, it was too late to stop the apparation that had already begun.

No amount of tracking spells would reveal so much as a whisper of magic. She was gone only to reappear leaving her parents home again Saturday morning as she made her way to the market she shopped for groceries.

They still watched her. They watched as she now walked far from any shadow, keeping her hand in her pocket to touch her wand, her eyes constantly moving from side to side and long bushy hair cut short to her chin in front, shorter in the back, to make it harder to grab and hold and twist. They watched as the movers took her belongings to a storage unit and the new owners took possession of the house. They watched as she stepped aboard the Hogwarts train to return to school before they felt she was safe.

They waited as the bruises on her faded and until the cuts to her lips healed and still they waited for her to report what had happened.

"Just drag the poor girl down to the Ministry," Minerva had yelled. "She is a child, make her tell you."

"If she were a child we could Minerva. She is an adult." Arthur had only shaken his head. "We have tried. I even had Molly happen on her in Diagon a couple to times. The girl just is not talking."

"I am sure Ronald could…" she began.

"He tried, only he believes her when she says she fell while packing up her parent's house." Arthur had run ran his fingers though his hair in abject frustration. "I can't tell him what we suspect until we know more. I am sorry Minerva, but he still visits his brother's grave with Molly every day. Until he can get himself together he is no good for anyone else."

"The law is clear. She must press charges. If she tells someone, then they can file the report for her, but she must sign the report as true," Kingsley had added.

"Well, I will get her to talk. Of that you can be certain." Minerva had raised her chin and looked down her nose at them.

"Be careful Minerva. She is on the edge." Poppy said from her seat in the back of the room where she had sat listening. "Do you know that she keeps her candles lit all night? From the grounds, her window is easily seen at night. She hardly eats and she startles easily."

"Is that not to be expected?" Arthur had looked at her somewhat coldly. "It took us nearly a year to bring Ginny back to herself after her first year here."

"Yes and no Arthur. Hermione smells of calming and sleep potions." Poppy had shrugged. "With the amount of potions she is taking she should not still be so tense."

That is when Minerva thought of her plan to assign Hermione to a non-existent class in the darkest part of the castle, with the wizard most likely to instil fear. She sighed, knowing that it was cruel and unforgivable of her, but she was determined to pull Hermione back from wherever she was hiding. She had instructed Poppy to substitute weaker potions and had set her trap.

Severus rose from his chair and slipped his robes on. He knew Minerva was on her way to the hospital ward already and he was bound to be late. He grabbed a wooden paperweight on his way out thinking he could transfigure it to a chair if he needed. Beginning the long and laborious walk down the hallway, he heard footfalls approaching him. Looking up from his concentration of the uneven flagstone floor, he saw Kingsley walking towards him.

"I do say, Snape, you walk like an old woman."

"At least I walk and not strut as one of Malfoy's peacocks," Severus spat.

"I thought I would come down to see what you plan to do at the stairs." Kingsley stood still with his arms crossed over his chest smirking at Severus.

"You are enjoying this," Severus said. "I knew you had a dark side, you should have met the Dark Lord. You would have enjoyed him."

Severus stopped and looked at Kingsley and then down the long hallway to the stairs. He leaned on his cane and glared back at the tall dark wizard. "Smart arse."

Kingsley put his head back and laughed before stepping up and pulling Severus to his chest and spinning off to the hospital ward in soundless Apparation.

"Minerva lifted the ban." He was still laughing as Severus backed away, a colour actually climbing up his neck.

"You, you… you…" he stuttered. "That was most inappropriate."

"Poppy said you still do not have the strength on your own." Kingsley tried to swallow his laughter. "I was not hugging you, I was merely assisting you."

"That I have heard from many a whore in Knockturn …"

"Severus, do be still." Minerva rolled her eyes as she hurried over. "Term has started. Children may overhear. Now come, I have lunch ready."

Kingsley nodded and walked quietly to stand just outside the curtain, where he could overhear with out being seen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 3**

* * *

Hermione sat at the edge of the bed, a table and two more chairs pushed up to her. She glared at Severus as he entered the curtained area and turned her head away from him.

"You said a friend, Professor McGonagall. You said nothing about him," she said with obvious disgust.

"He is a friend of mine child."

"I am not a child."

"Then stop acting like one," Severus said as he sat heavily in one of the chairs and closed his eyes against the sharp pain that shot through him. "You could have made this easier if you had not waited so long."

"What I did is none of your business," she spat at him.

"Wrong again Miss Granger," he said, opening his eyes. He turned to the table and sat up as straight as he could. "I know the two of you were not alone. Whoever he was… let us say for now, whoever Lucius was _favouring_ with your presence, is to be with him when he makes his own bid for power. You were part of his payment."

She looked down at her lap and pressed her lips together. "I don't know who it was. They … they were careful not to let me see him. There was a blindfold and when he… whenever he was in the … in the room… whenever…"

"I believe the word is dungeon, Miss Granger. They took you to Malfoy Manor and kept you in the dungeon. Did they not?"

Hermione nodded and took a gulp of air. "I recognized it from before, during the war. It was worse this time."

"Tell me Miss Granger, something I am curious about. We know that Narcissa has left, we assume for France, or Northern Italy, was she still there at the time you were?"

Hermione squeezed her eyes closed and nodded her head again. "She brought me a potion."

"A pain potion?" Minerva puzzled. "How unlike what I would expect of her."

"I doubt it was for pain." Severus watched Hermione carefully and saw her flinch. "I would guess it more likely that she does not want any more heirs to the Malfoy fortune."

Hermione pulled her legs up on the bed and began to crawl to the far side to get away from the lunch table that pinned her in. Severus stood and reached, managing to grab her ankles and pulled her back to him. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he gathered her up and held her to stop her flight as he glared at Minerva.

"What the bloody hell do you think they were doing Minerva?" He clamped his arms around Hermione to stop her struggles and leaned down to her ear. "Poppy will bring you a potion as soon as you say it."

She pushed against his chest only to find it impossible to budge him. She tried to bring up her knees and kick out her legs to make him release his grip but he only seemed to clutch her tighter. Suddenly she felt safe and unreasonably protected, sagged against him, and sobbed into his neck.

"You won't let them in here, will you sir?" She sobbed, her breathing uneven. "You can keep them out?"

"I can try," Severus said honestly. "I will not lie to you. We can only try."

She rested her head on his shoulder, looked up to his face and then turned to Minerva. "He grabbed me near home. My parents house, only two streets over. I thought it was safe to just walk to the library."

"Hermione? Say it."

"He was mean."

"Hermione, I am losing patience with you."

"He tied me, and used a whip. I think I still have …" She squeezed her eyes shut and panted for breath. "My back and legs took a long time to heal. There are still marks on my…"

"Hermione, say it."

"He…" She looked back up at Severus.

"It is fine, you are safe here. Poppy is right here waiting with your potion."

"He did things." She nodded, and tried to get away from him. "Isn't that enough?"

"This grows tiresome, Miss Granger."

"He raped me sir. In front of the other one, and then…it hurt… it hurt so much…" She turned her face into his shoulder and began to shudder as she gasped for air.

"And then what, Miss Granger?" He clenched his jaw, knowing what she had to say.

"I don't know," she tried to push him away, "I want to go."

"And then what?"

"I feel sick." She lowered her head and hiccupped as she cried. "Poppy?"

"Say it, Miss Granger. Then what?"

"Please," she hissed.

"Miss Granger?"

"You don't understand what it was like!" She covered her face with her hands and tried to twist away from him.

"I can assure you there is nothing you can say that I have not seen."

She leaned close to his ear and raised her hand, placing it on his lips as if to silence him. "He told the other one to take a turn, and he did it to me again…I wanted to die."

"Poppy, I think half a dose of calming potion is in order, and Minerva, have Kingsley step in."

"No!" she screamed, lifting her head as tears ran down her face. "You didn't say he was here."

"I did not say he was not." Severus peeled her arms from around her neck and pushed her back on her bed. "We have enough information to file a report and make a public case against him, however to take it to trial you will need to cooperate."

"He will find them, my mum, and Dad, he said he could. It's my fault."

"Miss Granger, your parents are quite safe. The Dark Lord tried to find them during your last year and was unable to do so with wizards far better at tracking than Lucius." Severus smirked at her. "You know this."

Poppy came blustering over with the potion. Minerva sat behind Hermione, lifting up her body gently as Poppy poured the potion in her mouth.

"There, there, child," Poppy cooed. "You need a little lie in, sleep never hurt anyone."

"Poppy?" Severus took a step away from the bed and indicated that Poppy should follow him. "Lucius is known to injure young inexperienced witches, perhaps…"

"As soon as she calms I will do a compete examination." She looked over to the bed. "She will need to make a trip to St. Mungo's if there is any … well I shall see."

"No, you will bring the Healer here and observe every step." Severus' eyes followed Poppy's to where Hermione lay on the bed, Minerva seated next to her stroking her hair. "Does she have anyone?"

"A Muggle uncle she has not seen in years, and I think two cousins equally as distant." Poppy frowned.

"Do they know of her abilities?"

"We could check her file, they would be listed there as next of kin if they do." Poppy looked back up at him. "I would say that if they did know, Minerva would have them here already."

"Kingsley, stop hiding behind the curtain and file that report." Severus smirked as the curtain moved slightly. "If Minerva will supply an empty pensive I can give you my memory of Lucius' conversation. I will however demand a signed oath that Draco will not be dragged into this."

"No," Hermione struggled to sit up on the bed. "Not Draco, please."

Minerva tried to push her back down only to have her hands swatted away.

"He is the one who helped me get free." She reached out her hand to Severus. "Please."

He stepped closer to the bed and allowed her to take his hand locking his eyes on hers.

"If Lucius finds out," she paused as fresh tears ran down her face. "My gods, if he finds out his own son helped me."

Severus turned on his heel to Kingsley. "Pick up the boy on charges. I do not give a fuck what you think up. Get him out of that house before the report is filed."

"I can not just waltz in there and…"

"Fine, Minerva, get him back in school. Tell him he has to repeat his seventh year because he missed too much time. Tell him there was a mix up with his N.E.W.T.S., anything just get him the bloody hell out of there."

"Severus, you do not honestly think he would hurt his own son?" Minerva sniffed.

"Minerva, my memories of a father's love are indeed different than your own."

Minerva blanched and hurried off to her office to see what she could do. She had heard the horrors Severus had gone through as a child and shuddered to think of what Lucius could do to Draco.

"Miss Granger, this is no longer about just you. This now entails that safety of my godson and that I take very seriously. It is time you spoke to Shacklebolt and get on with this."

"He … I will try." She lifted her chin. "If you write the report I will sign it."

"I fail to see how I am to write a full report of the incidence," he said flatly.

"Can you just look?"

"No," he sat heavily in one of the chairs, "Miss Granger, I am in need of my bed. This is the longest I have been up since the final battle and I grow weary."

"I'll wait until you…"

"Miss Granger?" His voice was low and threatening.

"Severus, I will have none of that." Poppy handed him his potion with a scowl. "I have left orders with the hospital elf to deliver your potion at set times. It does not matter where you are. "

"Kingsley?" He struggled to stand. "At the risk of incurring your laughter, I would like to be taken back to my chambers now."

Hermione watched him struggle and nearly fall to stay upright. She had not realized fully how injured he still was and the sight of him took her thoughts away from herself. She looked at Poppy who bent over him with concern and then to Shacklebolt who was standing watching her.

"Ah," Kingsley nodded at Hermione and then turned back to Severus. "Want another big hug do you?"

He laughed as he put Severus' arm around his shoulders, supporting his weight and spun on his hee, apparating them both back to the dungeons.

"I did not realize he was so weak," Hermione said. "I mean, I knew what happened to him, but I never thought he would be like this."

"He is mending, slower than we would like but he is still mending." She pushed Hermione back to her pillow and pulled up the blankets. "He is concerned about you."

"He is concerned about Draco," Hermione corrected her. "He did help you know. I was surprised when he untied me, and …"

"It is fine my dear. Take your time." Poppy sat on the side of the bed.

"He untied me and brought me clothes." She looked down and turned scarlet at the memory. "He had to … he used his wand to clean me, then he helped me to dress."

She looked up to Poppy. "He gave me a glass of water. It doesn't sound like much does it? At the time it meant everything."

Poppy smiled and nodded. "It is sometimes the little things that mean the most. Go on dear."

"He left the cell door open, and told me the wards on the manor would be dropped for twenty minutes." She wiped her face with the back of her hand. "Lucius had left my wand on the floor where I… where it was dropped. So I just walked out and went home."

"Hermione, I am going to examine you internally. If I need to, I will call in a Healer from St Mungo's to put you right, but only if needed," Poppy said quietly.

Hermione turned her back to her, and curling up as tightly as she could, found her escape as she cried herself to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 4**

* * *

"There." Poppy lifted Hermione's head from the pillow and forced a potion down her throat. "Just in case of infection dear. You are right as rain."

"That's easy for someone not living on a flood-plain to say." Hermione coughed at the suddenness of the potion forced on her upon waking.

"Healer Burton said only a couple of weeks and you will be able to … well we won't worry about that."

"Do not be too sure, Poppy. Mr. Weasley is in the outer room," Severus intoned coldly.

"I can't see him," Hermione hissed, "send him away."

"Miss Granger," Severus said patiently. "As much as I dislike Mr. Weasley, he has been more than patient. This is the third day he has sat in the outer room waiting to talk to you. I fail to see the problem since you allowed him to see you the first day you were here."

"What does he know?"

"That would depend on his mental capabilities, Miss Granger. He knows who took you, how long you were missing and the fact that after several months you are seeking medical treatment. He should have assumed correctly by this point."

"I can't." She turned away and looked at the curtain. "I can't see him, what if he…"

"Miss Granger, you were attacked and beaten. I highly doubt that even someone with the intellect of a fly would believe this to be your fault. If he, or any wizard, thinks a witch could enjoy this they should have a three foot steel rod shoved up their…"

"Severus!" Poppy ran over to him, slapping his arm and shaking her finger in his face. "Term is in session. We do have young ears in here. I warned you before."

Severus felt his lip twitch watching Poppy turn red.

Hermione looked down at the blanket and turned away, finding interest on the wall.

"Miss Granger, it is up to you. However, I suggest either send him packing or talk to him. I am sure Poppy will be listening to every word he says. She does so enjoy overhearing private conversations."

Hermione looked up at him and grinned as Poppy slapped his arm with the folder she had in her hand.

"Much better." He frowned at her. "I came to tell you the report is filed. We have not found Draco yet. Do you have any idea where he could be hiding? Did he say anything to you?"

"Arrested? Lucius is arrested?"

"No, however he will be as soon as he is found. He has disappeared. It appears someone at the Ministry told him of our intentions."

"So, he knows it was me that told."

"Yes, he also knows that if he makes a move toward you he will be caught." Severus looked at her keenly. "I will send the fool boy in now."

"Wait," she said. "What if he comes here, what if he…"

"Miss Granger, I have no idea what will happen. We will set the wards and do what we can to protect you."

"That is it? That is all? I should have said nothing. I never should have allowed the report to be filed."

"It is too late to change your mind Miss Granger."

"My mind? Change my mind? You git! You loathsome git!" She fisted the blanket and glared at him. "This is your fault, you did this."

"If I remember correctly, Miss Granger, I have not touched you." He pinched the bridge of his nose and wanted to be gone.

"Severus, do be kind," Poppy chided.

"I will send in the idiot now."

Ronald sat, bent forward with his forearms resting on his knees, twisting the brim of his grey knitted hat. He looked up as the dour Professor opened the door, only to look back down at the floor.

"Mr. Weasley?"

Ron jerked his head up and then came to his feet, locking eyes with Severus.

"She will finally see me again?" he said, chewing his lower lip.

"Yes." Severus folded his arms and looked at the young man. "Mr. Weasley, do you know why Miss Granger is here?"

Ronald nodded and stopped twisting the hat, cramming it into his back pocket.

"Yes sir, I believe I do." He gulped, not taking his eyes of Severus. "I told her last week she should have told me right off. It was stupid that she waited. Blimey, she could have at least gone to St. Mungo's."

"Mr. Weasley it would be better if you did not dwell on what she did wrong." He looked at Ronald evenly, wondering when the boy had gained so much height and grown into a man.

"She should have known better. It's not as if she wasn't in the war and knew what can happen. I told her she asked for it running around alone, and in those Muggle things she wears."

"How supportive of you." Severus intoned. "It is always so…so kind to hear your own faults pointed out so elegantly."

"It's true. She thinks she knows everything but when it comes to things like… like this she just sticks her head in the sand." He squared his shoulders and started for the ward's door. "I plan on making her understand what she did and make sure it never happens again."

Severus stepped aside and allowed Ronald to enter the hospital wing. He stood for a moment looking at the closed door then smirked.

"Good day Mr. Weasley, so sad we will not see more of you." He clasped his hands behind his back and began his long slow walk back to the dungeons.

He had been taking the new potion for three days now and could walk without the use of the cane. Although mornings were still his worse time, he knew to rest in the afternoon if he planned to do more than sit and drink away the pain in the evening. Today he would once again send out owls to Draco hoping that they would return with a different missive than that which they left.

Twice he had started to write to Narcissa, wondering if her wards were as strong as her son's, and twice could not bring himself to tie the parchment around the owl's leg.

He remembered the night Draco was born. He remembered that Lucius had left on one of his drunken weekends, with any number of witches. He remembered her laying the tiny child in his arms and announcing that he would be godfather to her heir. The feeling that rose up in his chest and exploded when he looked down to the pale face that was Draco's had never fully left him. He had stood and held the child and cursed Lucius for not being there.

Now once again he cursed the man he once called friend and wondered where his godson was as he made his way slowly down the hall.

He sat in his chair and leaned his head back waiting for the pop of the elf's arrival, when the floo activated and Poppy stepped through.

"I have just left you woman. What could have possibly happened in the last…Mr. Weasley I assume?"

"She flew into a rage. She finally broke down and cried as if she were dying."

"If that is all it takes to make you happy, Christmas will be a joyous affair this year."

"Severus she is crying as if her heart is broken. It is good. Now she can start to heal. St Mungo's is sending someone over to talk to her in the morning."

Severus opened his eyes and struggled to sit up straight. "As much as I look forward to your hourly updates Poppy, I fail to see why you are telling me this."

"Minerva sent me here."

"Minerva? She sent you to tell me? She deserves to be at the top of your Christmas list."

"I asked Minerva what we should do with her. Beyond the immediate medical treatment I mean."

"Do with her. Poppy she is not a cat. Speaking of which, has anyone thought to look after that thing of hers?"

"Filch has been feeding it."

"Good, my job is done." He again leaned back in the chair. "Do the same to her. Feed her, show her where the loo is, unless you want her to scratch in the corner, and leave her alone."

"Severus Tobias Snape! You listen to me young man she needs help. We cannot just walk away from her."

"Then run."

"She has sold her parents house, she has no place to return. She came here for her Seventh Year make up and now even if she were to finish she is dreadfully behind."

"She came here to hide. She could have passed her N.E.W.T.s. at the end of her fifth year. Just give her extra assignments, she loves essays. She can catch up. This is Miss Granger we speak of, not Longbottom."

"Minerva wants to give her your First Years. She means to let her teach."

Severus snapped his eyes open and sat up so quickly the grinding of his neck was loud enough for even Poppy to hear.

"You need to get that looked at."

He glared at her as he continued to rise.

"First Years? I should say not. They need the basics drilled into them with an iron hand. It is the time that determines the rest of their potions knowledge." He ran a hand though his hair. "No, not the First Years. And tell her Miss Granger is not ready for the older classes."

"May I tell her Second Year?"

"Absolutely not, Second Year…"

"I know, builds on First Year. Her other idea was that Miss Granger be given an apprenticeship…"

"Third, give her my third years," he hissed at her. "That or give her to Sinistra, she always has had her head in the stars. Better yet, she would make a wonderful addition to Divination. She and Sybil could redecorate the tower."

"I will tell Minerva that you agree with her assessment." Poppy patted his hand. "I do have some good news for you."

"I can hardly wait." He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"St. Mungo's is sending a new potion for that pain in your neck."

Severus raised his eyebrow at her and smirked.

"Don't say it Severus. I mean the real pain, the one that gives you headaches."

"Forgive me for hoping it was the pain in my neck that lies in the hospital wing."

"You couldn't resist could you?"

"No, I could not." He tried to get comfortable but found it impossible with Poppy staring at him. "Out with it."

"She needs a mentor."

"For what?"

"She has never taught before, she will have questions. You need to suggest someone other then yourself, someone with a fair knowledge of your lesson plans."

"She has questions even when she already knows the answers." He sighed and pulled himself out of his chair. "I will give her my third year lesson plans and lists of ingredients. I have never used a substitute, have no plans to do so and have no one familiar with my agenda. I have a study guide and a list of what needs to be included on their essays. That will have to be enough."

"You have a list?" Poppy sounded surprised. "And here we all thought you just graded based on how well you enjoyed dinner."

"I do, she will not." He found the notebook and handed it to Poppy. "Consider her mentored."

"You need to stay away from her for a while."

"I had no intention of inviting her to tea."

"I mean it, Severus. Stay away from her until she is ready to talk to you." Poppy jabbed his with her finger into his chest. "If you need practice being sarcastic pick on someone else for a while."

"Is there any hope of her reconciling with our young Mr. Weasley?" he sneered.

"I will also need potions for her."

"No, I believe she needs to learn to cope, not to cover this up." He shook his head and ran his hand though his hair. "Poppy, the hardest thing I do is not hiding in my bottle and potions. It would be sweet bliss to forget for a day, a week, a month. However, it does not end if I allow that. The memory does not fade or find a place to settle, it only becomes darker and stronger in those few moments between potion and bottle if I put my trust in other than myself."

"We will leave it to the Healer. I would think a weak potion, just to allow her sleep would benefit." She sighed and walked to the floo. "You heed what I say. One word to her and my wand will make it uncomfortable for you to sit for a week."


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 5**

* * *

Severus finished three months of the potion and could at last walk to the lake before needing to rest. He would sometimes walk to the white marble tomb and stand just to remember the things he would rather forget. He could still hear the old man as he told him to remember his oath. He could still feel the spell as it travelled through his arm and into the wand, and he could still see the unsurprised look of gratitude on Albus' face.

Hermione had come up and stood next to him. "I keep expecting to see him walk around a corner or to be sitting at the head table at meals."

"As do I," he sighed and turned to look at her. She looked older with her short-cropped hair and light dusting of make up she had taken to wearing. The absence of bushy hair weighing down her face made her appear less angular, her face less pinched, and she looked more rested than she had at the beginning of term.

He turned back to look at the tomb as he felt her hand on his arm.

"Professor, Minerva requests your presence in her office at once. Something about the Ministry and … well, she will tell you. She only told me something about getting you out of here before the new laws came. About packing and such. She is very upset over something."

He turned back to her raising his eyebrow and then looked back to the castle. "Did she mention what these laws entailed?"

"No, I hope it is not… well, you know, directed at your past somehow." She bit her lip and looked at him. "They gave you the order of Merlin. I don't see that they would take away your teaching credentials now."

"The Ministry will do as they want Miss Granger." He sighed heavily and began walking slowly back to the castle.

Hermione saw his slight stumble, his unsteady gait, and slipping her hand under his elbow began to steady him as she spoke non-stop of the Third Years in her lessons. He watched her out of the corner of his eye knowing she wanted to help, even as she knew he would refuse. He left her arm under his and allowed her to walk him to the castle, surprised that he did not mind.

"You seem much better, Miss Granger. I assume your own class load and that of teaching has not been too strenuous."

"Sometimes, it is difficult, but getting better, I guess. At least I do not vomit at the thought of walking patrol any longer."

"Too bad, I would have liked to watch you encounter Peeves before that particular phase of your healing had passed. You should have informed me of this."

She lowered her head and laughed softly. "I wanted to thank you for the salve you sent to me."

"I know nothing of it."

"Really? Then you are not interested to know that it worked well and I have only two scars that will not heal, however they have faded to half."

"Miss Granger, since I am not at liberty to contact you, and your Healer insists on potions from only St. Mungo's, I fail to see how this concerns me."

"Oh, then I should not say that I have used the last of it and would appreciate half a jar more for the remaining two."

"No. I will mention that I am working on a new potion, altered slightly, to speed the process. I plan to forget one in the dining hall. Perhaps you will be good enough to keep it out of the reach of the children if you find it."

"I will leave you to go up." She told him when the reached the gargoyles. "I have a stack of essays to complete and not much time before curfew. I have patrol tonight. I shall give Peeves your regards."

"Good day, Miss Granger." He smirked and turned to the moving stairs, allowing them to carry him up slowly.

"Professor?" she called up to him, and smiled as he turned to her. "Am I allowed to say thank you?"

"No, Miss Granger. You are allowed no such thing."

Once seated in Minerva's office he heard the pop of the elf that brought him his potion and scowled as a second elf arrived with a tray of tea and sandwiches. This meant it would be a long meeting. It was Minerva's way of warning him.

"Good Day Severus." Minerva smiled widely as she came into the office and moved the tray to a coffee table she had set by the fireplace in front of a sofa. "Join me over here. It is much more comfortable."

"Yes," he sneered, "so very professional of you, Minerva, to have a sitting room in your office."

"Oh, it comes and goes as I see fit."

"I take it this in one of those see fit times." He rolled his eyes and walked to the sofa. Looking at the low sitting soft cushions he sighed. "You know if I cannot get up from here I'll hold you responsible."

He lowered himself into the sofa and leaned back closing his eyes for just a moment to savour the lessening of pain.

"You over did it again today Severus. You should have rested before heading up here."

"Now you watch me from your window? Your turning into a voyeur seems a natural evolution in your development. However, I am surprised you watch me. Filch is much closer to your age."

"Ah yes." She smiled and winked at him. "His legs are much better looking."

Severus chuckled and leaned forward to take a cup of tea. "What do you need, Minerva? Miss Granger said something about new laws."

"Yes, a list we need to go over. How do you want to do this? There is a long list."

"Minerva, I have known you longer than anyone else still alive. Tell me what you have brought me here for." He looked at her evenly, locking his eyes on hers. "Is this specifically about me?"

"Oh heavens, no. What did Hermione say that would lead you to that?"

"Fine, alphabetical. What is first?"

"Apparition points." She looked over her spectacles. "We have to be assigned a point. There will no longer be open apparition to Diagon, Hogwarts, Hogsmeade or Victoria Station. They claim too many accidents are occurring."

"Fine, make a compete list of students and I will reset the wards."

"Broomstick Registration," she sniggered.

"This is a joke." He looked at her incredulously. "Why in Merlin's…there is a fee for each registration."

"May I count on you to do this?"

"Fine, I will take _the_ broomstick for registration."

"Which one would that be," she asked frowning.

"The one that they stop for inspection. It is not as if they have numbers burnt into them."

"Severus?" She frowned at him. "Just take care of all of them."

"Why not Hooch?"

"She will be helping Hagrid with the new Licence Laws."

He looked at her oddly. "I will not ask. I am afraid of what you will say."

"It seems all the creatures in the forest must be…"

"Merlin's nads. How do they expect us to licence a centaur? Of course if the youngest Mr. Weasley needs a part time job I would put in his name for the spiders."

"That is it then." Minerva took his teacup and began to pour him a second cup. "Other than the Marriage law, that about wraps it up."

Severus jerked his head up and felt a coldness begin to creep up his spine.

"Minerva?" His voice was low, too low to sound normal.

"Yes dear?" She tried to smile as she handed him his tea then set it back down on the coffee table, raised her hand and called, "Accio Whiskey."

"It seems the Ministry has done a study on squib births." She emptied his cup back into the teapot and poured a small amount of whiskey into his cup, looked at his face and added an inch more. "They have put a ban on pure blood to pure blood marriage."

"That affects me how?"

"The thought is that pure blood Wizards and Witches have been inbreeding…"

"Skip the introduction, Minerva, and cut to the chase."

"Starting tomorrow a pure blood witch can petition for you. Severus, it is temporary. I am sure the law will be overthrown in no time."

"Minerva, I do not think I am at risk. Name a pure blood witch that would have a blood traitor for a husband," he sniggered and leaned back.

"Funny you should ask." She reached in her pocket and handed him a list of names that had already posted petitions.

He stared at her as he took the list and unrolled it before lowering his head to look at the parchment. Blanching he stood up suddenly as a shot of pain nearly knocked him back down.

"There is not one name on that list that I would allow within these walls. Each one of these would be a threat to the students, not to mention I would find poison in my tea. That would not be the problem. The problem would be not finding it in my tea the next day."

"Is there anyone you can think of that would…"

"No! I will not do this."

"The alternative is not that attractive. Azkaban or you will be banned from working and have your wand taken. Severus, if you chose that path, and are caught using magic … they will strip you of your magic. It can be done."

"Fine. Take my wand."

"Severus, I am sure there is a witch you know that you would not mind having in your bed."

"My bed? Isn't marriage enough?"

Minerva snorted and tried to hide her smile. "I don't see how the problem of squib births could be over come without a little…"

"That's it. I am done here."

"Severus, they will magic the rings and make sure that you, well that you have relations at least twice a week."

"I will be monitored? No, licence me and I will live in the forest. Go get Hooch."

"Severus, as of midnight this becomes law. I am sorry, but there is no way out of it."

"There is one way." Hermione stood at the door. "You just said it starts at midnight. So, he still has twenty-five minutes to marry and not be effected by the law and not be… not be… monitored."

Minerva looked at Severus and smiled. He just sat and stared at Hermione.

"Don't even say it Minerva, don't even think it."

"Professor, all you need is a wife. Until midnight that means you only have to have one on paper. Just in name. If we… If this is all you would expect, that I would just use your name, I do not see a problem with it. I mean, you could give me an oath if that helps."

"She is right Severus. You do not have to consummate the marriage, or even live together. Once the law is overthrown and you are safe, you can file for an annulment."

"Sir? I would be subject to the law myself. I … I really don't want to leave here, I have no place to go."

"Miss Granger, I am sure your list of petitions would give you some far better choices. I suggest you wait and see who wants you."

She looked at the floor and the scrubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands. "I don't want to … I don't think I can… you know… the whole… I can't do it."

She raised her chin and looked at Minerva. "Does the law go into effect for the witches at midnight as well?"

"Yes child, I am afraid they do."

"Then, I will leave my wand in my quarters." She turned to leave.

"Miss Granger." Severus walked over to her and looked at her strangely. "Would not Mr. Weasley petition for you?"

"He… he said that I wanted… I can't. Don't you understand?" She looked away from him.

"He said you wanted to be beaten and raped as evidenced by your walk to the Library?" Severus scowled at her as she nodded.

He sighed deeply and looked up to the ceiling. "Miss Granger, I will no doubt hate myself in the morning. That in no way means what it sounds like. However, I will promise you that a marriage to me will be in name only. At no time will I touch you. Do you want an oath?"

"No, I think I can trust you. I don't think one more oath in this office would put you in a good mood. That and I can always hex you." She tried to grin at him but only managed a grimace.

"We have fifteen minutes." Minerva hurried to the floo and fell on her knees. "I am sure Kingsley would welcome the chance to officiate."

"Joy." Severus sneered. "Miss Granger do you expect a ring?"

"Sir? All I expected when I came up here was a lesson plan for tomorrow's classes. I thought if you were leaving I would take the lessons until a replacement was found."

"Thank you, Miss Granger. I do not think I can take much more this evening." Looking up to see a very happy Kingsley step into the room, he sighed. "I lied."

"Ah, so Minerva told you." Kingsley smiled. "Where is the bride?"

Severus glared at him.

"There is not much time, Snape, I would suggest we…" He stopped and looked at Hermione and back at Severus. "I take it the bride is here, and it is not Minerva."

Hermione rolled her eyes and took Severus arm. "Okay, that's enough, Kingsley. You are getting as bad as he is."

"Are you sure?" Kingsley asked incredulously.

"As long as you get this done in the next few minutes I am. After that clock hits midnight all bets are off." She narrowed her eyes at Kingsley and spoke slowly.

"We will start at once." He stood in front of them and smiled. "Now, if you will please kneel."

"No," Severus said.

"She has to kneel," Kingsley said, leaning close to Severus's ear. "It must be done for the Fidelity Charm to take hold."

"I will not ask her for that. Absolutely not. I will not impose on her that way."

Hermione reddened and looked to the floor as Kingsley raised his eyebrow. "It is to be an open marriage?"

"Oh, good grief." Hermione looked at the clock and chewed her lip. "Listen, how long would you think this law is going to last anyway?"

"There are already bills being pushed forward to outlaw it. I would think a few months at the most," Minerva answered in a rush.

Hermione lowered her self to her knees and looked at Severus scowling. "Eight minutes."

Kingsley took her hand, pulled it up and placed it in Severus'. He tapped their joined hands with his wand and watched as a white ribbon wound around them and disappeared into their skin.

"Severus Tobias Snape," Kingsley said the name slowly and smiled at him. "Do you take Hermione Granger as your wife, promising her full protection of home and family, full inheritance and fidelity?"

"No," Severus hissed. "I will not give her any thing beyond my name. Well, and I will also consent to the protection part."

"You are not adopting her man, you are marrying her." Kingsley scowled at him.

"Try again."

"Do you take her as a wife?"

"Yes," he consented. "I shall also offer protection. That is enough."

"Hermione, do you…"

"Yes, yes, and yes, hurry, the time."

Kingsley looked at Minerva and then back at the couple in front of him. "I need rings."

"She does not want one," Severus glowered. "I asked, she said no."

"Here" Minerva dug in her pocket and pulled out two gold bands.

"You had this planned?" Severus looked at her in wonder.

"Complain later, the time." Hermione watched the clock moving faster.

Severus reached down to where she knelt on the floor and slid the ring on her finger, as she grabbed his hand and pushed his on the third finger of his left hand.

"You are now husband and wife." Kingsley smiled and reached down to help Hermione to her feet.

"Are we done?" Hermione looked at the ring on her finger feeling suddenly ill.

"Just a matter of signatures." Kingsley held out a parchment as the clock began to toll. "Unless you want the traditional kiss."

"Don't push, Kingsley," Minerva said quietly.

Both Severus and Hermione glared at him and then hurried to the desk and crowded together to sign before the tolling of midnight ended. Watching as the document glowed and disappeared they both sighed when they heard the final tone.

"Are we finished?" Hermione looked around.

"Yes, Mrs. Snape, we are." Severus intoned, sounding defeated.

"No, I think I will keep my name of Granger." She blanched and looked to Severus who nodded his agreement. "I will just collect that lesson plan I came for."

Severus reached in his pocket and handed her the parchment.

"Thank you, sir." She looked up at him, appearing more afraid than he remembered ever seeing her. "I will call it a night then."

He watched as she fled the room and heard her footfalls as she hurried down the steps and into the darkness below.

* * *

A/N: In answer to makaem…I did not have Hermione toss her memories in a pensive because I thought that would not really help her to get over the rape and to heal. It would work like the potions, only putting a band-aid on the problem to have it rear up years later. Good question.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 6**

* * *

"Miss Granger, may I have a word?" Hermione looked up from the cauldron she had leaned over with a student, showing the proper stirring technique.

"Yes, Professor," she said softly. "Class? I shall be in the hallway. Mr. Benson, would you please take over?"

The chosen student puffed his chest up and strode to the front of the class, obviously proud.

"Yes, Professor?" Hermione said as she joined Severus in the hallway.

"Miss Granger, the Ministry has set a lecture for this evening. It concerns information on the new cold cauldron methods. I need to attend. Since it is at the Ministry, and we do have a ruse to keep up, I thought it fitting that you accompany me."

"Do you mean the cauldrons from Italy? I have read of them but do not really see the benefit. At the cost I would think it very unlikely that they catch on."

"I agree, however we must approach this with an open mind."

"Minerva is forcing you."

"Yes, there is that as well."

Hermione ginned at him. "I spent seven years thinking you were the meanest, most foul tempered, evil, spiteful person I knew."

He waited for her to finish her comment only to realize she was done. "Thank you, Miss Granger. I work hard to leave a lasting impression. I shall meet you at the apparition point at six."

"Mine or yours?"

"Excuse me?"

"I am a G, you are an S."

He put his hand to the bridge of his nose. "I will reassign you to S."

"Thank you. I need to talk to you about some matters. Perhaps tonight would be a good time?"

"I will collect you after my last class. We will stop at the Leaky Cauldron on the way. You will require robes suitable for the occasion." He looked at what she wore and raised an eyebrow. "I assume those are Muggle clothes under your robes. Most inappropriate for a Ministry function."

She looked down to where the bottom of her jeans showed below the hem of her robes. "I only have Muggle clothing and School uniforms."

"If you prefer, I will collect you from _Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions. _That should afford you enough time to shop before dinner."

"By myself? No, I am sure I can find something that will do. Some of my Muggle dresses are quite nice, and you can hardly…"

"Miss Granger, I will collect you at _Madam Malkin's. _Not just because you are appearing as my… wife… you are also meeting some very important experts in the field. If you decide to continue in this field of study you will find this of great value."

Hermione looked at him and nodded, then watched as he walked away. She wrinkled her brow and looked after him, then closed her eyes to still her breathing. It was just a trip to Diagon Alley. It was broad day light. She would have her wand. She opened her eyes and looked down the hallway willing him to turn around and change his mind, then sighed and returned to her classroom.

After class she headed out to the gate and began to pace. She was not sure with the assigned posts where she would come out in the Alley. She had not travelled with the new rules, and was unsure what to do. She looked back to the castle, and stomped back up the pavement, and to her chambers, sitting heavily in her chair, hugging a throw pillow to her chest and willing her tears not to come.

"Miss Granger." She heard her name called at the same time the pounding started on her door. Rolling her eyes, she hurried over to let Severus in.

"Minerva flooed. She watched you at the gate." He scowled at her, suddenly stopping his berating of her. "You are crying."

"I am not." She lifted her chin. "I was, but I stopped so no, I am not crying."

"What is this?" He reached over and wiped his thumb over her eyes, startling himself as well as her. "I am sorry, Miss Granger, I did not mean…"

"Stop." She waved him away and turned her back on him. "I don't know how to do this anymore, I mean, I am an S. I do not know how to apparate to another S, or do I just think of the Alley, and once I do how… I can't do this."

"Miss Granger," he said and waited until she turned to him. "Are you afraid to apparate or to be by yourself?"

"I have never been afraid…. yes." She looked to the floor.

"It was a two part question."

"Yes and yes."

"I see."

"I don't," she said. "I have never been afraid over nonsense like this before. Now, if there is even a shadow at the end of the hallway I cannot go down it. I am terrified of patrol and the idea of going someplace by myself … Professor I tried, I really did."

"You know he is in hiding. He has not been seen for months."

"I know. But, the other one isn't." She looked away from him, walked to the window, and stood looking out. "I don't even know what he looked like, although I see him every place, every time I hear a footstep I think it is him. Sometimes I think I smell him. I am being stupid, foolish, and childish."

"What does he smell like?" He frowned and looked at her closely.

"Those cheap cigars. You know the ones. They are the same ones the third-years nick from Honeydukes. They put them right out front, as if the students won't find them. Bloody hell, they no doubt leave them sick the same way they did when…. Okay, time to go."

"I think not, do finish your story." He felt his lip twitch.

"Story?"

"Miss Granger?"

"Professor, it is like a rite of passage, the third years must steal a cigar. So, on their first Hogsmeade day they all head for Honeydukes."

"Am I to believe that you stole a cigar?"

"Of course not, I opened an account and bought one. You see, I looked up the laws in the library and found there are no wizard laws against cigars, so I decided the easiest thing to do was just to buy them and say I took them."

"Them, the plot thickens."

"I needed three of course."

"Of course."

"Anyway, they smelled like he did."

"Tell me Miss Granger. Did you really smoke a cigar without getting sick?"

"Yes, I think so."

"This is just getting better."

"It may have been the cigar, but I seem to remember thinking at the time it may be the whiskey."

Severus snorted, quickly turned and walked to the door. The picture of a third year drunken Hermione, smoking a cigar as she staggered down the hallway just flashed in front of him.

"I will take you to _Madam Malkin's_. You need proper robes," he repeated himself weakly, not knowing what to say to her then smirked knowing he could revisit this later.

"You would do that? You would stay with me?" She turned back to look at him.

"Yes, this time. You need to learn to do things on your own. I have better things to do."

"I know, I keep hearing that from that idiot Healer that keeps coming. We could floo from here. I am on the network."

Severus looked at her and scowled. "Who put these chambers on the network Miss Granger?"

"They were like that when Minerva moved me here the day after … the day after we married."

"You have had an open floo in your chambers for six months now and are too afraid to travel alone?" He shook his head and ran his hand though his hair. "I do not understand you at all. For nine months now you have lived here in fear and for six of them given access to everyone with an open floo."

"I feel safer. I can get out that way if I have to. I mean," she paused and looked back at him and then at the door, "if I am trapped in here how else could I get out?"

"The floo comes down now." He pulled out his wand and began to ward the floo, taking it off the network and rendering it unusable to even the elves.

"NO!" She launched herself at his arm and knocked his wand to the floor. "I can't stay here without it. Put it back. Put it back now. Do you hear me?"

She scrambled to pick up his wand and thrust it out to him. "Here, fix it. I said fix it."

"Miss Granger, stop this at once." He grabbed her shoulders and was about to shake her when she slumped to her knees in tears.

He squatted down in font of her and with a sigh and reached out to turn her face up to his. "It is unsafe. Anyone can come in. Do you understand?"

"I can't get out." She looked at him, trying to keep her eyes from his. "I will be… I know what it sounds like. It sounds like I am weak and foolish, but I need a way out."

"I will have Minerva add you to the castle's wards. If you can forget what you read in you History of Hogwarts books, it is possible to apparate within the walls. There are special charms, available only for security. Minerva will give you one that allows you and only you to leave this room. Understood?"

"Thank you," she said turning red. "I didn't know that. If I had, I could have asked her for it. Can she do the same to the Floo?"

"Not on a one way basis. She could open it between two rooms, but not from only one to the other."

He stood up, dragging her with him. "Now, wash your face. We need to hurry if you are to get your shopping done."

Hermione nodded and walked to the loo keeping her head down and walking stiffly. She cursed herself and pressed her lips together, embarrassed the she had made a fool of herself in front of him again. She slammed the door behind herself and looked in the mirror rolling her eyes at the sight of her swollen eyes and running nose. _Gads_, she thought, no wonder he still sees me as a child.

She cupped cool water in her hands and lowered her head to them only to find she could not stop sobbing. Leaning on her hands, she lifted her head and took a deep breath, reached for her wand to repair her face, and comb her hair. She tried to smile into the mirror and finally decided that since he did not like _cheerful_, she was ready.

It did not take her long to pick out robes. She headed for the rack closest to the door and grabbed two, and then found the dresses in her size. She glanced over her shoulder twice and both times, he was watching her. She smiled at him and turned back to the rack feeling more at ease than she had thought at first possible just knowing she was not alone.

She threw a third dress over her arm when she felt a presence at her elbow and turned around quickly, dropping the garments as she struggled to find her wand.

"My dear, entirely my fault. I do have a tendency to sneak up." Madam Malkin smiled at her. "The fitting room is right this way."

"I know where the fitting room is, but I am sure these will fit." She began to scoop up the clothing from the floor.

"Oh no, Mrs. Snape, I am sure he would much prefer something better. He has selected these for you to try on." She smiled and thrust an arm full of clothing toward Hermione.

Hermione looked down and flipped over the price tag on the top set of robes, before shoving them back at Madam Malkin. "I am sure he meant to help, however I prefer the ones I have chosen."

"Mrs. Snape, I assure you he has exquisite taste."

"From that price I am sure he does," she spat, holding her choices tightly.

"He has never made a purchase that has been returned."

"Oh really?" Hermione raised her eyebrow and smirked. Surprised she had never considered that he might have a life outside of Hogwarts. "And, just how many witches does he buy for?"

Madam Malkin turned red and turned back to look at Severus who now stood scowling at them. "I am terribly sorry. I have spoken out of turn."

"Not at all." Hermione began to laugh as she looked at Severus, then she turned back to Madam Malkin all the more curious. "When was the last time he was in here?"

"I am not at liberty to say anything more. I should not have said what I did. Mrs. Snape I am so sorry."

"Oh, think nothing of it." She grinned again seeing Severus looking around uncomfortably. "Just charge these to my account."

"You still want those?" She almost curled her lip in disgust at her own merchandise.

"Yes, they are fine." Hermione dug through the pile and took a dress and one set of robes with her. "These I'll wear out. Get the bill ready and I will take care of it as soon as I am done."

"Yes, Mrs. Snape," Madam Malkin sniffed.

Hermione walked to the changing room and opened the door. She looked at the cramped space and the hooks on the wall to hold clothing and took a step backwards. Looking down at the clothing and back to the room, she bit her lip and tried to think of another place to change.

"Bloody Hell," she said aloud and looked back to the changing room.

"I will stand right outside the door, Miss Granger."

"He had hooks on the wall, this just reminded me. He tied me to them at night so I couldn't rest. I stood all night tied to a hook." She looked back at the changing room. "These are just for clothes and … I will be fine. You said you would wait?"

"I will not move from this spot."

She nodded and stepped into the room, peeked out to make sure he was still there, and changed into the new dress and robes. She turned to the mirror and shrugged. A lecture at the Ministry was not her idea of a real night out, however she knew appearances meant a lot to Severus. She turned around and checked the back, satisfied that she looked appropriate and stepped out of the changing room to find him still standing as he said he would.

"Thank you, Professor." She turned red as he smirked at her. "I guess I was being foolish again."

"We must hurry if we are to eat before we attend the lecture."

"Yes." She looked around for a clock. "Let me just take care of the bill and we can go."

"I have already taken care of the billing. They will deliver the packages to the castle."

"I have my own money." She felt cold and unsure of herself. "I don't want you to pay."

"It was not much, and it was my suggestion."

"No." She reached in her pocket for her wand. "How much was it? The total."

"Hermione, you have not changed the name on your account. Your signature will not affix as payment."

"Oh, that is what my payments have all said when they were returned. I will pay you back, or not take these at all."

"Explain." He crossed his arms over his chest and glared at her.

"About what?"

"Your returned payments."

"I have made payments on my accounts but they keep sending me bills saying my account is not my account. I never did study debits and credits and the bank letters always appear backwards, have you ever noticed? I cannot understand why. The last note was rather rude and said they would only talk to my husband. As if I had a… oh."

"Go on."

"Have you ever heard of anything so male chauvinistic? I mean I know this world is a few years behind but…"

"Miss Granger, you do understand that any shortage is taken from my account? Do you further understand that each month this is done a shortage _fee_ is taken from me as well?"

"Oh."

"How long has this been going on?"

"Since the wedding?" she squeaked.

"How many accounts?"

"Six?"

"Twenty- five Galleons an occurrence, which is one hundred fifty Galleons a month, Miss Granger. In six months you have cost me nine hundred Galleons."

"I'll buy dinner?" She smiled thinly.

"Dinner." He stared at her as he felt the pain in his neck return.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 7**

* * *

Two weeks after the lecture, Severus paced in his quarters, waiting for Hermione to keep her appointment. He looked at the clock on the mantel and began to pace faster. He hated to wait and he hated the fact that he had to meet with her to go over their accounts.

By the time he heard her soft knock on the door he was ready to berate her. Opening the door, he saw the puffiness around her eyes, how she worried her lip and the look of concern on her face.

"Miss Granger, please take a seat at the table I have set up in the sitting area." He watched as she walked to the table, not able to vent his anger as he had intended. He shook his head and cursed the Ministry.

"Miss Granger, I have before you the state of your accounts."

She looked at them and frowned.

"We will take one at a time and make sure they are correct. This one for example, is from Flourish and Blotts."

Hermione took the statement and nodded as she looked at the titles. "Yes, they all seem correct as are the prices."

She looked up at him and handed him the parchment back.

"You purchased two copies of the same book, Miss Granger."

"Yes, well sometimes Crookshanks gets angry at me and shreds a book or two. Not often mind you."

"Fine, it would be less expensive if you remembered to place them on the book shelf, or perhaps ward them?"

"Yes, sir?" She bit her lip and craned her neck to see the next book on the list.

"The next three on this list can be found in the library not two floors over your rooms." He looked at her and waited patiently.

"Yes, sir?" She looked at him and raised her eyebrows.

"Why? Even if you did not feel comfortable walking to the library," he held up his hand to her coming protest, "you could have called an elf to collect them."

She nodded at him and looked at the list again.

"Miss Granger, this list only has two books that you should have purchased. Do you have a compelling reason for doing this?"

She shook her head, looked at him blankly, and watched as he laid the list down and picked up the one to Honeydukes.

"I do not think I need to say more than the fact that you are the only person I know that has an account at a sweet shop."

"That is unfair. I hardly use it."

"Yet I have paid twenty-five Galleons a month for six months for your monthly payment of, umm let's see. Eight galleons. Not much to pay for a good cigar."

"Oh."

"Miss Granger, how have you survived until now?"

"I only shop for things on sale." She lifted her chin defiantly. "Like those robes, they were inexpensive and serviceable. I can get years of wear from them."

"Miss Granger, if you managed better you would have nine hundred Galleons to spend on robes."

"Oh." She licked her lips and looked at him. "The bank used to take care of it. If my account ran short, they would contact my solicitor, who would transfer some from my parents account. I never realized how much it was. I would not have had the short fees. They would have just transferred from them."

"Since our accounts are now combined I have made you a ledger." He handed it to her. "I have listed the amount you had at transfer and taken off the expense. What shows is what you have left. If you need to see the documentation, I have that as well."

"No, this is fine."

"Miss Granger, I dislike this as much as you. It is however important to keep our accounts separate. I did not mean to pry into you private life."

"Not at all." She looked at the ledger frowning. "I will earn my certificate in a couple of months. After that, I will find a job."

"Will you be able to live outside the castle?"

"I think so." She looked up at him. "I think it is better. Poppy seems to think … Professor? Ronald, what he said, about… well you know. About the way I dressed and all."

"Yes?"

"It's not true. I have been going over it in my mind and I know he is wrong." She looked at the table and shook her head. "I think it is worse here, in this world I mean. Everyone is so old fashioned here. I mean, I can see that he may be right about here, but I was in the Muggle world."

"We were both born in the Muggle world Miss Granger. We both grew up there, and still have ties to it. Do you really think that here or there what you wear could have made a difference? No, what happened to you had nothing to do with your dress habits, here or there. Do you understand that what he did to you has nothing to do with sex? Lucius uses people for power, Miss Granger, power and control."

"Are we done?" She stood without answering his question, needing to change the topic.

"Almost," he sighed. "Minerva is unable to offer you lodging after your seventh year completion."

"I have been reading the Prophet for rentals, but until I finish and find a job it is impossible to know what to look for."

"Yes, well there is a further complication." He stood and walked to the far wall and with a wave of his wand revealed a hidden doorway. "If you will join me?"

She raised her eyebrow at him as she slid from the chair to join him at the doorway.

"Your new quarters."

"My what?" She stepped back and glared at him.

"Do not make his harder than it already is, Miss Granger." He stepped though the hidden doorway and with a flick of his wand lighted the candles and fireplace.

"This is your sitting room. The bedchamber is thru there, as is the bath." He turned to the right and flicked more candles ablaze. "Your desk and bookcases can go here and that door goes to the hallway. This door will be kept closed and warded unless there is need to open it."

"I thought you said she could not offer me accommodations."

"She is extending my chamber to make room for my wife. The doorway will only be opened for the Ministry's inspections, or as I said, if there is a need."

"This better be good." She wrapped her arms around her middle and stepped into the rooms.

"Minerva assures me there will be ample warning."

"Warning?"

"Please do not do that."

Hermione looked at him confused. "Now what have I done, spent a sickle?"

Severus felt his lip twitch. "You have a habit of taking what I say and turning it into a question."

"A question?"

"Exactly," he crossed his arms and looked down his nose at her.

"Isn't that sweet," Minerva stepped out of the floo. "You sound just like an old married couple."

Hermione rolled her eyes. "I thought I was not allowed a floo?"

"This floo will only allow travel to and from my office or the hospital dear. It has not been used for a couple of years now." She looked to Severus. "It was for special needs. We thought to open it again, since Severus will be here if anything goes amiss."

"Have you heard anything on overturning the law?" Hermione asked.

"No dear, I am afraid not." She patted Hermione's shoulder. "We have heard that there have been two _accidents_ with Muggle born brides."

Hermione blanched and sat down. "Who?"

"One of the Chang girls. Not our Cho, one of her cousins. And a witch from France that thought to hide here from rogue Death Eaters." Minerva wiped her eyes. "It sickens me. How can they allow this to go on?"

"I have also heard the Mr. Weasley is engaged to Lavender, and Harry and Ginny will wed any day now."

Hermione nodded and excused herself as she hurried to the hallway and began to run back to her room. She did not love Ronald. She had sent him away. She was sure she did not want him anymore, not after what he said, not after the way he had treated her. And definitely not after she had seen the look of disgust on his face after he had learned what happened. Lavender would be a good wife. She would take care of him. She liked Lavender. She did not care if he married her. She would not miss him any more, or wait for his owl to tap on her window at night as the wind came howling around the north tower. She would not look for him, with his long legged gait, or want to see his lopsided grin.

She missed the first stair, unable to see it through her tears. She landed hard on her knees and stayed down, trying to take deep breaths, trying to stop the sobs that racked through her body.

That is where he found her as he hurried after her, not knowing what she was feeling and only with Minerva's prompting had he run after her. He squatted down on the stairs and watched her cry before he sat and pulled her into his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and cried, hanging on to him tightly.

"I hate him."

"Of course."

"I do," she pushed him away until she could look up at him." He is mean, and thoughtless. I don't even like him a little bit."

"Of course."

"Professor? Have you ever wanted to go home but didn't know where it was? That's what I feel like. I want to go home."

"What does this have to do with Mr. Weasley?"

"He felt like home." She laid her head on his shoulder. "Now I have no one. I have no home, and now he doesn't want me anymore. It hurts."

"You said you hated him," he said, unable to hide his smirk.

"I do," she whispered. "I do, I hate him. He is mean and spiteful and only cares what others think."

"Then why do you cry?"

"I love him." She buried her head in his neck and continued to cry.

Severus clenched his jaw and looked away from her. He needed to rid himself of her and noticed that Minerva's _we_ as in her _we must go after her _did not include her. He made a mental note to compare her to the Queen as he attempted to disengage himself from the witch wrapped around his neck.

"Miss Granger, this in most inappropriate. This is a common hallway, accessible to the students."

"I am sorry," she whispered as she slowly removed her arms from his neck and slid off his lap back to the step. "I don't know what got into me. Pease, I …. I need to get back to the room."

"Miss Granger," he said quietly. "You must also view this from his perspective. You are married. I am sorry. I should not have been so hasty in avoiding this law. Perhaps if I had reacted differently you could have a more normal life."

She turned her head away from him but nodded her understanding then grabbed the railing and pulled herself up, turned slowly and climbed the stairs. He sat and listened until he could no longer hear her footfalls before he rose to go back to his own chambers, cursing Minerva under his breath.

"How is she?" Minerva asked anxiously.

"How do you think she is?"

"I have heard that Lavender had no other petitions for her."

"Great, perhaps we should also share that information with Miss Granger. I am sure the fact that it was his choice and not the law would make her rest more easily." He sat down in his chair letting his eyes travel to the bottle of whisky and the cigars on his chair side table.

"Have you heard more of Draco?" she asked softly.

"Not since the sighting in Little Hangleton. I have made a list of everyone he would trust but cannot decipher who his secret keeper would be." He ran his long fingers through his hair. "I need to get a message to him. He needs to know that Hermione has absolved him of guilt."

"I think it is more a matter of hiding from Lucius."

"Minerva, as far as he knows both his father and the Ministry is after him. Bloody hell, in many cases it is the same thing."

"Perhaps Narcissa will slip. I would think it more likely that she will have a harder time in hiding than her son." Minerva started to the floo. "I have sent messages to the Black's, at least the ones we can still call friend, to no avail. I thought perhaps they would help in finding Draco."

"In finding him they would have to give up Narcissa. As much as we wish it were not true, she is still family and as such they will not tell us."

"Poppy said you have been leaving the castle in the evenings. The elf has not been able to bring you the potion which means you have warded yourself." She looked at him sadly. "Please tell me you are not setting yourself back to your old ways."

"Since we have nothing further to speak of, I will bid you goodbye." He looked at her coldly, and in a billow of robes returned to his own chambers.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 8**

* * *

"Minerva it has been a year and a half. You said this law would be over in a few months." Severus had been pacing in her office since he had begun his rant.

"I don't know why you are worried about the inspection, Severus. It is to be expected."

"Why would I assume to expect this?"

"The Ministry has heard rumours about marriages such as your own, marriages that happened within a few hours of the new law being only ruses. If they are found to be…in name only, unconsummated, the Ministry can enforce an annulment. It appears their plans for a future generation of squib-free births is floundering."

"What a surprise," he said flatly.

"Has she had time to become familiar with your quarters?"

"She is there now, poking around my personal belongings."

"She needs to know where things are kept if she is to appear believable."

Severus looked at the clock rolling his eyes. "Ten minutes and I will be in hell."

"Stop that," Minerva chuckled. "It will not be that bad. Hermione is a resourceful girl."

"That is what worries me."

"You go ahead now. I will send them down as soon as they come. I can buy you a little time and say the floo is down."

Severus stepped into the fireplace and threw down the powder calling out, "My quarters." He looked around the bottom of the floo before glaring at Minerva. "You have forgotten to tell me something perhaps?"

"Yes, dear." She walked over, grabbed a handful of powder, and tossed it at his feet. "Mr. and Mrs. Snape's Chambers," she said as she smiled and waved to him.

"She changed the floo command," he spat to Hermione who sat of the floor with her back to him.

"Professor, are these you?" She turned and held up Muggle baby pictures to him.

"I did not give you permission to snoop in my private belongings."

"I thought that was why I was here." She narrowed her eyes and drilled him with her look. "I don't like this any more than you, maybe less, so don't go getting all high and mighty with me."

"Respect Miss Granger."

"Oh, my." She stood up and shoved the pictures back into the bottom desk drawer. "What am I to call you? I can't run around calling my husband Professor and sir."

"Master will do."

She saw his lip twitch and smiled at him. "So, what will it be?"

"My name is Severus, you are aware of that."

"Please don't call me those stupid nick names. Call me by my proper name."

"Of course, Hermione, I am sure this will be painless."

"I guess. If this is only a once a year thing, it won't be so bad. The law will be repealed before the next one rolls around."

They both turned when the knock came to the door. Hermione ran to the sofa, jumped on it tucking her legs under her, and grabbed a book. "Okay Severus, I'm ready."

"Miss… Hermione, what are you doing?"

"I am pretending to be your wife you arse, now open the door."

Severus glared at her before walking to the hall door and throwing it open.

"Hello Professor. I am Mrs. Giles from the Department of Human Services."

"Human Services? Tell me Mrs. Giles, what else does the Ministry Service? That is, besides humans?"

"We do service werewolves, Professor."

"Since you do so during only the times the moon is _not_ full I fail to see the distinction."

Hermione wrinkled her brow and looked down at the book. A sudden image of Remus flashed in front of her. She looked back up to see Severus stepping back and allowing Mrs. Giles to enter as she wanted to send him her silent thanks for his defence of werewolves. She was surprised that he had said it so smoothly and wondered if it were only part of the ruse.

"Hermione, this is Mrs. Giles from the Ministry." He looked at Hermione and scowled as she kicked her shoes off. "Mrs. Giles, my wife, Hermione Snape."

"Yes I know. I was quite pleased to see that I would be meeting one of the trio."

"Trios? I should say not Mrs. Giles." Severus folded his arms over his chest and scowled at her. "We do not have an open marriage. I am afraid we are rather traditional in the sex department."

Hermione's smile froze on her face and turned to a grimace as she went scarlet.

"Please Mrs. Giles, I will ask you not to embarrass my wife with that type of talk again or I will have to ask you to leave."

Hermione finally managed to swallow and close her mouth.

"You know very well I did not mean that." Mrs. Giles sniffed, pushed her glasses back up her nose and turned back to Hermione.

"I see you have been married well over a year now. However, you are still not pregnant. Mrs. Snape, are you using birth control?"

Hermione shook her head an emphatic no as Severus snorted. She glared at him and raised her eyebrow as a warning, the turned back and sweetly smiled at Mrs. Giles.

"You are not covered by the law but we do need to know why a healthy young witch such as yourself is having difficulties."

Hermione looked at Severus who shrugged his shoulders and left her to answer with a smirk at her discomfort.

"Mrs. Snape, surely you do not need your husband's permission to answer."

"Of course not, Mrs. Giles, it is his fault."

"I see," she said scribbling notes on a piece of parchment with Hermione peeking over her hand to see what she wrote.

"No, I did not say _that_ kind of problem. His sperm are fine." Hermione smiled up at him sweetly. "He has issues."

Severus seethed as he heard the scratching of the pen and the quill again dipped in ink.

"I am so sorry to hear that Professor. It must be hard for a man of your age."

Hermione grabbed a pillow and held it over the mouth, holding her breath as she shook, afraid to breathe.

"No," she wheezed and shoved the pillow tighter to her mouth to still her laughter. She leaned forward and tried to stop. Pulling the pillow away, she gasped. "Not _hard_ at all." She held her breath hoping that would help. "That's the problem," she squeaked, pushing the pillow back in place.

Still holding it to her mouth, she ran from the room and collapsed on the bedroom floor unable to stop laughing. The more she tried to stop the harder she laughed and the harder she laughed the more she tried to stop.

She leaned back against the footboard on the bed and closed her eyes, taking great gulps of air. When she opened them again, she saw his long legs and tapping foot in front of her.

"I got nervous." She looked up at him suddenly feeling the humour wash off her.

"She thought you were in tears." He smirked at her and shook his head. "Well done, Miss Granger."

"Severus? Would you still call me Hermione?" She tipped her head up to look up to see his face. "It makes you sound like a friend."

"I am not your friend, Miss Granger," he said pointedly.

"I know." She held on to the bed as she stood up. "I am sorry, Professor. If we are done I have packing to do."

"Please, Miss Granger. I need a moment." He walked back into the sitting room and waited until she sat to take the chair opposite her.

"I have spoken to Kingsley on your behalf. Whereas we both consider you to be in no further danger, you may find yourself in certain situations in which you feel uncomfortable."

"Professor, I have not had a nightmare for over three months and no longer keep candles lit all night. I was acting like such a ninny. Honestly, I am fine."

"I hope you are correct. However, Hogwarts is a closed community. You will find it much harder in a larger world."

"I have to try. I can't hide here forever. Minerva and Poppy, and even you Professor, have been very kind to me. Now it is time to move on."

"What job offers are you considering?"

"I have accepted a position in Diagon Alley. It is a new establishment. I will be starting in the apothecary purchasing and sales division, however there is room for advancement."

"Have you found suitable accommodations?"

"Here, I wrote it down for you." She dug in her pockets, then blushed and looked up. "You know, in case we had to do this again, or if you are in need of me. Here it is."

Severus took to parchment and looked at the address with a raised eyebrow. "Miss Granger, this is in Knockturn."

"Only just, about four doorways in is all." She bit her lip nervously. "It's not much, but I can afford it. In addition, it has an apparation point right outside the door. I still go to St. Mungo's once a week, this will make it easier."

"I cannot allow this."

"It is not up to you."

"Once you put your name to a lease it is registered with the Ministry. Do you not think they will wonder how I allow my wife to live in Knockturn Alley while I stay at Hogwarts?"

"I didn't think of that." She looked up at him innocently.

"I will have my solicitor find a suitable place and I will pay the difference in the lease."

"I can't take your charity Professor." Slowly she stood to leave.

"It is not charity. I would rather have you in town than here." He leaned back and looked at her evenly. "I am not a man that likes complications, and you Madam, complicate my life."

Hermione looked at him coldly and walked to the door. "Fine, have it your way. Good day, Professor."

"Miss Granger." He stood and nodded to her, watching as she walked out and shut the door.

He leaned back in his chair and looked again at the address she had scribbled on the parchment. He knew the property was owned by Malfoy Industries held under the name of a subsidiary company to make the holdings harder to trace, and easier to run illegal money through. If she had looked at the property, Lucius would be aware of it. He only hoped she had used Mrs. Snape and not Miss Granger on any application she had filled out.

He felt his world spinning out of control again, and steeled himself for what he knew was coming. _Less then two years of peace_, he thought, and wondered how much more he could hope to have.

He inspected the new apartment his solicitor had found him a few days later, approved the lease, and made sure his name that appeared on the registration. He warded the floo, changing the network to work between here and her hidden quarters in Hogwarts that he kept closed off until she had need of them. He set up an account for her at the local grocery and smirked when he saw a sweet shop two doors down from her entry.

His next stop was at Borgin and Burkes where he picked up a small music box that he placed on her coffee table, and a small mirror for her to carry in her purse. The music box, spelled to warn him of danger in her apartment, he knew she would accept as a small personal token. It was the mirror he needed to find a way to make her carry, without letting her know of the charms it held.

He collected her after his last lesson that Friday, taking her by way of her private floo to her new apartment.

"I should have had some say in this." She crossed her arms and looked around the sitting area. "This is a third floor walk up. I would have preferred street level."

"This is safer, Miss Granger," he said as he opened the door to the bedchamber. "There is a second floo in here. It is only connected to your chambers at Hogwarts. The loo is though the door on the right, the left your cupboard."

"So, if I have guests they will have to walk into my bedroom to use the loo. I don't like it."

"It is not a matter of liking. It is a matter of safety. The kitchen is small. There is a table and four chairs, making it adequate for simple entertaining."

He walked back into the sitting room and folded his arms glaring at her. "Miss Granger, there are few vacancies, and even less in the price range I am willing to spend. This will have to satisfy your needs."

"Fine," she threw her purse on the sofa and sat down. "It won't be for long. Minerva thinks the law will be overturned soon."

"One can hope."

"And Professor," she said, smiling sweetly. "Take your music box with you."

"How…" he started again, "Miss Granger, you need protection. This will alert me if you are in danger."

"I will already know if I am in danger."

"This will alert me if you are not home. If your wards are breeched, if someone has entered before you return, I will be able to head off a disaster."

Hermione looked at the music box and nodded. "I am sure this came as a pair Professor."

"Yes, there is also a small mirror you can carry in your purse, or in your pocket," he said through clenched teeth.

"Pocket." She looked up at him. "So, this is it right? I mean, I won't be seeing you much after I get my things moved in. Although if I know you, the elves are packing as we speak."

"If the law is not overturned there will be the yearly inspections."

"That often, hey?" She grinned at him. "How about dinner once in a while? I mean, I will need to know about my accounts, and maybe we can go to a lecture or two at the Ministry."

"We will go over the accounts as needed, Miss Granger. I fail to see how dinner would help you keep track of your expenses."

"Professor, if I want to add someone to the floo, how would I do that?"

"If the destination is secure, and there is no risk, it is a simple procedure."

"Yes, but how would I do it?"

Severus raised his eyebrow at her. "I see, give me his name and I shall add him."

"Who it is doesn't matter, and I do not care to share the information with you."'

"Can you trust him?"

"Gods Severus, I just asked for a what-if… what if I wanted to."

"In that case we will leave this conversation for a later date." He turned to the sound of the Hogwarts elves arriving with her belongings. "I shall tell Minerva you send your regards and will be in touch with her."

"Thank you," Hermione said to the empty spot on the floor that he had had been standing in only a moment before. Calling the elf, she gave it the music box, instructing it to take the item to her Hogwarts quarters, and began to unpack.


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 9**

* * *

Hermione kept her head down, hugging her portfolio to her chest and walked down the cobbled pavement to her apartment. Tears stung the inside of her lids and her nose began to run. She knocked into an elderly witch almost tipping her over and listened to the foul mouthed hag berate her as she kindly picked up her packages, shoved them back into the old women's hands and walked on.

It was bad enough to be out of work, now she had to face Severus about her portion of the lease and the high account she had racked up at the grocery. _Gods_, she thought, how would she ever explain that one? She stopped at the owl post to send a short missive to him, and paying the small fee pulled out her notebook and made an entry of the amount.

She passed Honeydukes and stopped to look in the window sighing at the chocolate covered raspberries and hand dipped strawberries. She had closed her account long ago and with little in her pockets, she sighed and moved on.

"Hermione?" She snapped her head up to see Ronald blocking her way. "I thought it was you. It has been ages. How are you, Hermione?"

She looked up at him and sniffed. "Ronald, fancy my seeing you today."

"Mione? Are you okay?" He stepped forward and reached for her face to brush her tears away only to drop his hand before touching her. "You look like shite."

"Thanks, you always did know how to make me feel better." She tried to grin. "Just a bad time at work."

"So how is it with Snape? Blimey Hermione, I couldn't believe when I heard you married the git."

"I hear you married Lavender." She bit her lip and looked around nervously. "Congratulations, Ronald."

"She's due in four months." Ronald beamed at her. "Mum is beside herself, and Fleur treats her like she is made of glass."

Hermione nodded at him, and did the best she could to smile. She felt her bottom lip begin to tremble and turned away from him. "I am in a hurry Ronald. Severus is meeting me for lunch."

"Oh, yeah sure." He stepped aside. "I don't want to make you late."

She pushed past him and walked the rest of the way quickly, running up the stairs and un-warding the doors. She burst into the darkened room and flopped on the sofa, still hugging her purse to her as the tears ran down her face.

She sat for a long time, not noticing the shadow growing long across the floor, or the air grow colder as the sun lowered and the grate went unlit. She did not hear the knocking on the door or the sound of the wards coming down. She did not even feel the arms that picked her up and lay her on top of the bed.

She rolled to her side, at last able to close her eyes, and sought sleep, pushing away the sound of him calling her name.

Severus pulled up a chair next to the bed and frowned at her. He had read the missive several times, before admitting defeat and taking it to Minerva. She had lifted her brow and shrugged, suggesting that he visit her and excusing him from patrol.

Now he pulled it out and studied it again before taking out his wand and thinking to cast a simple incantation to enter her mind. He laid the missive on the table and stared at it.

Severus, Professor

I help, now how?

I cannot. Please. I am redundant

It was hours later, after midnight when she opened her eyes and began to sit up before seeing him asleep in the chair. She looked down and frowned to see she still wore her robes and shoes. She thought back and could remember seeing Ronald, but after that nothing.

Swinging her feet over the edge of the bed, she reached over to take off her shoes.

"Miss Granger? Your missive had Minerva worried."

"My missive? Oh, yes. I needed to let you know as soon as I could. The rent will be due soon and… I am going to be short."

"You have lost your job." He sighed and leaned back in his chair. "That much was clear. However, the rest of it was not."

"Yes, I wrote I was found redundant. I should get my last pay check in a two weeks but I thought you should know."

"You also wrote that you were helping someone,"

"No," she frowned and shrugged off her robes. "I didn't. I meant to say I needed help. I was upset when I wrote it."

"Hermione, I have the missive." He picked it up and held it out to her.

"I, I must have forgotten," she whispered. "Yes, I must have been confused, I meant I, I needed help, is that not what I wrote?"

She stood and stepped away from him quickly. "I am putting tea on, will you stay?"

"I am late as it is."

"Severus," she laid her hand on his arm. "Please, a cup of tea. Just tea. You need not be nice or polite, just please, stay for tea. I think I have the kind…I would rather not be alone."

"Miss Granger?" Her held her arms and locked his eyes on hers. Bringing his wand up by his side to hide it until the last possible moment he tapped it to her forehead and muttered a soft _Legilimens!_

He saw the youngest Weasley boy and he saw Hermione bump into the hag, he saw her lifting an owl into the air and the vision of chocolate and raspberries, he saw an older wizard push her against a file cabinet and slide his knee between her legs as he pushed his weight into her. He felt the rising of bile and the panic she felt, and he saw as she raised her hand against him, pushing him away as his hand reached under her blouse…. He pulled back and broke the connection.

"Shite." He ran his hand though his hair.

Her hands covered her face as she backed away from him. "You had no right. None."

"Miss Granger, it was you that sent for me."

"I didn't send for you. Why would I? Why would I want you here of all people? "

"You were not fired. You quit."

"I had to. I couldn't let him… he… bloody hell, you saw what he wanted to do." She turned and ran for the kitchen.

"Where was the mirror I told you to carry?"

"In my other robes."

"In the morning we will return to your place of employment. We will request a meeting with his superior and we will correct the matter. Never again are you to leave without the bloody mirror." He sat at the kitchen table. "In the mean time you may throw that tea out."

"Why?" She looked down at the pot.

"It smells horrid."

She picked up the tin, read the label, and grinned. "Oh."

She dumped the teapot in the sink and started again. "Professor?"

"Yes, Miss Granger."

"Thank you for coming. Do you still take milk?"

"Yes," he sighed, knowing it would be a long night.

"I don't want to go back there." She turned around and put two cups on the table then sat to join him. "I can find something else."

"We will take care of the matter in a few hours. Once they make amends and you have your job back, you may tell them to shove it up their arse. However, you will fight this."

"It's embarrassing you know." She looked into her cup as she stirred it. "It will be like last time, they will look at me like it was my fault. What if they don't believe me?"

"I will sleep in your sitting room this evening, or rather this morning." Severus drank his tea, then setting the cup down looked at her. "You need to learn how to do this better."

"I should hope I will never have to do this again." She sniffed and felt tears slide down her cheek.

"I was speaking of making tea."

"Oh." She smiled thinly. "Let me just grab a pillow and blanket. I sleep on the sofa most of the time. You take the bed. Oh, I forgot," she turned back to him, "are you still taking that potion, the one the elf will bring? Do you have to reset the wards? I can do it for you if you tell me how to alter your old wards."

"No, but yes the elf will bring the new potion I am now taking. The wards will not have to be reset."

"I thought you looked better. Since last time I saw you I mean."

"Thank you, Miss Granger."

"You really do, not as tense." She smiled. "I have a chess board you know. We could play if you would like."

"It is late. I suggest we both try to get some rest."

She nodded and collected her bedding as he walked into the bedroom, closing the door after him.

Hermione could not sleep. She lay awake and thought of the morning. She knew Severus would insist she do this, she did after all work under the name of Snape. He could not let an insult against his wife go unchallenged, even if she was not really his wife. She sighed and rolled over again trying to fall asleep.

She could smell him in her apartment. The smell of men's cologne and the soap and that was undeniably his. She smiled and closed her eyes feeling for the first time since she had moved here, that she was home.

.

.

.

.

Hermione was still in shock as she let Severus hold her elbow and lead her into Gringotts. She had deferred to him as they argued with the manager, trying to appear strong and firm. It was well into the third minute when she crumbled in tears onto Severus's shoulder. He had pulled her tight and stroked her hair.

She knew it was part of the show as surely as she knew Severus would never care for her. At the time she closed her eyes and let herself pretend that he did care, and he did want her near and that his smell was her home.

Now, her eyes were open and she was looking at a check larger than she imagined lying in her hands. She laid it on the marble surface of the teller's window and smiled up at the goblin. Lowering her head, she signed her name, and handed the check to him.

"Severus," she turned quickly and put her hand to the back of her neck frowning at him as she saw his eyes snap up to her face. "Do I have enough for robes and Honeydukes?"

"We have time to shop if you do not take all day," he said as he watched her turn back to the goblin. He cursed himself for being caught staring at the curve of her neck and the slender arch of it.

"Do I need a trim?" She asked him as they left the bank and she ran her hand across her neck again. "I am still not used to getting it cut every few weeks and sometimes it gets a little ragged."

"It is fine," he said, rolling he eyes wondering what was compelling him to want to look at her. "You mentioned robes."

"Yes, Madame Malkin said you had, let's see now, how did she say it?" She laughed at the colour that showed on his normally pallid face. "Exquisite taste. That was it. Could you even make me look exquisite, or is that only for your sexy witches?"

He opened the door to the shop and pushed her in. Dragging her to the back of the shop, he raised his hand and waved Madam Malkin over as he glared at Hermione. He was angry that she had laughed at him yet again, and was determined to call her bluff.

"My wife has need of a new wardrobe Madam. The holidays will be upon us and she needs a couple of dress robes as well as gowns. I am sure you can have them ready in time?"

"Of course, Professor. Shall we provide the entire wardrobe?" She smiled and waved over two workers. "We can leave her for her measurements if you would care to choose the fabrics."

"No, the racks will do just…"

"Madam Snape, as your husband I must insist," he said smoothly, and then turned to Madam Malkin. "She will also need under garments and night wear."

"Just a couple of robes, really, I…" She stopped as she looked at his face. "Yes dear, that would be lovely."

Hermione stood while the assistants passed their wands over her. They had her sit down and did the whole thing again, and then they asked her to remove her clothing.

"No, you have enough to go on." She looked around for Severus.

"Madam Snape, if the gowns do not fit properly he will be … let's say be unkind about the finished project."

"I need him." She pushed her way to the front of the shop. "Severus, I want to leave."

"Madam Snape refuses to disrobe Professor," the assistant said in her defence.

"Severus, please." Hermione grabbed his arm.

"My wife was in the war." He locked his eyes on hers. "She is foolishly ashamed of scars she received while defending this world. Whereas she should be proud she wears them, she chooses instead to hide."

"Madam Snape, I can assure you we have seen many scars. We need to see them to insure the gowns cover them however." Madam Malkin patted her arm. "If you would prefer your husband may come in the changing room with you."

"NO!" she yelled, and ran back to the changing area a scarlet red.

"Shy," he chuckled and shrugged. "Sweet, but shy none the less."

"Is there anything special she needs? Any special occasions?"

"Yes, one. I have been extended a very kind invitation to the Malfoy Manor." He looked back to the changing area. "This will be Mrs. Snape's first appearance of this sort since our wedding. Make sure she has something…appropriate."


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 10**

* * *

Hermione slipped the silver gown over her head and felt it adjust to her body. She gasped in surprise and looked up to the mirror. She turned, trying to look over her shoulder at the back. Seeing the fabric fall from her shoulders and stop just below her waist in a draping fold, then hug her hips before falling to the floor, she wondered at the perfect fit.

Turning to face her image, she studied the person looking back at her. She wore short hair, swept up and pulled over her head to one side, where it was allowed to fall to a gentle wave hugging her cheek. She had on a dusting of make-up, just enough to hide the freckles that sprinkled her nose. She trailed her fingers over the bodice of the gown and frowned at the low cut. Looking back up and looking at her wrinkled brow then thinking that Severus had chosen this for her she smiled.

Tonight she would be fine. He was taking her to a holiday party, she was not sure where, but it was obviously somewhere grand as he had sent this special gown to her.

She was still preening, and putting the last touches to her make-up when she heard him knock and ran to open the door. She pulled back the door and smiled at him, blushing as she felt his eyes wash over her and settle on her bodice.

"Miss… Hermione." He bowed with a flourish and took up her hand, kissing the palm and smirking. "Tonight you will not be mistaken for a child. You are quite lovely, Madame Snape."

"I feel naked." She grinned and turned to collect her cloak only to feel Severus pull her back by the arm.

"I assure you, if you were we would not need a party for a diversion." He pulled her into his chest.

"Severus," she hissed. "Let me go. You smell of whiskey. You don't want to do this."

"We will be visiting some of my oldest friends tonight my dear." He smirked, released her, and pushed into her apartment. "I need you to play a part, perhaps the hardest part you have yet to play."

"What part?" She pressed her back against the door as he paced across her sitting room.

"First of all I have not been drinking." He raised an eyebrow at her look of disgust. "I assure you, Madam Snape, one does not have to drink to smell of whiskey. However, I will be giving that impression tonight."

"Where do you intend to take me?" She swallowed, knowing she would not like the answer.

"Before I tell you, I want you to understand you will be perfectly safe. You will not be out of my sight for a second and you will wear no less than three port keys."

"I know I will be sorry to ask this, but if it is safe why would I need a port key?"

"Good question, Miss Granger."

"Do you plan on answering it?"

"No, I do not believe I will."

"Severus? I asked you a question."

"Fine, come here my dear." He pulled her to his chest and ran his hands over her naked back. "Do not flinch to my touch, do not pull away. Tonight we keep up a ruse in the hopes that we find out who at the Ministry is the spy. It may lead us to Lucius and give us some idea of what he plans. It has taken me almost a year to get in this position. Do not ruin it."

He pushed her away and ran his hand through his hair. "Miss… Hermione, we do this, we must. I have spoken to what is left of the order and they agree, it is time to move in."

"I don't…. I don't know if I can. You make me feel… when you did that … you ..."

"I will be caustic to you, perhaps cruel. I will treat you like a child, a child that happens to be my wife."

"So, nothing out of the ordinary," she said with a smirk.

"Do not mistake what I tell you now for how I have treated you in the past. Tonight Miss Granger you will be going to dinner with a consummate Death Eater."

"Where?" she hissed.

"We are invited to the Malfoy Manor, it seems Narcissa is back in residence and has requested my appearance."

"No, absolutely not. You cannot ask me to do this." She shook her head and hugged her arms around herself. "I want a divorce, or an annulment, or whatever I can get. I will turn in my wand. No, you are crazy. Do you know that? Has anyone ever told you that whenever you look in the mirror you see the mad hatter? I must say this is even more than I would…"

"My godson is still missing Miss Granger. I have taken a year to get in a position to find him. It has been a long hard road, one I do not want to go down again. If I miss this chance, I will not be able to start over. I will lose her trust and will not be invited again."

"Draco? You think you can help him?"

"Yes."

"So, Draco is the only reason to go?"

"No, as I told you, Narcissa will have people there that may prove useful. Lucius is not hiding from you, Hermione, there is much more to this."

"I am scared, don't you understand? I won't be able…"

"I will be there with you. No one will dare touch you with me at your elbow."

"What do I do?"

"Nothing. You hang on my arm and look like you belong there."

"And what do you do?"

"I treat you like a Mudblood whore, one I own only for my amusement."

"That is rather frank."

"You will not carry a wand." He took out a bracelet from his pocket and grabbed her arm. "This port key will be automatically activated in the event I am incapacitated. I do not expect such as event, however I think we should be prepared."

She nodded and allowed him to fasten the clasp, securing it to her wrist. "Severus? Do you have one?"

"No, I left my bracelets at home."

He looked up from her wrist and saw her eyes filling with tears. He sighed and reached into his pocket again and fastened a matching necklace around her throat. Turning her around, he secured the clasp and leaned down, kissing her neck.

"This is how I will treat you. You must not flinch, or move away from me." He put his arm around her waist and pulled her back into him. "Can you do this, Miss Granger? Can you stand to have me touch you?"

She gasped at the tingling of her neck, and the feel of his lips against her skin, forgetting in that moment what he wanted her to do. Forgetting that he only touched her to show his cruelty. She closed her eyes and quickly nodded. Pulling away, she turned back to him and lifted her chin.

"You said three," she said with her voice cracking.

"You are wearing it," he smirked. "If your dress comes undone you disappear."

She turned red and swallowed hard, nodding her head. "You didn't tell me how to activate the necklace."

"No, I did not." He looked at her evenly. "Shall we go, Madam Snape?"

"I don't want to do this, you do know that."

"Yes, Madam, I do." He grabbed her roughly and spun to the Malfoy Manor's gates laughing at the look of surprise on her face. "You really do not think I would lease an apartment that I could not leave from?"

Hermione stood frozen, looking up at the Manor. She had seen it before, and each time it seemed more menacing than the last. Now she looked up at the sprawling building and thought that Azkaban would be more welcoming.

"Take my arm and look up at me, not the house. We are being watched." He put two fingers under her chin and brought her face to his. "Smile, my gods woman, need you look so sour? You are going to a dinner party."

"Sorry." She painted a false smile on her face and tried to make light of it. "I am not used to putting on a smile for the biggest arse I know."

"The gate keeper is coming, no, do not turn. Remember, you are the wife of a Death Eater you do as I tell you, no matter how distasteful. You are part of the trio and therefore despised here. They may delight in baiting you, or wishing to see you humiliated. You can do this, of that I have no doubt, Hermione, or I would not have brought you."

"Right." She spoke through the smile she had kept on her face. "Then why are my knees shaking?"

He put his arm around her waist and pulled her into him, leaning down and crushing his lips to hers. She brought her hands up to his chest, to push him away only to relax as his tongue teased at her lips and gently sought entry. Forgetting it was a role; she opened her mouth for him, and leaned closer.

"Well done Miss Granger," he whispered as he straightened, his eyes searching hers. "I am sure Narcissa is watching and not enjoying what she sees in the least. She needs to be on edge, it helps loosen her tongue."

Hermione nodded and took up his arm, unable to talk. She kept her eyes straight ahead, as the gate opened and they walked up the pavement and steps, wondering how he knew Narcissa was watching. She looked at him from the corner of her eye unable to read what he felt. She was terrified once they reached the door, holding onto his arm so tightly that he used his free hand to loosen her grip.

"Courage, Hermione. Find that Gryffindor backbone you were once so proud of." He leaned close to her ear as if whispering endearments. "We will leave as soon as we are able. As far as you are concerned, you are bored with all this and would rather be home in my bed."

She blushed and looked at him, seeing him smirk she felt like slapping him.

"Severus, my dear, dear Severus." Narcissa seemed to float across the marble floor of the entry hall holding out her hands to him. "I am so glad you came. I have missed you."

"You are beautiful as always my dear." He tossed his robe to the house elf and kissed Narcissa on both cheeks. "I believe you have met my wife."

"Severus, I nearly fainted when I heard. I simply could not believe that old woman would force you into this. We had plans to protect you, several witches were more than happy to help you."

"She has not only taken over the blood traitors position at Hogwarts, but now vies to run the new order that she is planning. I found it prudent to stay on her good side." Severus shrugged and turned to Hermione. "I am sure you are familiar with this piece I was given, you may call her by her first name."

Narcissa gave Hermione a cold look. "Rather common looking isn't she? Even low class if you look closely."

"No one matches you Narcissa," he purred. "She is rather, let us say, useful. And, as a Mudblood she does not care what I do to her, she rather enjoys it, or at least knows better than to complain."

"Oh really Severus, you could have done so much better," Narcissa said as she wrapped herself around his free arm and pulled them forward to the sitting room. "Just a small gathering. In these unsure times I thought it prudent not to trust too many too quickly."

"Will Draco join us?" Hermione asked innocently, looking at the splendour of the sitting room.

"I forget how young your wife is Severus." Narcissa sniffed. "Do manage to keep her quiet and teach her to keep her tongue."

Severus turned to Hermione and raised his eyebrow. "If I may have a moment alone Narcissa I will take care of this problem."

Narcissa laughed as she sauntered away, leaving them alone. Severus held Hermione's arm tightly as he spun her around to face him. Leaning toward her, he lowered his mouth to her ear.

"I am sorry for this. I thought you would know better than to mention him. Forgive me." He stood up and brought his hand across her face hard enough to stagger her back. She would have fallen if he had not been holding her with his free hand.

He reached out and took her other arm pulling her back to him, again leaning down to her ear. "Hermione, do not cry, do not show your anger. Gods Hermione, do this, they are watching."

She ran her tongue through her mouth tasting blood, too shocked to talk. She swallowed hard and looked up at him through a blur of tears opening her mouth, and then clapped it shut.

"Why?" she whispered. She tried to pull her arms free of his vice like grip.

Leaning down again, as he looked up through his lashes to the room behind her, he hissed in her ear.

"He may still be here, I feel it. Now smile and kiss me."

"What? After that you expect me …"

She saw his face grow dark and the pressure on her arms increase as she lifted her head and sobbed into his mouth.

"Say nothing unless I tell you it is safe to speak."

"You could have said something before. You could have mentioned that I am not allowed to talk." She winced as he brought one finger to her swollen cheek. She saw the concern that laced his eyes, and knew at this moment that she was in more danger than he had alluded to.

He spun her back to the sitting room and pulled her along with him. Hermione left her arm wrapped around Severus', as she kept her eyes to the floor and pressed her lips together to keep still. She was afraid. Afraid that at any moment a sound would escape her, or that she would be unable to stop her knees from giving up their fight to hold her.

Severus guided her to the dining table and held out a seat for her. She looked at him, scared to even for a moment release his arm until she saw him nod at her. Stepping forward she sat down and finally was able to forget her knees long enough to look around the table at the small grouping.

Narcissa sat to the left of the one she had introduced as Douglas, Douglas Nott she had said. Hermione looked at him and saw the Nott features but could not place the name. She thought it strange that he sat in the position of host but was unable to ask Severus what this meant. She felt Severus as he slid into the seat next to her, glancing up at the other two couples, cursing herself for not listening closer to their names. Her mind raced and memories flooded in on her, making the simple chore of listening difficult. The witch with the blond hair she remembered as Christina, and she thought the other was called Emily, or Emma.

She felt Severus reach his arm over to her and looked up to see him offer her a glass of wine. She saw it was his glass as hers still sat in front of her, and took it with trembling fingers.

"How sweet Severus. Tasting her food now?" Narcissa chided him.

"Not at all Cissy, she is allowed only half a glass." He calmly picked up Hermione's drink and set it front of himself.

Narcissa pulled out a wand and flicked it at his glass, changing the dark wine that had sat in front of Hermione to amber whiskey.

"I know you would much prefer this," she laughed. "I do think you are overprotective of the witch."

"I protect what is mine, until I am done with it." He raised his glass to Narcissa and threw it back in one swallow as the dinner began to appear.

"You will have to excuse the poor service. It seems several of our elves are currently in service at our other properties. With the holidays it is difficult to know where I will be from day to day."

"I am sorry Cissy. I should have said something before now." Severus reached over and removed Hermione's plate. "She eats once a day. If I indulge her she tends to become a little… shall I say hippy."

"Rather like that, what was her name? Rachel? Was it not?" Narcissa frowned at him. "Yes, I believe that one you fancied _was_ rather hippy. What became of her Severus?"

"I do believe Lucius was not happy with her." Hermione heard the change in his voice, and watched him from the corner of her eye. "She was buried up at the cemetery near Little Hangleton I do believe."

"Yes, I do believe you are right. Now, please eat. Enjoy."

Hermione sucked air into her lungs and fought not to reach out and grab his arm. She raked her memory and could find nothing attached to a Rachel but thought of the tall willowy witch she had seen on Christmas Eve years before. She looked to her lap, listening to the rest of the rather mundane conversation and the sound of silver on china glad when the final course came.

"Now, you men may have your bandy while we women retire to the sitting room." Narcissa stood as did the other witches.

Hermione blanched, and turned to Severus.

"You may keep the Mudblood with you Severus. I really do not want her in the rest of the house. You know, you really must do something about her, get rid of her." She turned and swept out of the room.

"If I remember correctly the bar is well-stocked." Severus rose and walked to the liquor cabinet, opening it and surveying the contents.

"Brandy is fine," Douglas walked up behind him, followed by the two that had dinner with them.

"Frank, whiskey?" Severus held up a glass to the tall thin wizard.

"Of course, a much better brew than I stock myself I might add."

"Jonathon?" He handed the third a glass as well.

They held their glasses and slowly made their way back to the table, discussing Quidditch scores and the upcoming games. Sitting at the table Severus leaned back, tipping his chair on two legs and rubbing circles on Hermione's back.

Leaning forward he reached over and lowed her gown on her shoulder, revealing the side swell of her breast, the bent forward and ran his mouth over her skin. "Please, gentlemen, relax. We have no ladies present, feel free to light up."

Douglas laughed as he reached in his pocket and brought out his cigar, as did the other two.

"You know Cissy will have our hides," Jonathon laughed heartedly.

"Nothing a little cleaning spell will not take care of." Severus' hand languidly stroked Hermione's neck and shoulder, pushing the strap lower, until the gown threatened to fall and expose her completely.

He watched her closely as she squeezed her eyes closed and waited until her head snapped up and she lost all colour.

"I am bored with this," Severus stood, "come gentlemen a trip to Knockturn is in order."

He turned to Hermione and with two loud claps of his hands, her port key activated and she was gone.


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 11**

* * *

Hermione gasped as she found herself on the cold hard stones in the dungeon chambers that attached to his. She reached for her shoulder and pulled up the gown as tears began to form. Standing and looking around she saw the door to his chambers still sealed and ran to the door leading to the hallway to find it locked as well as warded.

She turned to the floo, stumbling on her high heels, grabbing a hand full of powder and stopped. She was not sure of where to go, but knowing she had to flee, the threw down the powder and called out for Minerva's office. The green flash never came.

"Fuck," she stormed, stepping back out and stomping her foot. He had sent her here and locked her in. She turned the chair to the fireplace and flopped down, crossing her arms and frowning. Then she pulled up her legs, wrapped her arms around them, resting her head on her knees, and began her wait. Eventual she lay her head down on the arm of the chair , curled into a ball and tried to find the darkness that she thought would be there for her.

She woke hours later to the sound of someone stumbling about. Sitting up quickly she saw Severus lurch forward, grab a small table and manage to stay upright while going down on one knee. His breaths were ragged and loud, as if he had been running a long distance.

"Professor?" She stared at him and stood, taking a tentative step toward him.

He turned a haggard face up to her as he fumbled for his wand, all the while keeping his other hand firmly clasped to the table for support. Flicking it toward the floo, he lowered his head to his chest again.

"Leave. It is open now." He dropped his wand, clutching his side as he tried to rise.

"You are hurt."

"Obviously."

She hurried over to him and pulled back his cloak, looking at where he clutched himself and saw the spreading circle of dark blood.

"Let me see," she said softly. "Maybe I can help."

"I told you to leave. You are safe for now."

"Or what Professor?" She stood and grabbed the arm he had grasped to the table. "I don't think you are in much of a condition to fight me right now."

She pulled him up, hooking his arm around her shoulder, ignoring his moan. She saw his eyes search the floor and smirked as she kicked the wand further away as she half carried him to the sofa and let him fall into it, unable to support his weight any longer.

He threw his head back and hissed. "Please," he wheezed, "no more help. Fuck. Pain potion… in my quarters."

She saw the blood coming faster and ran to the floo, dropped to her knees and screamed for Poppy. After sobbing out that Severus needed her, Hermione pulled herself out of the way to let Poppy rush through and hurry to Severus.

"Girl," Poppy's voice was stern and commanding. "In the bed chamber, the one you use, the panel to the left of the floo, it opens, bring me the vials."

Poppy ripped open Severus robes only to find another layer of waistcoat and shirt. Using her wand she divested him of them and looked at the obviously Muggle stab wound.

"Good," she whispered and patted his hand. "You will be fine in no time. It is Muggle and will heal cleanly."

She passed her wand over the wound, first repairing the spleen, then the tissue surrounding it, eventually closing the top layers of skin. Taking the potions from Hermione, she poured three into his mouth before sitting down next to him.

"You fool boy," she slapped the back of his head. "There was no need to come back here. The students are all gone for the hols. You should have come directly to me."

"Habit." He took a deep breath and raised his head to look down at his side. "Thank you Poppy. When I left I couldn't think beyond coming here."

"I am afraid it may scar."

Severus snorted a laugh and grimaced as he tried to sit up straighter.

Hermione looked to the wound and noticed for the first time the number of scars that crisscrossed the rest of his chest and stomach. Biting her bottom lip, she looked up to his face to find him watching her.

"Do I need to perform a memory charm, Miss Granger? Or may I count on your discretion?"

Hermione nodded her head. "You can count on my discretion sir. You can trust me."

"Fine, Poppy, tend to her face. I am afraid she has met with an unfortunate accident."

Poppy stood and peered at Hermione, touching a finger to the face and running her wand over her cheek.

"Well, it is not broken at least." She flicked her wand and the swelling and pain was gone. "There child, all done. It will be sore for a couple of days but it cannot be seen."

"Poppy," Severus said, struggling to sit up. "Minerva need not know of this. It was merely a little fight in Knockturn. Nothing of importance."

"You took her to Knockturn?" Poppy pointed at Hermione angrily.

"No, I have been back hours, Poppy, really."

Poppy looked down at Hermione's dress and raised an eyebrow. "Hours you say?"

"She is my wife," Severus sniggered. "She spent the night. Alone."

"Fine," Poppy stormed as she headed for the floo. "I will say nothing. If she asks I will not lie to her, so just hope she does not get wind of this elsewhere."

"Severus?" Hermione knelled in front of him. "Are you alright now? Really?"

"Professor, you should continue to address me as Professor." He leaned forward and traced her jaw line with his thumb. "In a couple of hours all trace will be gone, just a little soreness will remain."

"What happened back there?" She asked pulling back from him and sitting on her heels.

"You told me who was with Lucius."

He grabbed the arm of the sofa with both hands and hauled himself up, looking around for his wand. Hermione quickly picked it up, handed to him, and waited until he opened the passage to his own quarters before standing.

"I told you? How could I? I don't even know."

"When you heard him laugh your skin got ice cold, and the smell of his cigar was making you sick, I could feel the change in you, the tenseness just under the skin." He looked at her evenly. "He poses no further threat Miss Granger."

"You…you…?"

"Enough. We will not speak of him again. Do not be so foolish as to think this had anything to do with you. There are factors you know nothing of." He walked quickly to his side of the passage and straight to his whiskey. "I plan to get quite drunk Miss Granger. I suggest you leave."

Hermione walked to the floo and grabbed a handful of powder ready to step into the fireplace.

"Miss Granger."

She turned back to him. "How I treated you, when I hit you and … the other. I am sincerely sorry. I hope in time you will be able to forgive me."

She nodded and stepped backwards into the floo, throwing down the powder and returning to her apartment. She did not hear the glass as he flung it, shattering it into the fireplace, spreading fine shards of glass onto the hearth.

Hermione scrubbed herself in the shower, feeling dirty and smelling of the cigar and Narcissa's dining room. She leaned her forehead on the cool tiles and tried to put together what had happened and why. She shuddered, remembering the feel of the slap across the face and then the way he had gently caressed her shoulder and kissed the swell of her breast.

Lifting up her face to the showerhead it dawned on her that the slap and the gentle kiss were the same. Both done, not in anger, or in lust, but to control her, and make her act as he wanted for a purpose. She stepped out of the shower, walked to the mirror and cleared a circle of fog with the palm of her hand.

She meant nothing to him. Yet she had wanted to. For just that one day, just that one time she had wished it meant more. Now she saw the entire ruse for what it was and knew that he was only as kind or as cruel as he needed to be. She looked into the cleared circle of the mirror. She brought her fist up, smashing the side of it against the mirror three times until it finally broke, and then laughed that she could not even do this right at the first try.

Dressing she hurried to St. Mungo's for her monthly counselling session knowing she could not say anything about what had happened, thinking it foolish to sit and pretend she was talking about her fears when they could not be spoken of.

As she left the hospital, she headed for Flourish and Blotts. She had worked there two months now and knew that as the newest employee she would be the one to work over the hols. Tonight she would lock the doors and restock the shelves for tomorrow's sale. She enjoyed the nights she was alone in the shop, surrounded my nothing but books and old scrolls.

If she were lucky, she would finish early and enjoy an hour or two of reading books she could no longer afford, or have use of the unrestricted floo. She pulled out her expense sheet as she walked down the pavement frowning. She needed to cut even more costs than she had before. Her Gringotts account was substantial by her standards, but Severus had made it clear she was not to touch it for foolish things.

Tucking the parchment back in her pocket, she wondered if taking dinner to work was foolish. She rolled her eyes and pushed the door open knowing she would wait until morning to fix her own breakfast at home.

She opened the last crate of books, reading the instructions for special handling on the invoice and smiled when she saw she could use levitation spells to fly them to the shelves. The last four cases had taken hours to put up. She carried them one at a time, not able to place them together on the shelves, and feed them before putting them at different points around the store.

Why anyone would give their child a book as a familiar was beyond her. Better a cat or a toad if you had to feed something.

After levitating the books and making sure everything was in order she hurried to the floo and fell on her knees.

"Draco," she whispered. "Are you there, hurry I only have a couple of minutes."

"Hermione?" His face came into view. "Are you sure you are not being watched?"

"No, I am at work, completely alone. Do you need anything?"

"I am bored out of my mind Hermione. I appreciate all the books you have sent but I don't think I can read them one more time."

"I'll see what I can do." She looked back over her shoulder to the clock. "Draco, the wizard with your father, the other one, Douglas something, he is dead, I can't remember his last name."

"How? Does the Ministry…"

"Listen, I can't tell you. I don't know the details. I still don't know about your father."

"No one does. Was it Douglas McMaster?"

"It was Mc or Mac something, I can't remember. Narcissa is back at the Manor, you have to get out of there."

"Where to Hermione? Any suggestions? With no galleons it is hard, and I cannot very well waltz into Gringotts. Anyway, she never comes down here. The elf you send is working out fine."

"Almost two years, Draco you must …" she looked back to the door. "I have to go. Just make sure you are careful when you go out, remember the glamour, I 'll send more money come payday. But listen, Snape knows you are there."

"Snape? How …."

Hermione stood up, breaking the connection and began dusting the shelves when the sound of the door opening came to her.

"Well, good job, Mrs Snape," her supervisor looked around not seeing any crates left. "I am surprised. I thought I would find you still feeding those bloody books."

"It took a while, and I found out they do not like carrots." She grinned at him as he scowled at the floor.

"Is that why the floor is orange?"

Hermione shrugged and slipped her wand back up her sleeve. "I tried to clean it but it seems to be impervious to charms."

"I'll get Brian to clean it up. I know tomorrow is your day off, Hermione, but it is Christmas Eve and I could give you some extra hours."

"Well," she bit her lip and grinned at him. "Trade?"

"Get the book, Hermione." He shook his head as she ran to the potions section. "You know he has been looking at the every time he comes in here."

"I know." She smiled and hugged the book close to her chest. "I will owe you a week more, I know that."

"How about half day on Sundays until it is paid off? That will take you almost to the end of February."

"Sounds good. I was wondering about those books in the bag behind the counter, the returned and damaged ones. If you need to get rid of them, you are just tossing them in the bin anyway…"

"Take 'em." He looked at her strangely. "Why you would want them with full access to that library up at the school is beyond me."

"Crookshanks, my cat. They keep him off the good ones. I just leave one of these lying around."

"See you tomorrow, Hermione," he laughed at her.

"Thanks." She grabbed her cloak and throwing it over her shoulders headed for the door.


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 12**

* * *

Hermione woke early the next day. It was Christmas Eve and the shops all along the alley would be full. She intended to make her way to the grocery before work and hurried to dress. She had taken to shoving a piece of fruit in her pocket for lunch and fixing a big meal when she returned for the evening, but today she was skipping breakfast and thought she may stop by Honeydukes as a special treat.

She was glad it was not crowded yet, but knew as soon as the snow stopped the crowds would begin. She pushed open the door, looking up in surprise as the normal bell jingled out a Christmas tune instead.

"Wife's idea that." Hank jerked his head toward the door. "Fool nonsense if you ask me."

"What do you have that's good today Hank?" Hermione peered into the glass Deli case.

"Not much afraid… with Christmas and all. Don't have no sandwiches and such today."

"Oh." Hermione chewed her bottom lip. "Do you have any of those pasties left?"

"Yep, frozen ones."

"Good, give me two of those and a plate of the assorted cheese." She smiled and picked up a package of biscuits and a bag of potato chips. She took the bag from him and signed the receipt.

"Don't know where you put it girl. My wife eats half of what you do and she is twice as big."

Hermione looked up at him and grinned. "I'm going to tell on you Hank. You know half the wizards in the Alley would be more than glad to take her off your hands."

He looked back over his shoulder and turned to her with a smirk. "Don't go let her hear that, got to keep her on her toes."

"Here, I have twenty galleons to put on my account." Hermione put the coin on the counter and watched as he swept it into his drawer.

"You could wait till the end of the month, like always. It is just a little higher than the limit, but that's okay, you always pay."

"Yeah, and with still a week to go, just put this on it. Happy Christmas Hank," she called before going out to the street. "And save some of that sausage for me tomorrow."

She had a hard time working that day, between looking at the clock and listening to screaming children she was more than ready to leave when the time came. Running across the way and up three flights of stairs, she hurried to change and floo off to Hogwarts. She changed into a simple skirt and blouse, knowing Severus was not one that celebrated or dressed festively. Grabbing the book she had wrapped in dark green paper and a silver ribbon, she stepped into the floo and shouted out her destination.

She lit the candles in her side of the chambers with a simple _Lumos, _suddenly becoming uncertain of what she was doing here. Should she go out to the hallway and walk down to his door, or would knocking on the passage be enough?

She bit her lip and thought of the stern Professor before tossing her cloak on the bed and heading to the hallway. Better to be overly formal with him than not formal enough. She knocked on his door and heard his footfalls approach the door as she looked up to where he should appear.

"Miss… Mrs Snape, this is a surprise." He looked at her coldly, folding his arms across his chest.

"Mrs Snape," she repeated raising her eyebrow. She saw him flinch, as her eyes happened to see over his shoulder where they rested on a tall willowy witch. She thought of a witch named Rachel and looked back at him quickly, seeing the coldness on his face.

"I am sorry." She stepped back and to the side so as not to be in sight. "I didn't think to … I didn't know you would have company."

"What may I do for you?" He looked down at her with a smirk.

"Nothing, here," she shoved the gift in his hand, "I wanted to drop this by, but I am in a hurry so, I have plans. So….I'll just run along now."

She turned and walked away, using long strides to avoid running, cursing her stupidity. Of course, he would have company. It was Christmas Eve. Every one would be with someone. She had no right to think he would be alone. This new witch suited him, tall and thin with straight hair and curves she dressed to show. She hurried into her portion on the chambers, grabbed her cloak and ran back into the floo not turning as he called to her.

Stepping out in her apartment, she rolled her eyes as she felt her cheeks flush. _How stupid_, she thought. She should have flooed, or at least sent an owl instead of just assuming he would be alone.

She was throwing her cloak down when the floo activated and he stepped through.

"Miss Granger, did you not hear me? I feel I owe you an explanation…"

"Listen, I have plans, I need to change and get ready." She turned to him biting her bottom lip and jutting her chin up. "I am in a hurry."

"I am sorry, perhaps another time," he said, nodding to her and stepping back into the floo.

Walking to the kitchen, she put on a pot of water for tea and opened the cupboard hoping to find something of dinner. She had no desire to walk through the gathering snow and hope that the grocery had something left in the deli. Grabbing a box of biscuits she poured her tea and settled onto the sofa with a book she had already read four times.

.

.

.

March came gently that year. Warm and welcomed. Hermione had taken to wearing only her light robes, as it was such a short walk to the bookshop. The heavy winter robes and cloaks needed special cleaning to protect the magically sewn seams and she was trying to save as much as she could.

She walked up the stairs and reached for the knob before feeling the absence of the wards. She stepped back, sliding her wand out of her sleeve and stepped to the side, as the door flung open and Severus stepped out.

"Bloody hell, Snape, you could have warned me. I was ready to come in throwing hexes."

He stepped back and let her enter before locking the door and throwing up wards, and scowling at the use of his name in her greeting.

"Draco has need seen."

She sat down heavily on the sofa, quickly pulling up her defences. "Where?"

"Narcissa claims he was just outside the Manor."

"Narcissa?"

"Has he tried to contact you?"

"Tried to contact me?"

"Miss Granger, you are doing it again."

She looked up at him and chewed on her lip. "How would I know? I mean no. He has not contacted me. But, if he was tying, and couldn't, how would I know?"

Severus looked at her thoughtfully, and nodded. "I am sorry Miss Granger, I had to make sure."

"Professor, when we went to the Manor you said that Draco was there. How would you know that?"

"I felt his magic, Miss Granger. It is very distinctive."

"If you felt it, why didn't Narcissa?"

"Narcissa is a mystery. I do not know if she ever truly followed the Dark Lord, of if she did it at Lucius' request. Then again, perhaps she was the one to bring Lucius to the Dark Lord. I believe that at one time she cared very much for Draco. However, I am now at a loss." He looked at her evenly. "I am not sure she would recognize him if she felt his magic any longer."

"Where does she stand? I mean, he is her son. Would she just, I don't know, would she just give him over to Lucius?"

"Yes, Miss Granger, she would."

"Would Lucius hurt him? I know he is hiding, and you seem …"

"Miss Granger, Lucius Malfoy would do anything to reach his goal. I believe him to be truly insane. Do not confuse your definition of father with Lucius Malfoy, trust me, he is anything but."

"How do you figure into all this? I know you were his head of house, and his teacher, but there must be more to it."

"Draco is my godson." He sat across from her and ran his fingers through his hair. Leaning forward in his chair and resting his arms on his legs, he told her the story of Draco's birth, and they way he had watched over the boy since. He explained that taking the oath to save Draco if he failed to kill Albus was the hardest thing he had done, but had not regretted it. He explained the almost giddy relief he had felt when the Headmaster made him promise the same.

They sat together a long time, until the shadows and grown long and Severus had cast a Lumos lighting the candles. She told him of growing up in London, and he told her of Spinners End. They talked through two pots of tea, and Hermione got up to put on a third.

"Miss Granger, he is the only one I consider family. He is the only one left I would lay down my life for. Do you understand?"

"If you find him, what happens? Can you hide him?"

"Yes. I still have Spinners End, and although Lucius knows of it, he has never been there. I could make it un-plottable preventing him from finding it. A better solution may be to move him into the quarters set up for … for my wife. There is also a small cottage on the northern coast I could use."

"You could promise he would he safe? That you could take care of what he needs?"

He looked at her strangely. "Yes, I do believe he would be safe."

She looked down at the sink as she ran the tap water, then turned off the water and turned back to him.

"I need to use the floo. You need to open the connection."

"Miss Granger?"

"He will be wondering why I have not sent his dinner with the elf anyway. So, I know he will be there waiting."

"You? You know where … you are his Secret Keeper?"

"Yes, now he has two."

He stood and looked at her incredulously before grabbing her by the arms and pulling her roughly to him.

"How long did you plan on keeping this from me?" he seethed, holding her by the arms tightly and shaking her.

"I don't know." She struggled to free herself.

"He could have been killed, you fool, you bint." He shoved her away from him, letting her fall back against the sink.

"Why? Why would you wait so long?"

She jumped up and ran to the hallway intent on reaching her wand, trying to get away from him, only to him catch her again and push her to the wall.

"Answer me."

"I don't know."

"Say it, tell me."

"I don't know."

"Miss Granger, this is becoming familiar, now tell me."

"Let me go."

"Answer me, why did you wait?"

"I… I need to go."

"Now!"

"Because, because I didn't trust you. I didn't trust anyone, not you, not Minerva, no one."

He let her go and stepped back, dropping his hands and turning away from her. He leaned his hands on the table, putting his weight on his arms and wiling himself to be calm.

He turned his lowered head and looked at her, as she stood leaning back on the sink. She looked small and suddenly fearful of him, at the same time he saw her hand inch toward the teapot. He smirked, knowing her intention, and then stood to move his head further from her.

"The books, when you bought two the same, they were for him?"

She nodded, then brought her hand back and wiped it across her eyes.

"That is why you did not send an elf to the library?"

Again, she only nodded.

"The grocery, the account big enough for a family of four, you are feeding him?"

She nodded again, squeezing her eyes closed to stop her tears. She felt his arms pull her to him and his hand hold her head against his chest. She let her tears run down her cheeks and she sobbed into him.

"I didn't trust you. I'm sorry, but I couldn't do it before. You have no idea how hard this has been."

"Where is he?"

"Umm, well see …I once heard that hiding in plain sight was the best."

She felt as much as heard his sigh, then felt his chuckle slowly build. "Merlin, he is in the Manor."

He pulled her back and stared at her. "Tell me this is a joke, Hermione. Please tell me you didn't do this."

"No and yes. It's sort of like hiding something in plain sight. Only not exactly. He is in the dungeons under the east wing. If we go to Hogwarts, and you open the floo I will get him to come through. I don't feel safe letting him come here."

"How have you managed to do this?" He flopped on a chair and stared at her.

"Well, it was much easier at Hogwarts. The kitchen never missed an extra meal, and the house elf would just bring an extra one to me when I ordered. The hard part was making everyone think I needed to stay there. That part was bloody awful."

"The story of needing an open floo to get out…"

"Really Professor," she smiled and sat down opposite him. "I still don't believe you or Minerva bought that one. Bloody hell, how stupid do you think I am? No, I needed it to send things through, and Draco needed a way out. Even so, there are so many floos at Hogwarts I found it easy."

"He was in Hogwarts?"

"Just during the summers. I would never risk it when term was in."

He leaned back and looked at her as if she were someone else. "Miss Granger, I must say you are the last person I would have suspected of helping him. I am surprised you not only managed it but were not found out."

"Sort of like hiding in plain sight right?" She smiled and got up to finish the tea. "It has been a lot harder here. I had to juggle the accounts and forget to keep a list of what I bought. I do have a confession. I need to tell you something that I guess should be bothering me."

She set the fresh tea on the table and began pouring it into the beakers. "It is about the rent."

"Yes, Miss Granger, do go on." Severus had not taken the smirk off his face since she had started her explanation.

"Well, I talked to a couple of people in the building and you were paying more than anyone else. I think it is the whole, he has the Order of Merlin and he is a Potions Master thing, you know."

"No, Miss Granger, I do not believe I do."

"They think you are rich. That and there is a matter of your past associations. No one likes you. I spoke to the landlord, and threatened to sue. It was your idea really, you know like when you told me to fight at that job I had. Anyway I did. He reduced the rent. I think I may have overplayed the whole Death Eater thing."

"I am still paying … I see."

"That is the part that was bothering me. I kept letting you pay the higher amount, reducing what I was paying. So, if you want to let me know how much I owe you and just take it out of my Gringotts' account that is fine."

She drank her tea waiting for him to say something, only hearing the ticking of the clock and the dripping of the faucet.

"Listen, Professor. It was not all an act, not the part about … things like being scared of patrol and waking up at night screaming. I am still dealing with that, there are times when I walk home from work and think Lucius is watching me. Closed or lock rooms are the worse. However, it is getting better. I go days without thinking about it."

"Helping Draco must have been difficult for you," he said softly.

"That's the funny part. It hasn't been. Ever since our sixth year, he has changed. I know what they forced him to do, but the key word here is forced. He is caught between, Professor. What is he to do? I know his father is cruel and heartless, perhaps he is insane like you say, but he is still Draco's father, and I don't think he knows how to deal with that. If it wasn't for Draco I would be dead, I know that."

"Hermione, did Draco not trust me? Did you really think I would harm either one of you?" He looked at her seeking an answer. She knew at that moment he needed to hear the truth more than he had needed to know where his godson was.

"He told me I should trust you, and that you were not as you appeared. But, until the dinner at the Manor I guess I didn't believe that you could do the things you do and still care for someone." She bit her lip and locked her eyes on his. "I mean, well… I know you worked as a spy during the war… I thought I knew what they forced on you, but I never gave a thought to what it did to you. I think I see it now. Severus, that morning you came back and flooed into your old chambers, the ones I was in, why didn't you go directly to Poppy?"

He stood and carried his cup to the sink then returned to the table, still not answering her question. He stood watching her, and then held out his hand to help her up.

"Miss… Hermione, I will feel much better when he is out of there and you are free of this responsibility. If you will be so kind as to return to Hogwarts with me I will take him off your hands."


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 13**

* * *

Hermione heard the owl insistently tapping on her window before her alarm clock even went off. She raised her head, looked at the windowsill and saw a small brown barn owl ricocheting its beak on the glass. Tempted to throw her shoe, she pulled herself up and shuffled over to the window, pulling it open and grabbing the missive from its leg.

"Don't look at me like that." She frowned at it as she pushed it off the ledge. "You expect a treat? Deliver at a reasonable hour."

She grabbed her robe and made it out to the kitchen pouring last night's tea in a cup and looking down at it. Gods, she thought, I am never drinking again.

She drank the cold tea with a shudder, amazed to feel her head swim as if drunk again. Grabbing the edge of the table, she pulled herself up and made it to the loo in just enough time to lose it again. She brushed her teeth, stumbled back to bed, turned off the alarm and fell back asleep.

It was mid-morning before the pounding on her door started. First, she thought she would just wait long enough for whoever it was to leave, then she thought she would give them a piece of her mind for causing such a raucous. Pulling on her robe and grabbing her wand, she made it to the door as the wards came down and a fuming Severus stormed into the room.

"You did not answer my owl." He crossed his arms and glared at her.

"It was still dark out. I haven't read it yet," she walked to the door and held it open for him. "So sorry to see you go."

"Gods woman, look at you." He looked at her hair and then down to her feet. "Do something."

"Fine," she walked to her bedroom, shut the door, threw up wards and went back to bed.

She was dozing off when her floo activated and he stepped out into her room. Pulling the pillow over her head, she groaned for him to go away only to have the blankets suddenly ripped off and dumped on the floor.

"Snape, I am in no mood for you."

"Good, since I had not planned on bedding you. We have an inspector coming. Now get your arse up."

"What?" She bolted out of bed and grabbed her robe as the room began to swim. "When?"

They heard a knock on the outer door.

"Now," he hissed at her.

"Fuck," she whispered.

"No time. Answer the door, Mrs.. Snape."

"Quick, take of your robes."

"Hermione, I already told you …"

"You have to look like you live here you git."

She grabbed her wand and divested him of his outer robes, and started out to the sitting area, turning back she rid him of his waist coast leaving him in trousers and shirt. She looked up to his surprised face, and with a smirk, he lost his shoes as well.

Hurrying to the door, she threw it open and smiled widely.

"Mrs. Giles! It has been a while hasn't it?" Hermione wrapped an arm around the witch's and walked to the sofa with her. Sitting down next to her and smiling.

"I had hoped to find you both at home," Mrs. Giles snipped as she pulled her questionnaire from her pocket, sniffing the air and looking at Hermione suspiciously.

"Oh we are both here," Hermione smiled coyly, and then hiccupped. "We were busy."

"Busy? I am so sorry to have disturbed you."

Hermione saw Severus standing in the doorway attempting to retain some dignity in his bare feet and no outer robes.

She winked at Mrs. Giles, "Nothing we can't (hiccup) finish later, if you understand what I mean." (hiccup)

"Oh, here he is," she said too loudly, and winced at the sound reverberating in her skull. She waved to Severus, making Mrs. Giles turn her head to look at him. "Dear, (hiccup) Mrs. Giles from the Ministry just dropped in. Be a sweetheart, do up your trousers (hiccup) and make some tea."

Severus glared at her as he turned and headed for the kitchen.

"So, Mrs. Snape, three years now and still…"

"Listen, can we (hiccup) make this quick. It is my fertile time and we really need to get busy."

They both turned to the kitchen as the sound of breaking china came to them. (hiccup)

"Such a butter fingers. (hiccup) Sometimes I don't know how he manages to brew a decent potion. Of course I prefer (hiccup) to buy my own from a little shop down the way, I don't know that I trust his." (hiccup)

"Are you well Mrs. Snape? You look a little peaked." Mrs.. Giles looked at Hermione with concern, leaning closer and sniffing.

"No, (hiccup) no. Just fine. Don't know what is wrong. (hiccup) Why, I have spent the last three days in bed, "she said with a wink and a smirk. "I have felt like this since morning tea. Oh my, I do hope he uses (hiccup) the right tin this time."

"Mrs. Snape, perhaps as you said, this is a bad time. I will come back when it is more convenient."

"Oh, are you sure? (hiccup) He will be so disappointed. He just put on (hiccup) the pot."

"Yes Mrs. Snape, quite sure."

Hermione walked her to the door. (hiccup) After closing it, she leaned her forehead against the wood and sighed. (hiccup)

"Miss Granger, that has to be the fasted inspection she has ever done."

"You should have (hiccup) warned me."

"I did, I sent an owl." He smirked at her, enjoying her suffering.

"You should have sent your (hiccup) own owl. At least I would have recognized it."

He turned and padded back into the kitchen.

"It doesn't work as well without the boots (hiccup) Professor. You can't spin and stomp in your bare feet."

She followed him into the kitchen and pulled down the window shade.

"Long night, Miss Granger?" The corner of his mouth turned up as he watched her chin jerked up each time she hiccupped.

"You might (hiccup) say that," she looked up at weakly. "You wouldn't happen to have a potion (hiccup) on you? No? Thought not."

She laid her head on the table as he loudly slammed her (hiccup) beaker in front of her.

"Good gods Severus, why did you never give a lecture (hiccup) on hangover potion?"

"I have never known anyone with a hangover to be in the position of brewing."

"I am." (hiccup)

"Visions of a cat come to me, and not the two legged one in the Headmaster's office. It was a tabby if I remember correctly."

"Speaking of old times Professor, (hiccup) how 'bout I set you on fire?"

"I always thought that was you."

"Not going to (hiccup) give me a break are you?"

"No Miss Gran…"

"That's it. I am sitting here with nothing on but a night (hiccup) gown and robe. You are wearing only trousers, a shirt, and I assume boxers. At least leave me some dignity and just (hiccup) call me Hermione."

"I find that most…"

"Don't say it Severus, I have not (hiccup) even had a cockroach in this apartment to be inappropriate in front of."

"I was about to say that I find that most acceptable."

"Nice pick up." (hiccup)

"I practice."

She grinned at him, then grabbed her head (hiccup) and put it on the table.

Severus walked into the floo and returned in less than five minutes, giving her a potion and stood back with his arms crossed as she drank it.

"Thanks. Gods, she's going to put down that I stink of beer." She handed back the empty vial. "Now, we were talking of Draco."

"When?"

"Severus, I am having a hard time here, just go along with me."

"Hermione, I am not at liberty to speak of him. I can tell you that Narcissa is having a garden party I plan on attending and …"

"No, not again. Last time you almost died and I had a sore jaw for a week. Fuck off Snape. I am not doing that again."

He sat at the table and leaned forward to talk to her. "Kingsley knows where Lucius hides, only he's not hiding any longer. For the past few months he has been seen out quite often, always in the presence of a rather beautiful witch. It seems he is free to do as he pleases in France.

"Narcissa is with him?"

"No, her name is Gretchen, Gretchen Krause. She is from Germany, but is now working for the French Ministry of Magic. It would seem that he has left Narcissa."

"Left her?" she whispered in shock. Divorce and separation in the wizard world was impossible. Only annulment was recognized.

"You are no longer getting the Daily Prophet delivered I take it."

Hermione could only shake her head. "No, I dropped it to save money and never picked up a new subscription."

"You are a mystery. I can pay the rent but you draw the line at spending my money on a paper."

"I do have scruples you know."

"It appears when Lucius decided to hide for a while, Douglas decided he wanted a little more than just power. He wanted the Malfoy fortune and went through Narcissa to get it. When it was discovered that she and Douglas were having an affair, Lucius established himself in France where wizarding laws are much more lax."

"He would divorce her?" Hermione looked at him wide eyed. "How did Lucius even find out, I mean my gods, Douglas has been dead a long time now."

Severus smirked at her as he leaned back comfortably on is chair. "Lucius was never a real forward thinking person. His wards were always set to allow Narcissa to find him. Her owl would naturally be able to find him, no matter who wrote the letter attached."

"You are quite the bastard aren't you?" she grinned at him. "Hey, it's our anniversary this weekend. How about letting me buy you dinner?"

"If I remember correctly I still owe you a Christmas gift. I shall take you."

"Christmas? It is still three months away."

He leaned forward, leaning his arms on the table. "I was speaking of last year Hermione. The book you bought, a very expensive book. I should not have taken her to my chambers. I never stopped to think what it would look like."

"Severus, I have no claim on you. I am sure that it looked just like what it was." She stood up and walked to the door. "I should have owled, or floo-ed before showing up, I just … I don't know. Listen, I'm getting dressed. Put on some more tea and I will restore your robes as soon as I am done."

Hermione closed her bedroom door and leaned against it, lifting up her hand and holding it horizontally in front of her face she sighed to see it tremble. Gods, she thought, months go by and now all this. Hurrying into the shower, and running a comb though her hair she pulled on a tee and jeans, shoved on a pair of trainers and returned back to the kitchen to restore his clothes.

"How about we leave off the waistcoat?" She pointed her wand at him and raised her eyebrow, waiting for his answer.

Severus turned from the sink ready to spit out a glib reply. Leaning back and crossing his arms, he let his eyes wander over her. He never thought Muggle jeans were proper, but now looking at the low-slung belt that hugged her hips, and the short-waist tee that rode up just enough to show a glimpse of tanned stomach and belly button, he admitted to himself he might be wrong.

Her arm was still straight out in front of her, pointing at his chest, ready to send the spell when his eyes went to hers and paused.

"Dry your hair Miss Granger. It is dripping," he said huskily.

She dropped her wand and looked at him oddly, then looked down to see her hair dripping onto her tee, making it cling to her, and making it obvious she had not bothered to put on a bra.

She snapped her head up to see his smirk as she pulled the fabric away from her skin. Turning scarlet, she ran back to her room, slamming the door.

"Damn, Damn, Damn," she muttered aloud, stomping into the bathroom and looking in the mirror. "Fuck."

She grabbed her wand to dry her hair and tee to only pull it off and replace it with a bra and too large jumper. She returned to the kitchen keeping her eyes away from Severus' as she restored his shoes and clothes, sans waistcoat.

"I must admit that I like your…"

"Shut up Snape. Say it and I'll hex you."

"Your hair, Hermione, I believe I like it short much better than that bush you used to wear."

"You must practice removing your foot. You are getting quite good at it." She smiled at him. "So, you are taking me out for dinner? Like on a date? Not just sitting in a booth and eating stew at the Cauldron?"

"I shall collect you on Saturday, shall we say seven?"

"That works." She nodded and smiled widely. "I hope I don't need port keys this time."

"Just one." As soon as it was out of his mouth, he saw her face fall.

"Out." She stood and walked to the door.

"Hermione, I have a past that you only begin to understand. There are many that will still try to prove themselves with me. I will not risk your safety if some idiot decides to test his skills in a duel. We will have dinner. There is no hidden agenda, no plans as last time. However, you will wear a port key or we will not go."

"Promise?" She looked at him uncertainly.

"You will have to trust me."

She bit her lip and nodded, opening the door and looking up at him. "Severus? I'm sorry about earlier, with Mrs. Giles."

"Yes Hermione, however it was your wet hair that made it hard to take."

She closed the door behind him, still scarlet from his last comment and resting her forehead against the door, grinned.


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 14**

* * *

Hermione had woken early, much too early to walk though the Alley as she wanted. She did not feel comfortable walking when hers was the only footfalls she heard, she knew that she would be scared if she heard another. Instead she sat by the open window, leaning her head back against the frame and closed her eyes.

It was a humid morning, the air heavy as if holding the promise of the day. She could smell last night's rain and listened as the last drips fell from the eves to the pavement below. She opened her eyes and looked up to the tops of the buildings, noticing the white vapour that rose as the warm air touched the cooler tiles of the roofs.

Closing her eyes again, she imagined she could see the lake at Hogwarts, white, covered with mist as the sun rose but had not yet cleared its path over the mountain. She could smell the damp mud along the shores, and hear the castle as it began to wake. She missed the times she had spent there, the quiet times, the times the students were home between terms, or had laughingly left for the holidays.

She did not like this feeling of utter and complete loneliness that had begun to creep into her. She had twice joined her co-workers after work, once to go to the clubs, and once to a party at one of their homes. Each time had left her feeling worse than before. She had sat alone on Charles' sofa and watched them. She could not remember ever being as young and as carefree as they were.

She thought of Ronald, who even with his boyish and easy ways had learned to duel and cast an unforgivable by Fifth Year. She thought of Harry who grew up with the knowledge that he was unwanted by his family, only to find he was born to be one of two that must die in a war. None of them had ever been so young as to think they were free to have fun at parties.

She sighed and opened her eyes again, sitting sideways, and pulling up her legs until she was sitting in the window frame as if in a cocoon. Looking at the dress she had thrown on the floor last night, she wondered how she could have been so foolish as to think he was taking her on a date. She had spent the entire afternoon bathing and doing her hair, going through each dress in her wardrobe, trying them on, and matching shoes. Finally deciding on the deep blue she had dressed and preened until he came to collect her.

He was formal and crass, caustic and rude. His comments meant to hurt and cut. She had changed to the green at his insistence and then sat at dinner as he criticized her manners, the way she held her knife, her lack of knowledge of the wine list. She squeezed her eyes shut again and felt the tears that she had refused to shed the night before course down her face when she realized the loneliness that she now felt had only started last night.

.

.

.

Severus sat in his chair, with an inch of whiskey still in the bottle he held in his hand. He had given up using the glass hours ago, when the first hot flames of the fire had died and all that shone were glowing embers. He had drained it and flung it at the bricks. Now the shards of glass lay shattered on the hearth, sending tiny rainbows of colour to the ceiling.

Last night, when Hermione had opened the door his breath had caught and he had found it hard to talk. He remembered how he had looked over her shoulder to see if he could find her elsewhere, for this was surely not her. She could not have grown into a woman so wonderfully fast. He chuckled, shook his head as he tipped the bottle up, and took one more swallow.

She had smiled at him, he remembered, smiled and joked and asked if she was dressed _appropriately_ for where he wanted to go. At that moment, what he wanted had nothing to do with her wearing a dress or eating dinner. He could not offer her kind words or gentle smiles. He could not risk his wanting. He had told her she looked like a child made up, and wished even now that it were true.

He leaned his head back, wondered at the look on her face as she had merely smiled at him, and ran off to change without a word. He would rather she be a whore, for him to use and toss aside than what she was becoming to him.

He tipped the bottle up and finished it, throwing it to join the glass. He leaned back in the chair reaching out to the table and picking up his potion. Holding the vial up to the golden glow of the ember's light, he flung in against the wall. Perhaps this would help him forget, he mused and just this once he prayed for the pain.

Pain had helped him before. When on his knees in front of the monster he had bowed and scraped before, he had welcomed the Cruciatus Curse to keep him grounded in his hate. He would lift his chin and lock eyes with the Dark Lord, defiant in his punishment and knew that once the pain started his mind could cease to function. He sought that pain now as he tipped up his chin to rest his head against the back of the chair.

"Uncle?" Draco's soft voice came from the darkened passage. "Go to bed, it's almost morning."

Draco walked out to stand between Severus and the fire, looking so much like his father. Severus opened his eyes and observed his stance, the way he folded his arms, the way he held his head, seeing Lucius at every nuance.

"Pity you do not look more like the Black line, I would rather see Bella in you than Lucius," he smirked.

"I am not going to get into another fight with you. This is getting old."

"Not old enough Draco, not nearly old enough. Of course being a Malfoy I do not expect much from you in the way of knowledge, or understanding."

"I got less abuse hiding in the dungeons. At least Granger didn't berate me every time we spoke because of her own insecurities."

"This floo is open to hers if you care to go. I am sure at this time of night she will be abed, she may welcome the diversion."

"I'll ignore that," Draco sighed. "You have been absolutely miserable these past two weeks. Maybe the potions you take need to be adjusted."

Severus threw his head back and laughed, full throated and deep. "I just did lad, adjusted they are. Now leave me. I am tired, and much too old to listen to you."

Draco shook his and collected a blanket from his bed, laid it over him and waited for a response.

"I am going to be up on the coast for a few days. You are welcomed to come."

"I would much rather listen to Peeves than your constant banter."

"There are still some of the herbs coming up around the wall, the one by the edge of the property. You may still find something useful."

"Walking down memory lane? Looking for something that was never there Draco?"

"No," Draco sighed and began to return to his room only to turn back halfway there and turn to Severus, speaking to his back. "I used to look forward to the summers you know. When I wasn't here, I looked forward to our time together, the time at the cottage. It was the only time I remember being … I guess happy is the word."

"Happiness is an illusion my dear boy, an illusion for children."

Draco could only look at him, knowing it was no use to talk to him after he had been drinking. He shook his head, reset his wards and went to bed.

Severus heard the wards go up behind him and turned to look at the clock. There was still time to shower and dress before leaving for France. He stood and felt the pain begin to creep down his back and knew the burn would soon reach his legs. He lifted his hand and looked at the gold band that rested on his finger and thought the pain welcomed, as pain could obscure many a thing.

By the time he had showered, dressed in fresh robes and headed to the main gates, the sun was just rising. A heavy mist still hugged the ground, as if hiding low to avoid the sun. His black robes turned grey as he walked closer to the gate and deeper into the fog. Severus first apparated to Diagon Alley, breaking the distance of the trip in half. He landed hard, and gritted his teeth against the pain, then spun again and landed on the northern shore of France.

He stood looking out to sea, closed his eyes against the pain, then putting on his Death Eater persona turned in a flourish of robes to meet Lucius as planned.


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: Not mine. **

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 15**

* * *

Severus sat sullenly with his arms folded and his chin resting on his chest at the back of the room. Minerva was still entertaining comments on which one of the applicants was the best suited for the new charms position, First through Third Year instruction only, when Longbottom entered the room, tripped on the carpeting and found himself sitting on the floor looking up.

"Sorry 'bout that Headmistress." He flushed red, and scurried to find a seat.

"Professor Longbottom, we were just discussing the applicants for the new position."

"Still," Severus intoned, not rising his head, "as in we have been discussing this for the past hour."

"What did I miss?" Neville looked at Severus expectantly.

"Nothing, it has been only an hour."

"We have three applicants. Each one comes with a recommendation from a staff member." She walked over to Severus, tilted her head back and looked down at him stiffly. "Only the one that has the most recommendations also has a dissenting vote. I am afraid we are at an impasse."

"Well, if we are voting on it, must say most democratic of you, let me see the names."

She smirked at Severus as she handed Neville the list.

"Bloody hell! Who would have voted against Hermione? Must be one of the temps you hired." He looked up innocently. "Course she should have it, she had the highest grades and she even has experience." He turned to Severus and waded in further. "She taught potions that one term right? She said something about you being her mentor."

Neville realized what he had done as Severus head raised slowly up from his chest and pinned Neville to his chair with one look.

"Well that is settled. Severus, you can tell her the good news, can you not?" Minerva purred.

"Thank you Professor Longbottom." Severus leaned over to him sneering. "I shall make a note to pay you back in kind. Now that you no longer have access to an exploding cauldron I will have to find some other means."

Neville weakly smiled at him, running his finger under his collar, then turned to feign interest in what Minerva was saying. Severus stood and stormed out of the room.

Damn that witch, he silently cursed Minerva. She knew the complications this would cause and went ahead with it anyway. His only chance now was to change Hermione's mind about her foolish desire to pursue a teaching career at the same place that he lived.

"Draco!" he yelled as he slammed the door open in his chambers. "You need to start staying in your own chambers or leave here. Bloody hell, I cannot send you to the cottage with winter coming, and I still do not trust that mother of yours enough to put you in Spinners End with her, so use your own chambers or jump off a cliff."

"I take it you lost." Draco shrugged and flopped down in Severus' chair. "Mother has been there for months now, and the last time I saw her she had not taken any potions for just as long."

"I cannot leave her there. I will have to find somewhere else or break her wand myself." Severus rested his hands on the mantel and hung his head. "Maybe we are wrong to be so harsh on your father. He has put up with her for years. There has to be some good in the man not to have killed her by now. She has to understand that I cannot keep covering her magic. I have pushed Kingsley as far as I can on this. He will not be able to keep hiding it."

"Take her out of Spinners End and put her in the cottage." Draco smirked. "She can practice her warming spells legally. That, or bring Granger here and she can have the apartment in the Alley."

"That I am afraid is what is happening. Hermione is coming here." Severus ran his hand through his hair and sat down opposite Draco. "What about you Draco. Surely, you are getting bored with this anyway. I could give the apartment to you, or Professor Teller as it is."

"Keep brewing the Polyjuice Potion and I will keep pretending to be the best Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor this place has ever seen."

"You are not the first to think of this," Severus said evenly. "Minerva is impressed with your abilities, and I must say the students seem to be learning more than they have in the past."

"I voted against Granger coming here Uncle," Draco said suddenly serious. "I know you find her difficult to be near."

Severus raised his head and looked straight ahead at the fireplace. "I do not think it would be a good idea for her to know your true identity. I also expect Professor Teller to become somewhat of a recluse when she is in the castle. That or I am serious about you leaving."

"You still don't know her very well do you?" Draco laughed as he stood up, walked to the potion cabinet and took several vials, placing them in his pocket. "She is going to be mad when she finds you didn't't want her here you know."

"Draco?" Severus turned to him. "You do understand that as soon as your mother consents to my request to lure your father back, he will be caught and will go to Azkaban."

"He is still my father. The alternative is to see him dead." Draco looked at Severus evenly. "So yes, I understand."

"I still cannot get Kingsley to promise her safety. You know she may go to prison with him." He sighed deeply and shook his head. "I still have not told your mother you are here. If you care to tell her, you had no knowledge of this; that is your decision. I am sure on Hermione's word, and the witnesses to his other crimes, you will not be needed at her trial."

"Granger hid me, she alone stood by me. No Uncle, I will sit next to her, ready to testify if asked. I am resigned to the fact that Mother is not as I want her to be, but as you once told me happiness is the illusion of a child."

"Azkaban will kill her. Narcissa could never survive in that place."

"You sound truly sorry for her," Draco said, raising his eyebrow.

"Your mother was special years ago. You wouldn't remember her before all this, but she was … different," Severus' voice held none of his usual sarcasm.

"Getting soft old man?" Draco grinned.

"There was a time that she was the only one to stand by me." Severus looked up at him. "As Granger stood by you, your mother did for me."

Draco looked at him evenly then nodded and walked to the door. Severus turned back to the fireplace, and reached for his whiskey as he heard the door open and close behind him...

.

.

"Why should I turn it down? It is a good job. You know I would be good at it." Hermione stood with her hands on her hips. "As a full Professor I can have my own quarters so you only have to see me at meals, and if that bothers you so much I will eat in my rooms. Fuck that, you eat in your rooms."

"Hermione, it puts complications on…"

"Fuck you and your complications. I have put up with you and your petty problems for long enough. It is my turn. My turn. Get it?" She wrapped her arms about her waist and glared at him. "I have worked at that awful book shop for so long my mind is going numb. Ever have the joy of feeding books Snape? Gods, I have started to read Muggle novels. Not even good ones. I am going crazy."

"I think you made that trip a while back when you decided to hide Draco."

"How would you like it if you had to give up your potions, and your teaching, your library, forbidden to attend lectures and …"

"That is different."

"How? You arrogant arse! I have always suspected that you were a male …"

"I hate lectures, you make it sound appealing."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Fine, I am putting on a pot of tea, since that is the only thing we seem to do together we may as well sit and have a cup of tea. Bloody hell, I hate tea. I want coffee, or a Muggle soda, or even a butter beer."

"I seem to remember you have a taste for whiskey," he said feeling his lip twitch.

"Severus, I missed work twice last week just because I cannot stand to do this anymore." She walked to the sofa, picked up a newspaper and thrust it at him. "Look at this, I even bought a Muggle paper to find a job in the city. I can't do this. I don't want to do this."

She sat down heavily and looked up at him. "I know you rue the day the law came. Maybe I should have just left when I could. I don't know Severus, maybe if things had been different, maybe if Lucius had not caught me that night, I would have had the nerve to leave and none of this would be a problem. Maybe if you had not helped me I wouldn't have cared what happened to you and let you marry someone else."

"I am touched." He angrily threw the paper back in her face. "I have never had such options. Running away, Miss Granger? Turning your back on the world because it is not to your liking? Is it imposing on your parties and drinking games?"

"You arse!" She stood up and glared at him. "You are not a Death Eater! You are a bloody fool not worth the cost of that cheap mask you used to wear. You think I have enjoyed staying here. Parties? I have been to two. Two and one of them was as your guest at Narcissa's thrashing. That was fun. Oh yes, that was a party. I will have to make a note of it my scrapbook. I should have stolen a salt shaker as a souvenir."

She pulled her wand and waved it at him. "Decide Snape, nads or door. The Muggles say use it or lose it."

Severus felt his lip twitch as he looked at her standing in her bare feet, bushy hair in a cloud around her head, her eyes flashing, and a wand pointing at his heart.

"Welcome back Miss Granger. I can honestly say I have missed the old you." He smirked and sat down on the sofa as he slipped his hand in his own pocket making sure his wand was close. If this was indeed her old self, he knew better than to trust her too far.

"Arse," she muttered as she flopped down next to him. "You did that on purpose."

She looked at him from the corner of her eye and saw he was actually chuckling at her. She grinned and folded her arms across her chest looking straight ahead.

"You were always easy to anger. I have the scars to prove it."

"I never hurt you!"

"No, it was the burning robe and pant leg."

"It burnt you?"

"Just a small spot. However the scar is much smaller than the one I received chasing after you and finding a certain three headed dog."

"Oh."

"When you say 'Oh' it is like putting up a sign that says you are avoiding the issue."

"Oh?" she laughed at him.

"Your chambers are ready. Although your position does not become official for a couple of weeks, as my… my wife… you may move back whenever you chose."

"I expect you to respect me at Hogwarts, and not to tell me how to do my job."

"I expect you to listen to advice when it is given."

"I expect my own quarters."

"I expect Minerva will insist on putting you in the ones attached to mine."

"I expect you to talk to me every once in a while and stop your infernal muttering."

"I expect you to respect my privacy and not talk all the time, or badger me with foolish questions."

"Severus?" She turned and looked at him seriously. "We can do this right? I know you don't like me, and I will be right next door…"

"I never said I disliked you," he turned his head to look at her.

"Well, you sure hid it well the night we went to dinner." She looked down at the sofa. "I understand what happened at Narcissa's but what you did at din…"

"Hermione, stop." He stood and reached his hand down to help her up.

As she looked up at him and took his hand, he pulled her up and into his chest. Surprising her too quickly for her to protest, he brushed her mouth with his, alternately sucking at her lower lip and kissing her, until she opened her mouth and allowed him to taste her fully. Her arms slowly rose to his chest, and as he deepened the kiss, she reached higher and wrapped them around his neck pulling him down to her.

He pulled back and lifted her chin. "What I did that night, was to stop me from doing this."

He let go of her long enough to fist both his hands in her hair and pull her head to his mouth, deepening the kiss, holding her still and feeling her lean into him. He pulled her back, panting for breath as he looked down at her.

"I don't think I would have minded." She grinned at him, breathing hard through half parted lips. "It wasn't half bad. A tad too fast, but not half bad."

"You were not ready. It was too early." He traced her jaw line with the pad of his thumb then gently pushed her back. "I made a promise to you that I would not touch you. You only have some feeling for me because you feel isolated and alone. I will not take advantage of that. You will be perfectly safe in the dungeons."

"I am not a child, Severus."

"No, but you are in an unconsummated marriage, are you not?" he asked her harshly. "Do not make a game of this. It ends now before we are both sorry for it."

She felt a blush climb up her throat and could only nod at him. "I will be packed up by tomorrow, and put in my notice at… bloody hell, they are not getting a notice. I am just not going in anymore. I will send them an owl. I quit."

"I will send the elves to collect your things in the morning." He turned on his heel and walked to the door. "This term is still two weeks to completion. Your position does not start until that time. I will trust that you can find enough to keep you busy and out of my way."

"Of course, Pro… Severus," she said to the door as it closed behind him. Then she sat down on the sofa, putting her fingers to her lips.


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 16**

* * *

Hermione had finished unpacking and filling the bookcases provided for her before noon the next day. She worried about seeing Severus after his admission of wanting to kiss her and then doing so. Although she wanted to go to him, and talk about her feelings for him, she knew he would not allow it. He would push her away, and become moody. Better, she thought, to leave him alone and hope she could find a way to approach him.

She was confused over her feelings. Perhaps he was right. Perhaps she was too long alone and only felt this attraction because he was close. That still did not explain why she would often find herself daydreaming of him, or worrying when he was too long away. It did not explain the way she felt when he touched her, or how the feel of his lips made her gasp for air. She compared his kisses with those she'd had before, and knew she had never felt like this.

After she finished unpacking she hurried to visit Neville, finding him on his hands and knees trying to coax a plant out from under the workbench of the greenhouse.

"Hi, Hermione! Listen, I am in sort of a jam here." He leaned his head back down, resting his cheek on the ground and squinted to look in the farthest corner. "It moved so fast, bloody hell I have never seen anything like it."

Hermione squatted down next to him and followed his line of sight, joining him in his search until she was crawling around on her hands and knees with him.

"Umm Neville, I know we are looking for a plant. Exactly what kind of plant are we looking for?"

"A midget fernscurry, thought to be extinct, then this one just showed up."

"Here?" Hermione sat back on her heels and looked at him strangely.

"'Course not. Luna found it. You remember Luna don't you?" He peeked back at her and waited for her nod before returning to his search. "It goes right to her. She just clicks her tongue."

"Neville? Why don't you just send Luna an owl?"

He sat back on his knees and turned red. "It's the fourth time this week it got away. Sort of embarrassing to keep calling her."

"Neville, somehow I don't think she would notice." Hermione swallowed and bit her lip, trying not to laugh.

"Well, it should be okay if we keep the doors shut and I can ward it in." He took one more look under the workbench before standing up and then helped Hermione to stand.

"I have a cool box in the back and some cold drinks. Care to join me?"

"Why bother with a cool box?"

"Muggle drinks, I bring them up on the train. Magic seems to make them go flat, but I can get all the ice I need from the kitchens." He led her to the red chest in the corner and opened it up.

"Coke? A real coke?" She grabbed it and screwed off the top. "My gods Neville, I think I may visit every day. I never did really catch on to that whole pumpkin juice thing."

"What's wrong with pumpkin juice?" Neville looked at her oddly.

"It's a Muggle thing, Neville. What else have you been doing?" She tipped up the bottle and sighed as she took a long drink.

"Not much, this keeps me rather busy. The new Professor, Teller it is, Professor Teller is teaching me a new chess game. I am not too good at it."

"Like wizard chess?"

"No, but yeah, the pieces move, only the board is set up on different levels, not flat. I don't get it, but I keep trying," Neville chuckled. "Never really liked chess in the first place, but he is a nice enough bloke and doesn't seem to have many friends."

"He's the new DADA one, right?" Hermione finished her coke and set the bottle down. "I would have thought Sev…Snape would have taken it."

"Strange, that. He was the one that suggested this bloke. Said he was a good friend but no one ever remembered seeing him before. Just the fact that Snape said he was a friend was enough to put Sprout off him. She won't even let him in here."

"Well, Neville, it's been nice. I am living here now I plan to see a lot of you. Good luck with that fernscurry."

"See you at dinner." He smiled and walked off in search of his run-away plant.

"Oh, Neville, if you walk into Hogsmeade give me a shout, I'll keep you company."

"Sure, maybe I'll ask Luna to join us." He grinned as he dropped to his knees again.

Hermione stormed back to the dungeons and pounded on Severus door, pushing it open and walking in as soon as she heard the wards come down.

"Oh my, you waited almost twenty-four hours to disturb me. So thoughtful of you."

"Where is he? Which chambers is he in?"

"I am sure there was a beginning to this conversation that I have fortunately missed."

"Teller, Professor Teller. Draco! You know damn well who I am looking for."

Severus closed the door looking everywhere but at her. Furiously thinking of who had given her this information.

"Oh come on. DADA, the position you coveted and then suggest for a friend? A friend? For DADA? Severus, the only friend you would have for DADA would be a Death Eater on holiday. Not even Minerva would give into that one. Good Merlin, you could have thought of something better. After seventh year and what went on here, to say he is a friend, and have even the idea of his being accepted is ludicrous."

"Hermione, the simpler and closer to the truth the ruse, the harder it is to get caught in a lie."

She sat down heavily in his chair "What part is the truth? Gods Severus, it is not as if the position of DADA isn't cursed or anything. Why didn't you take it?"

She looked up and felt pinned by his look.

"I didn't mean you should take it because it was cursed, I meant… I 'm not sure what I meant." She sat chewing her lip trying not to laugh at his look of disbelief at what she had said. "I thought you liked it that one term, well, maybe it was not the best of times. Okay, forget it."

"Thank you, I believe I will."

"I just thought… anyway, what is going on with him? How long does he plan on staying here?"

"Hermione, I have talked to Lucius." He watched her closely for her reaction and did not miss the flicker of fear in her eyes, which quickly changed to curiosity.

"He has expressed his desire to reconcile with his wife."

"Here? In Scotland? He plans to come back?"

"So it would seem."

"After all this time? Why now? Why does he want Narcissa back?"

"It would seem his little toy tired of him. That or he tired of her. Whichever, they are no longer seen together. And no, I am sure he is using this as an excuse to return."

"What did he tell you about Draco? If he wants Narcissa, what about his son? Do you think he is just saying that to get close enough to harm them? Did he say when?"

"You usually put your hand up to ask more than one question at a time," he smirked at her.

"And you usually have a class room to show off for. Just try to keep it polite, Snape."

"The subject did not come up, nor did an opportunity present itself to swing the conversation that way. Hermione, talking to Lucius no-longer has any semblance to a conversation." He began to pace in front of his fireplace.

"Severus, sit down. You drive me crazy when you do that."

He looked at her in surprise, but did as she asked taking a chair next to her. "I can't do this."

"It is not hard. All you have to do is …"

"No, I mean here, in this chair."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "You mean to tell me that I am in your chair?"

He looked at her evenly, stood up and crossed his arms.

"Oh, good grief." She rolled her eyes as she switched places with him, pulling the other chair around to face him before she sat. "Better now?"

"Much," he grumbled.

"So, about Lucius? I don't even see how you could have ever considered him a friend."

"Lucius was in fifth year when I started here. He and Narcissa were the first to give me any sort of real acceptance. You must understand that I considered him my mentor. He became perhaps one of the few true friends I could ever count on."

"What happened to him? I mean, after the war when he and Narcissa were in the Great Hall with all of us, I thought he had finally come over to our side. Then, that summer he … well, that summer I never would have thought he could have done what he did to me. I mean, we all knew what he was like, but… I guess we all just sort of thought since they were with us, they were really with us."

"Power."

"That's it? Just power?"

"Power is everything Hermione. Power seduces, changes a man, and makes him want more."

"Like Albus, with the ring."

"Long before becoming Headmaster he recognized how seductive power could be. That is why he took the path he did. Even in this quest, and as head of the Order he sought his power where he could, always controlling, always needing to be in charge. And yes, like putting on a ring to feel once more the forbidden pull, knowing as he did it that it was wrong."

"You gave it up, you managed to walk away."

"No, I ran. I found something different to hunger for." He stood and walked to the door. "If we can learn where Lucius plans on staying once he gets here we should be able to stop him. All the Ministry needs is to confirm his whereabouts and they are prepared to go after him."

"You said that there was much more he was wanted for. More crimes."

"Black arts, unforgivable spells, missing witches last seen on his arm. You were not alone Hermione, you were just one of many I am afraid. He can no longer claim the Dark Lord forced him to commit war crimes, as he has continued to commit the same crimes. His innocence during the war is no longer a possibility. All of his deeds during the first war, and through the second, will be brought to bear."

"You have been seen with Lucius? Severus, are you implicated in this with him? I mean, Douglas and all."

He looked at her darkly as she tried to read what was on his face. "Professor Teller will be at dinner this evening. He will then return to his quarters. He is in your old chambers, which still connect to the floo here. He may visit. I will only ask that you not speak to him outside these rooms."

"Severus, I would do nothing to put him at risk."

"It is not just he that I am concerned for." He nodded to her before stepping out in to the hallway and closing the door behind him.

Later that night, well after dinner, Hermione threw up a silencing spell before she went down on her knees in front of the floo. Calling to Professor Teller, she called out for him to throw up the same spell before leaning into the fire.

"Granger?" Draco's face came in to view. "So it's true. You are staying down there. I tried to let you have these quarters but Minerva was worried someone may see you leaving here, or flooing down to your quarters at a bad time."

"It's fine, really." She grinned to see him. "How are you? Can you come through? Or I can come up if it is better."

"I think it would be better for me, just step aside." He waited until her face disappeared then walked into the floo coming out in her chambers.

"Draco!" She threw her arms around his neck as he returned her hug. "I am so happy to see you. I have worried about where he was hiding you."

"He said something about right out in the open," Draco said as he grinned at her. "Minerva wasn't thrilled but he actually told her it was your doing."

"Git," she laughed, taking his arm and leading him to her small sitting area. "I knew nothing of this until Neville mentioned that his friend was teaching here, and DADA of all things.

Draco walked over to the secret passage and opened it up, walking into Severus' side and up to his liquor cabinet.

"Come, join me." He began to pour himself a drink as he looked back at the door. "He won't allow me to have any in my room. I think he worries I will have one too many and stagger out into the hallways without my Polyjuice Potion."

"Any truth in it?"

"Oh, maybe a little. Not in the hallways, but a little stagger now and then." He frowned at her and lifted a glass in question, waited for her refusal then downed it himself.

He poured himself another drink and sat heavily in Severus' chair. "Last summer I went up on the coast for a week, before he made me come back here. Other than that, I have only gone out as Professor Teller, who you saw yourself at dinner."

"Where did he get the disguise? Is there any chance of running into your other self?"

"No, he went to a Muggle barber in Sussex. As long as I stay here, Hogsmeade, or even Diagon I should be fine."

"Why don't we go into the city when term is over? No one would recognize you in Muggle London. If not we could go to Hampton, or even Dover, just to get out of here for a while."

"I won't put you in danger, Granger." He leaned back in the chair, draping his left leg over his right, as he smirked at her. "Listen, I took advantage of you when I made you my secret keeper. Bloody hell, you would have done anything I asked to let you out of there. I know that. I also know we never got along before so I don't expect you to befriend me now."

"Is that the only reason you helped me? Because…you wanted help?" Hermione whispered.

"I really don't know. I know that as soon as I heard you were in the dungeon I knew I had a way out." He shrugged and drank the rest of his drink. "I knew that in saving you I was saving myself."

Hermione looked at him, her mind blank. She saw the person she thought she had begun to know suddenly change back to the unreadable person he had been.

"I have a lot to do Draco," she said as she stood up. "I trust you can return to your Chambers from here, so I will leave you to your whiskey."

She returned to her quarters, shutting the passage and throwing up wards. She stood alone in her rooms feeling tears begin to form. Refusing to think he used her, refusing to think herself more alone than before, she did as she always did and went to the library to find her solace in the silent tomes.


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 17**

* * *

Severus arrived at the north shore shortly after leaving Hermione to Draco. He turned to walk up the short path to Lucius' cottage hoping that these _friendly_ chats could soon end. He felt again as if he was living in two worlds, one light and this one dark. One world where Lucius grew mad, and one where his unwanted wife grew too close.

Severus approached Lucius' new home, only seeing two broken pillars of stone and half a rusty gate hanging from one broken hinge. As he passed through the ancient entry, the manor became visible. Although not as large as the Malfoy Manor Lucius had shared with Narcissa, this one was just as imposing. Severus gritted his teeth against the pain shooting up his legs and concentrated on not limping as he strode toward the house.

"Severus!" Lucius threw open the front door, stepping aside to allow him access to the entry hall. "I see your pain is back. Nothing a few drinks can't rectify I hope."

"Trying to read my mind old friend?" Severus tossed his cloak to the household that stood behind Lucius. "You know you have never been able to gain entry. If our Dark Lord had trouble I am surprised you even try."

"I am growing stronger, I thought a little practice was in order," Lucius said with a shrug.

"You are growing madder Lucius, not stronger. Tell me, when was the last time you were out of this house? A month? Two? Maybe more?"

"I have everything I need, and what I am missing I have only to ask for."

"I assume in that case that the liquor cabinet has been replenished." Severus walked into the sitting room and poured himself some bourbon.

"I told you to bring Granger this time. I would like very much to see her again."

"She is my wife Lucius," he snarled. "As much as that displeases me, you need to remember to whom you speak."

"There will be a time you will bring me whoever I ask for."

"I hear Hagrid has a sister, perhaps she will do," Severus muttered as he knocked back his drink and rose to get another. "After that the only witch I will need to bring you, is a healer."

"I am sure your wife would want to…"

"Lucius, don't finish that." Severus left his glass at the cabinet and took the half-full bottle back to his chair. "You wanted to see me. I suggest you get to it and change topics quickly."

"Don't tell me you have a soft spot for her. But, then again I seem to remember you liked another mudblood a long time ago."

"She keeps to herself. I do not intend to make her more a part of my life then this law already has. She serves a purpose, one I am unwilling to go without."

"I have decided to return to England sooner than I thought. Once I get settled you can bring her by for dinner."

"I think not."

"Narcissa will be there, so you need not worry about her virtue."

Severus leaned back in his chair and brought the bottle to his lips drinking the bourbon as slowly as he could, trying not so show any emotion over Lucius' information.

Narcissa. Lucius had been talking to Narcissa. He said she would be there.

"You have been talking of returning for a long time Lucius. Is it happening now, or is this just talk?"

"Soon, only a couple of things need to be finalized."

"I find it hard to believe that Cissy will take you back."

"She will do as she is told. She has always had a soft heart for that blood traitor of hers, which helps to control her."

"Draco is her son. Did you expect she would not?" Severus took another drink, knowing he had to keep his mind clear to concentrate on getting the information he needed. "I was not aware he was in the open again."

"She will have to pay for her past indiscretions. Your putting her up at Spinners End was a stroke of genius. Surely you did not plan on hiding her from me."

"She needed to stay out of sight, the Ministry was getting too close," he shrugged his shoulders. "I was not aware you were interested in her whereabouts."

"Jennifer found her." Lucius sipped his drink watching Severus closely. "You remember Jennifer? Poor Rachel's sister?"

"You know I do. What are you getting at? The time for games died long ago my friend."

"She will not tell me how she knew where to look, and I wonder who would have told her."

Severus looked darkly at Lucius wondering the same thing himself. He grew tired of the games Lucius wanted to play, games of intrigue and suspicion, and was sorely tempted to pull his wand and enter the wizard's mind to finish this dance.

"Obviously Cissy has not been hiding as she was told. No doubt she could not resist having a court to stroke her ego," Severus smirked. "I wondered how she was doing at Spinners End, such a far cry from what she is used to."

"I have you to thank for her impending return. After all, the abject poverty that she witnessed out of her window, has hastened her back. I believe that if she had not seen Spinners End she would still think she could live without my money."

"You do know that Malfoy Manor is watched."

"I have several of the loyal followers willing to hide me in England. They will then help me once again raise the cry. It is time Severus. We can do it this time. We can rid our world of the filth and have the type of world we have always wanted."

"Who is with you?" Severus looked at him evenly. "You of all people understand that I will no longer follow blindly."

"I am not yet at liberty to mention them by name, but rest assured they can be trusted. Can you be trusted?"

"I will be as loyal to you as I was to our Lord," Severus smirked.

"Voldemort's mistake was making a show of his troops. He marked them, it made us too easy to find and too easy to have one tell on the others. I will not make that mistake."

"Why do you think I would be loyal?" Severus spoke slowly, leaning back casually in his chair.

"Because this time, if you are not loyal, there is one in Hogwarts who will deliver her to me."

"Her?" Severus held the glass up as if examining the cut of the crystal, struggling not to crush the glass in his hand.

"Our Hermione, of course. After all, we have both had her."

"There is no one left with access to Hogwarts that you control Lucius. Don't try that old ruse."

"Do not be too sure." Lucius leaned back in his chair, crossing one leg over the other and sneering at Severus. "I told you that I have spoken to Narcissa."

"If your intent is to force me to do your bidding, then you are going about it the wrong way," Severus sneered. "Firstly, you would have to threaten someone I care about. Not the mudblood that keeps my arse out of Azkaban and can be replaced."

"What would it take to buy your loyalty and gain an oath from you?"

"More than you have." He tipped the bottle up and finished his drink. "I will never oath again. However, I can be bought."

"Name your price," Lucius grinned.

"Draco," he said evenly and hint of sarcasm gone.

"Draco? He is a weakling. Of what use could he be to you?"

Severus shrugged and laid his head back against the chair. "I have grown fond of the boy and I did make an oath to his mother, one of protection, long before the final battle. I find it still binding."

"You are done with your oath. You have no further obligation to him."

"That is my price. Give him to me or do without us both."

"You surprise me Severus. First the mudblood and now my son." Lucius locked his light grey eyes with Severus' dark ones. "He is yours, as long as you are mine."

"Then we have an agreement." Severus stood to leave. "I trust you know where he is? You may relay the message to him."

"As far as I know he is still in hiding. You want him? Find him on your own."

Severus made his way back to Hogwarts after spending the rest of the evening listening to Lucius prattle on, secure in the knowledge that even though Narcissa was back with Lucius, she had not mentioned where Draco was hiding. He also knew that he could not trust her to keep her silence, nor could he understand Jennifer's place in all this.

He arrived at the main gates near midnight and slowly made his way back to his chambers only to find Draco waiting for him, sans disguise.

"Godfather." Draco lifted a glass in greeting as he looked up from his book. "I have been waiting hours for you. I take it the meeting with Father was an exercise in futility."

"How did Jennifer find your mother?" Severus angrily threw his cloak on the chair nearest the door. "It would seem that she went to Spinners End and then ran to your father with the information. It also appears that Narcissa is giving up my protection."

"Mother did not tell him I was here or of your part. I have the oath that she will not, nor will she discuss more than the fact you were hiding her from the Ministry."

"And Jennifer? What the hell were you thinking?" Severus shouted. "Why not take out an ad out in the Daily Prophet? Have you learned nothing?"

Draco came to his feet and stood firmly in front of Severus. "I have learned to take oaths. Isn't that what you are famous for? You give oaths as freely as I'll take them."

"And do to your mother what she and Albus did to me?" Severus raged. "It ends boy, it ends now."

"It is ending, I will see to it."

"Lucius says he has someone inside Hogwarts. Is it you? Are you now in league with him?" Severus sneered at him, as his hand tapped upwards toward his sleeve, releasing the end of his wand into his hand.

"How dare…"

"Legilimens!"Severus shouted as he pointed his wand at Draco.

He met wall after wall as he tried to navigate to Draco's last meeting with his mother. Unable to scale the wall he turned and looked down what appeared to be a hallway, feeling Draco's mind struggle against him. He turned quickly and sought some crack to slip through, feeling a weakness, but unable to see it.

He took a step closer and grabbed Draco by the shoulders, trying to keep in contact even as he felt the younger wizard push him away. Suddenly, he felt Draco shudder and at the same time heard a wall come down. He headed towards the hallway once again. He saw Draco open the door and a bloodied and naked Hermione chained to a wall. _It is only a_ _memory_, he chided himself, _just a memory_. He could not scoop her up and take her away. The memory would have to play out.

Sucking in his breath at the condition she was in, he pushed Draco forward, breaking Draco's thought and forcing him to change the memory. He saw Draco pacing in one of the other dungeons, a door open as he stepped into Spinners End, and Narcissa.

He watched as Narcissa took the oath, kneeling in front of Draco, Jennifer standing as witness. He saw Jennifer walking up the path before Draco managed to break the connection.

"Fuck!" Draco fell to his knees.

"Don't ever think you are stronger than me boy." Severus reached down and pulled his head up by the hair, pointing his wand at him again. "Legilimens!"

This time he felt no resistance. Draco led him to the house on the north shore and walked with him into the house. He heard him promise his father Hermione and claim that no-one knew of his disguise. He heard Lucius' desire for the witch, and his promise to Draco that Narcissa would again live at the Manor.

He then searched for, and found, Draco talking to Jennifer, and their plans to save Narcissa whilst keeping Hermione safe, and getting Lucius out into the open.

Severus let go of Draco and stepped back. He was furious that the boy turned man would do this without talking about it first. Draco, it seemed, had no idea what could have gone wrong, or how foolish going to Lucius had been.

Draco staggered to his feet, wiping his bloody nose on the back of his hand. He sat on the edge of the chair and leaned his head back, pinching the bridge of his nose, glaring at his godfather.

"I didn't lie to you," he whined. "There was no call for this."

"Never try to shield your mind from me. Next time I won't bother finding a polite way in, I will just bring down the walls myself." Severus walked over and poured himself a drink. "Get out of my sight."

"That's the thanks I get?" Draco looked at him incredulously. "I risk everything for you and Granger and this is what you do? I can force him …"

"Force him? Force him to do what?" Severus snarled at him. "Force him to step up his plan? Force him to take action before I know what that action is? He will kill Narcissa and Hermione. What do you think he will do to Jennifer? What the fuck do you think he has planned for you?"

"If we push him now before he has time to plan, I can get him out of France and into the open."

"Leave me," Severus ran his hand through his hair. "I am tired and need my potion. Draco, just leave. I can't do this tonight."

Severus watched as the flames turned green and Draco went back to his chambers before sitting down to message his legs. He had not taken the potion for two weeks, and knew that he needed it now.

"Severus?" Hermione called to him softly from her vantage point in the hidden passage. "I heard you fighting. Was it with Draco?"

"Goodnight Hermione." Severus leaned back in his chair, resting his head against the back.

She walked over, kneeled in front of him pulling off his boots, and began to massage his ankles, moving up to his calves, first one leg and then the other.

"I heard voices, you sounded angry."

"You should leave," he winced as she found a spot over the damaged nerve where the muscle bunched painfully.

"You should take your potion." She looked up at him. "You keep this up and you are going to be back on a cane and needing help to walk. Your whole back is crooked. You can't even sit straight."

"You keep that up and I won't need the potion. I can think of other places I can have you massage." He bent forward and grabbed her hands from his leg. "Hermione, stop. I plan to get drunk, very very drunk. You need to leave."

She stood and looked down at him. "Why were you yelling at Draco?"

"In the morning," he grimaced in pain. "We will talk of it in the morning."

Hermione went to the floo and called out to Poppy, speaking quietly and with a look back over her shoulder nodded, moving to the side to let Poppy through.

"I will leave you with him Poppy," she said rising from the floor. "He wants to be an arse tonight."

"That means he is ready to take his potions and doesn't want to tell me," Poppy grinned as she headed to Severus with two small vials in her hands. "Run along now child. We will be fine."


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 18**

* * *

Hermione heard Severus call to her from the passageway as she walked out of her bedchamber fastening her belt.

"Severus? What can I do for you?"

"I have taken the liberty to have breakfast sent to the chambers. We are no longer required to eat in the Great Hall on weekends. One of the new changes you will find."

"That would be nice. I really didn't feel like getting all made up just to eat."

She walked past him and headed toward his sitting area where the meal already waited.

"I smell coffee, I don't get it often." She grinned. "So, was Poppy able to help last night? I must say you look much better."

"Yes, she has started me back on the potions," he replied stiffly. "I believe you once mentioned you preferred it over tea in the morning."

She looked at him in surprise. "You remembered."

"Of course," he said, not looking at her. "We have something to discuss. Please have a seat."

Hermione recognized the tone of voice from her previous conversations with him. Gone was all trace of sarcasm and wit. Whatever he had on his mind, she was not going to like it anymore than he enjoyed talking about it.

He sat in his chair and waited until she had taken a muffin and a cup of coffee. She pulled her bare feet up in the chair, tucking them under her and looking anywhere except at him.

He wanted to sit and watch her eat. He looked at the way she lifted her cup in both hands, as if to warm them and brought it to her mouth. How she pursed her lips and lowered her eyes to blow on the surface to cool the hot liquid before sipping. He watched as she closed her eyes as the first taste of the hot beverage filled her mouth and wanted to moan. Instead, he sat stiffly and waited until she gave him her full attention.

"So, what do you want? Is this about last night?"

"Yes. I want you to hear me out before you demonstrate your impatience once again."

She grinned at him and chuckled softly. "Are you sure you don't know my mother? She started almost every one of our talks with telling me not to interrupt."

"Wise woman, so unusual in a Muggle," he quipped as he felt his lip twitch at her admission.

"Okay, you talk, I'll eat."

Severus leaned forward, placing his arms on his legs, looking up at her. "Hermione, what I am asking you may be difficult for you. I understand this and will abide by your decision."

She laid her muffin down on the table and leaned back in the chair scowling at him. She already knew this would be bad.

"Last Christmas Eve, when you came to the dungeons you misconstrued the situation. She, Jennifer, was in my chambers seeking information on someone else you saw me with, also on a Christmas Eve, several years ago."

"Rachel."

"Yes, Rachel."

"You owe me nothing. I do not expect an explanation as to why she was in your chambers."

"I asked you to hear me out."

Hermione narrowed her lips and nodded at him.

"Rachel was to meet me one evening for dinner, she failed to show up. The Ministry recovered her body two weeks later. Jennifer always suspected that I knew more than I told her. She came that night to accuse me of having a hand in it."

"My gods, Severus," Hermione whispered. "How could she?"

"Easy my dear, as far as she knows I was in league with Voldemort at the time. She has only recently come to realize that I spoke the truth at my trials and was working with Albus since the first war ended. I have done certain things we will not discuss, Hermione. Things I am not proud of, but as far as Jennifer goes she believes me."

"What does this have to do with me?"

"Draco knew of Jennifer. I am sure he heard Lucius bragging about Rachel and laughing at how her sister searched. He took it upon himself to talk to her. Together they came up with a plan of to turn Lucius over to the Ministry. Jennifer now knows about your history with Lucius from Draco.

"Why is that a problem?"

"Lucius said he has someone with access to Hogwarts working for him, I trust that is Jennifer. Hermione, although I trust Draco completely, I do not know Jennifer very well. If Draco is wrong to place his trust in her, you are in danger. I think it best that you put your memories into a pensieve."

"Why?" she asked, pulling her legs from under her and standing up. "What good would that do? If Jennifer is with Draco, I am not worried. Is that what this is about? Giving someone my memories? No. I can't do that. To have someone watch, no, you can't ask me that."

"I asked you to hear me…"

"I don't give a fuck. No!"

"Hermione, sit. If you decide not to after you have heard all I have to say, than fine. However, do not make this decision on emotion alone."

She flopped down in the chair and crossed her arms scowling at him.

"Rachel had witnessed something that she planned on giving testimony to. What it is does not concern you. What does is that she and several others were killed before they could give that testimony."

"So when I am killed they can use my memories?" she asked incredulously.

"No, to remove the necessity to kill you. Hermione, Rachel did not tell me what she was hiding or I could have taken steps to protect her. I can do that now for you, let me help you."

"Why did Jennifer decide to get involved now? It has been years since her sister was lost."

"She has been keeping in touch with Narcissa. I only found this out yesterday when you were speaking to Draco. Narcissa has been living in a Muggle home. I assumed, wrongly, and that the magic the Ministry was reporting was from Narcissa. It appears to be from Jennifer."

"Narcissa? How do you know? … You keep too much, no wonder you …"

"She is no longer living as a Muggle. She has left. I only can guess she has gone back to the Manor."

"After you tried to help her out? What of Draco? What of…?"

"Hermione," he said as he pinched his nose, "please."

"Finish."

"Once your memories are in the pensieve your own recollection will be weaker, not as biting. I will seal them, only to open them at trial. Hermione, I do know that in the removing you will again have to revisit that time, and feel the pain but only briefly, very briefly."

"Can I talk now?"

"No," he looked at her evenly. "If you allow me to remove it, I can do so much faster. Perhaps somewhat more painful as you will feel the pain that Lucius inflicted on you as well as the pain of having the memory removed. However, it will be much faster."

"Now?"

"One more thing. You were a child when this happened to you. Perhaps not in years, or maturity, but as a naïve child that finds the good in people. You are no longer that person. You have grown, and become stronger. I think you can do this."

"Done?"

"Almost. We should do this today. As soon as the memory transfers, I will give you a potion that will put you to sleep, dreamless sleep. Now, I am done."

"Fuck off."

Severus watched her stomp back to her quarters, raise her wand and seal the passage. He sat and looked at the wall that had now appeared in front of him. He glanced at the clock and leaned back in his chair waiting for her to return. After twelve minutes, he leaned forward and poured her a fresh cup of coffee casting a warming charm over it and then leaned back just in time to see the door appear once more, and open slowly.

"So where would you keep the pensieve?"

"There are several options."

"Such as?"

"Your chambers. However they may be suspect if they are found where you'd had the chance to alter them."

"Minerva's office? They should be safe there."

"If you remember correctly Death Eaters have been able to breech these walls before."

"I won't have it at the Ministry. I don't trust them."

"No, I agree. I thought, to use your expression, to hide it in plain sight. To hide it in the Malfoy Library."

She tried to smile, sitting down in the chair and facing him; she wrapped her arms around her waist and narrowed her eyes at him.

"You will do it? Fast I mean?"

"Yes. It will be painful, as I will be ripping the memory from you and not letting you revisit it, but I can do it in a second. I have two potions ready, one for pain and Dreamless Sleep."

"You will…you will stay until the Dreamless Sleep starts working?" Hermione asked.

"Of course."

"Then do it and get it over with." She stood to walk back to her chambers.

"Hermione, I think it would be better to do it here. I will not hear you if you have difficulties in your bedchamber."

"Yours then?"

He stood and nodded as he turned and walked in to his room. Hermione followed him, stopping at the door and peering in nervously. She was surprised at the obvious comfort. From the soft carpeting that covered the cold stone floors, to the deep rich wood that covered the walls, this was a room not decorated for style but rather dressed for it. Nothing matched, yet everything went together, from the deep cushioned chairs to the large canopied bed.

"I am surprised," she spoke softly. "I expected more of the same coldness you have in your sitting room."

"Remove your shoes and sit on the bed. The pensieve is already prepared," he said, without turning around.

Hermione watched him for a moment as he uncorked the vials, placed them next to the bed, and then crossed over to retrieve a small bowl, which she knew was being used as the pensieve. She sat on the edge of the bed and toed off her trainers, folded her hands in her lap and waited for him.

He walked to the other side of the bed and crawled to the middle, placing the bowl down beside him, and positioned the vials so that he could reach them more easily

"Hermione, turn around and move towards me," he said softly.

She pushed herself backwards with her hands braced on the bed, then lifting her feet she turned towards him, sitting sideways on her right hip, her legs curled up beside her. Severus gently pulled her to him, lifting her as he did, until she was lying across his lap, on her side, facing him.

"Bring the memory forward Hermione, let it flood over you. Do it as quickly as you can." He held her tightly with one arm, his hand holding his wand to her temple with the other.

"I am scared," she whispered. "Not of the … not just the memory but you will see it?"

"No, I will only extract it." He frowned at her, not ready to tell her he had seen it in Draco's mind.

He lowered his head and brought his lips to hers, softly and slowly. She fought to keep her eyes open, not to fall into him, not to react to him. She tensed and kept her lips planted firmly together.

"Hermione, relax. It will make it easier," he whispered. He lowered his head, gently nipping at her lips and deepening his kisses, feeling her lips part and allowing his tongue entry.

"Why do you do this?" Tears began to fill her eyes as she tried to pull away. "Why do you make me think you want me only to push me away?"

He grasped the wand in his hand tightly, only to move his arm behind her, pulling her tight to him, crushing his mouth to hers, sliding his other arm down her side, and under her t-shirt.

"No," she pushed against him. "You don't …"

"The memory, bring it now," he said harshly, bringing the wand to her temple again. "Remember how he grabbed you, raped you and shared you. Did you enjoy…"

"Stop!" She struggled against him crying out as his words brought the memory of Lucius' treatment of her flooding back.

He pulling her against him as his wand pulled out a long silver wisp of memory, which he twirled around his wand and ripped out quickly. Thrusting his wand into the bowl, he reached for the pain potion.

"Drink," he forced the vial to her lips as she gasped out and threw her head back in pain.

He managed to pour most of the potion into her mouth, leaned over, picked up the second vial of Dreamless sleep, and hurried it to her lips.

Hermione fisted his shirt, burying her face against him only to have her head pulled back by her hair and a third vial, another for pain, was forced on her. She coughed and felt a swirl of blackness engulfing her as she fought to raise her head to see him.

"Severus? Severus, don't leave me. Don't leave me alone. Please, he… don't leave me." She closed her eyes and leaned forward, falling into him fighting against the sleeping potion. "Hold me," she sobbed into his chest. "Please, just for now, just this once."

He pulled her up to rest her head on the pillow, then lay down with her, pulling her to him, and burying his face in her hair. Gods, how he had hurt her. She must have felt twice the pain that Draco had the night before. He had only walked in Draco's mind, he had ripped hers apart.

He raised her up and slipped one arm under her shoulders, pulling her head to his chest and wrapping his arms around her. He wanted to keep her there, to move her things from her chambers and seal the passageway. Since she had joined him in the dungeons, he had come to realize how lonely he had been before and wondered why he no longer sought solitude as he had. He now found the sound of her voice, the quiet way she called her cat, the way she muttered under her breath, all the peace he wanted. He wanted quiet, not silence, and he knew the difference for the first time.


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: Not mine.

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 19**

* * *

Hermione woke up buried in the bed under a mound of soft blankets. She stretched and pulled the top blanket down far enough to peek around the room. She grinned when she saw Severus standing with his back to her. He was naked to the waist, his hair still wet from his shower. She saw the scars that criss-crossed from his shoulder to his waistband and as he turned the shadow of the mark he carried on his arm was visible. Her grin faded as she imagined how they got there.

"How long have I slept?" she asked softly.

"Almost twenty four hours," he said without turning. "Does your head hurt?"

"No, I feel good. It is so comfortable and warm I may never get up." She rolled over to her side, turning to watch him fully. "I can never tell the time down here. Even looking at the clock, I'm not sure if it is day or night. However do you manage without a window?"

"One gets used to it."

"Severus, would you mind terribly if I were to use the lab? I am bored here and thought maybe working on some potions for Poppy may pass the time."

"I do not let anyone use my personal lab as the potions I am working on may not be moved. However, you can use the classroom in the summer or talk to Minerva about setting up one of your own."

"I think I will." She sat up and swung her legs over the side of the bed. "If I had known your potion would knock me out for so long I would have changed back into my nightclothes first."

"Breakfast will be here soon. I took the liberty of ordering up again."

"No, I better get going." She stood and looked at him as he slipped on his shirt and began to button it up. "So, the pensieve is sealed and hidden?"

"Yes, I saw Lucius last night and told him that Minerva suggested you hide your memory. You should be quite safe now."

"And you Severus? Are you safe?"

"I think I hear the elf setting up breakfast. You should eat before you leave."

"What's wrong Severus? You sound…I don't know, as if something is bothering you."

He looked at her for the first time, not able to speak what was on his mind. He turned away and walked into the sitting area, sitting in his chair and reaching out to pour two cups of coffee. Hermione followed him and sat in the chair opposite him.

"Did something happen with Lucius last night?" she asked.

"Nothing more than usual. He is delusional. He still thinks he can resurrect the numbers the Dark Lord had and over throw the Ministry, taking everything else with it."

"How many does he have?"

"Only a couple of dozen," he smirked. "Not an army. However, do not underestimate the danger he can place you in. He has attracted the lowest rung, the rung that is hungry and eager for more."

"I don't understand how anyone could believe him," she sighed.

"I do not think they believe him as much as want what he has to offer until they get what they seek."

"And that is power."

Severus nodded at her, set his cup down and prepared to leave.

"Well, what I want now is a shower and some clean clothes," she stood up and started for her side of the passage leaving her breakfast untouched.

"Minerva has decided you are to be accepted as a Hogwarts staff member with a small gathering," he said as he walked to the door. "She will have a tea in the staff room this afternoon at three."

"You have to be kidding," she groaned, "I expect you to get me out of there as soon as possible."

"You need to get out of the dungeons Hermione. The last time you lived in the castle you taught a couple of classes and hid. It is best that you reacquaint yourself with others of your age."

"Severus? Is that what this is about? My age?" She stopped halfway toward the passageway and turned to him. "Don't you _dare_ run away. You answer me."

He turned and scowled at her. "Miss Granger, I have no intentions of debating our age differences with you. They should be obvious, as should our backgrounds. Need I remind you that this arrangement is in name only and does not demand that I spend my days catering to your needs?"

"I have never asked you to cater to me. I have never expected you to spend … oh just forget it Severus. Just go about your life and leave me the hell alone. I cannot figure you out and don't want to anymore. You act as if you don't want to be seen with me, as if I am an embarrassment." She turned and hurried to her side of the passage throwing up wards and closing the door as she fled.

He raised his wand and brought down her wards as fast as she could put them back up. Striding across the space that separated them he slammed the door open and grabbed her hand, taking her wand and tossing it on the floor.

"You accused me of being embarrassed to be seen with you. Have I ever given you reason to think that statement true?"

"How dare you barge in here? These are my rooms!"

"Answer me. Have I ever led you to believe…?"

"No, because you never are seen with me. Once, once you took me out to a horrible dinner, and once to that insufferable lecture. Unless you call the day at Narcissa's dinner party a pleasant outing. You avoid me, and then act as if..."

"I do not avoid you," he sneered.

"What do you call it then?"

He released her and stepped back. "It is you that should not be seen with me. Not the other way. Your friends have not visited, nor attempted to see you. Do you think I have not noticed? Do you think it is because they are sparing my feelings? Do you think it because I am embarrassed? Or because you should be embarrassed to be seen with me?"

"I would never!" she hissed at him. "How dare you think I am like that. My friends would … my friends… that's not fair Severus."

"It is not fair and it is not unfair. It is the way it is." He turned to walk away. "In the future I would appreciate it if you did not accuse me of things I do not do. I am accused of quite enough already."

"Severus, I… I'm sorry. I … ." she stumbled on her words.

Severus took a deep breath before he stepped to the hallway and continued to his lab. He needed to distance himself. He needed to stay away from her. He was nearly twenty years her senior, he was unwanted in polite society, he was caustic and hard where she was soft and kind. She helped her friends, where he had none left. She only wanted to be near him from loneliness. He only felt lonely when she was near. He needed to stay away from her.

Hermione stomped to the shower, undressed and stepped under the hot water. She wanted to smash something, to throw something in his face and rant at him. Instead, she had apologized and let him walk away. She needed to stay away from him. She needed to get on with her life and find someone who would want her back. He had never said he did. He had only played with her, pretending, getting her to do as she was told. She laid her head on the cool tile and wanted to go home, but did not know where it was.

She dressed and headed to the library to do some research. It was still the only place where she could forget all else and see only what was in front of her. She entered the restricted area and began to rummage through the shelves until she found what she wanted. Picking up "The Many Uses of Datura" with both hands and, she blew the dust off the cover, wrinkling her nose against the coming sneeze, wondering why she was doing this.

She laid the book down next to her parchment and quill and began to read, taking notes and losing all track of time. She was still lost in thought when a hand lay on her shoulder.

"Hermione?"

She jumped in her seat and turned around in the chair as her hand reached for her wand.

"Harry? My gods! Harry!" she shrieked as she jumped up and threw her arms around his neck. "It has been too long!"

Harry wrapped his arms around her waist, picked her up and spun her in a circle. Laughing he set her down.

"You look good girl. I almost didn't recognize you from the back. I think I like the short hair," he grinned as he pushed up his glasses.

"You look tired Harry," she reached up to push his hair behind his ear. "Is everything all right with you?"

"Yeah, I just got in today. I was in Italy when the invitation came," he grinned. "When Snape invites someone to a party for his wife you don't say no."

"He invited you?" she asked, raising her eyebrow. "He said it was Minerva's idea."

"It may be, but he is the one that sent an owl. Ginny is meeting us. Wait until you see her, big as a house and due any day now," he grinned and took her arm, pulling it under his and walking her out of the library. "Don't tell her I said that she is a little sensitive about it."

"Harry!" Hermione laughed and squeezed his arm, "I can't picture you as a father."

"Same here," he said softly. "It scares me, you know? I mean, I really don't know what to do."

"_You don__'__t __do_ anything Harry," she looked at his quizzically. "I am sure you will do fine, just be yourself."

"Arthur is the only real father I know. Well, and yours but… do you hear anything about them?"

"Kingsley got a report once. He said they are fine, but there's still no chance to restore their memory," she shrugged, "it used to bother me. Now I can just be happy they are alive and happy."

"Then I will have to count on you for advice," he grinned down at her, "after all I can't very well go to Vernon."

"He was not a father Harry, he was a monster. He even did a rotten job on his own son."

"I know, but other than Sirius he is all I keep thinking of."

"Oh right. Sirius may have been fun Harry, but I don't think he would have been much better than no father at all."

"What about you? Do you ever want children?" Harry stopped walking and turned her toward him. "I was shocked about you and Snape. When I read it in the Daily Prophet, I was so angry I didn't even want to see you. I know Ron hurt you when he ran off and married Lavender, but I didn't expect you to do something like this."

"It wasn't like that Harry," she pulled her arm free, hearing Severus voice in her head. "You know what he did in the war, you know about him. How can you still be angry at him?"

"I don't know, I guess I still can't get over how he treated me."

"Get over it now. It is time to grow up." She turned and walked away from him.

"Hermione," Harry called to her as he ran to catch up. "I'm sorry I said anything. I didn't mean to bring Ron up and hurt you."

"Ron told you that I married Snape because he ran off with Lavender? That's funny Harry. I got married before he did. If it was anyone who ran off and married from spite it was Ronald."

"He said…"

"I don't give a damn what he said. He got married because of the law, we married before it came," she spat at him wondering why she was defending her marriage to him, why she wanted to make it sound more than it was. "That's enough Harry. I don't want to talk about it now. I have a party to go to."

"Snape invited him and Lavender as well," Harry said softly. "They both came and brought the babies."

"Fine," she said turning down the hall to the staff room now completely angry with Severus. "Let's get this over with."

Harry reached out to hold the staffroom door open for her, and finding even this simple gesture irritating she quickly pushed past him.

She lost her breath for a moment when she saw Ronald standing next to George in the crowded room, realizing that she was still expecting Fred to appear at his side. He left Ronald and walked over to Hermione with a huge grin plastered on his face, then he leaned down and kissed her on the cheek and laughed as he gave her a great bear hug.

"Bloody hell girl, it's been too long. Look at you, an old married woman!" he laughed at her.

"George, I've missed you," she pulled away and reached to push his hair behind his ear, then stopped before she could complete the act. "Did your parents come?"

"No, they are down in France. Fleur's folks invited them months ago. Ginny's here," he said as he leaned down and turned her toward the window. "The fat one sitting in the corner."

"George," she slapped his arm. "She isn't fat. She looks beautiful."

"She has been anxious to see you but between Ronald and Harry …" he shrugged.

"I know," she said starting toward Ginny."Don't you go running off until we can talk more."

"Wouldn't dream of it. I need gossip, lots of juicy gossip," he laughed as he watched her walk away.

"Ginny, no, no… don't get up," Hermione pulled a quill out of her pocket and transfigured it into a chair to sit in. "I am so glad you came. When I heard about this, I thought it was an awful idea, but no one told me you and Harry would be here. And, George, he looks good enough to have the girls lined up after him."

"He could have his pick I dare say," Ginny grinned as she tried to shift her weight in the chair. "He is just now starting to date again. If Mum would quit with the whole grandchildren thing I think it would be easier on him."

"No pressure hey?" Hermione laughed. "You look great Ginny, and Harry is thrilled and scared to death."

"I know. He worries as if he is the first one to ever be a father."

"He'll be great."

"I thought that maybe by now you would have one of your own."

"No, we… well I really … we're waiting," Hermione stammered as a blush began to climb up her throat.

"Oh Hermione, I didn't mean to upset you. I guess if Snape was going to be the father I would have second thoughts myself."

"No, it's not that," Hermione looked around the room needing to get away. "We're just not ready yet."

"Everyone was really surprised you know. I mean, I guess you have your reasons, but …"

"Ginny, I need to walk around and play hostess." She stood and reclaimed her quill, shoving it in her pocket. "I wish we had more time."

"Oh, look. There's Lavender. Have you seen Ronald's children?"

"No, not yet." Hermione watched as Lavender walked to Ronald with a toddler holding onto her skirt and a babe in her arms. "I guess thisis as good a time as any."

She walked over to the couple suddenly aware that Ronald was watching her intently. She looked at him and saw her childhood friend and the teenager that had been her first love. She smiled at him thinly, seeing the relieved smile that covered his face.

"Hermione, you look great. I guess marriage, even to the git of the dungeons agrees with you." Ronald stepped forward and gave her a brief hug that she quickly returned.

"Still the arse I see," she chided him with a smile. "So, who are the little ones? May I hold the baby Lavender?"

Lavender looked down at the baby swaddled in her arms and turned her eyes to Ronald to see him nod.

"Sure. This one," she indicated the one at her knees, "is Arthur. The little one here is Heather."

Hermione took Heather, as Ronald reached down and scooped up Arthur and planted him on his hip. She lowered her head to kiss Heather's forehead and caught the smell that only a newborn could have. Part soap, part sour milk, part the sweet breath that hung in the blankets, and found it strangely unsettling. She looked up to find Lavender reaching out to take the baby back.

"She doesn't like strangers. She was premature and is still touchy."

"She is fine Lav," Ronald said softly, "Hermione wouldn't hurt her."

"I don't care," Lavender snatched the baby back. "I only came because you insisted on it so don't tell me how to act."

"Lavender, I am sorry. I didn't know she may not like to be held." Hermione took a step back to put distance between Lavender and her baby. "It's good to see you again, Ronald."

"How are you doing Hermione?" Ronald locked his eyes on hers in an unasked question.

"Glad to be here, glad to have shed my childhood," she looked at him.

"Shed your childhood? I say you shed your sanity when you married that git," he scowled.

"Still the understanding bastard I see," she gritted her teeth. "I wonder what you would say if he was standing beside me?"

"Ronald would tell him exactly the same thing," Lavender cooed. "He isn't two faced in his assessments of people. He would say it to his face."

"You find that a commendable trait?" Hermione smirked, "to say things to your face?"

"Yes, yes I do," Lavender snipped.

"In that case," she turned to Ronald and smiled sweetly, "Ronald, I was surprised when you did not have the nerve to tell me you no longer wanted to see me. I was even more surprised to hear that you married this cow."

"How dare you," Lavender seethed.

"Easily my dear. I can also count to nine, which Ronald must not be very good at," she looked down at the dark haired baby Lavender held in her arms. "Looks rather big for a seven month baby."

Hermione turned on her heel, searching the room for Severus before she even knew who she was looking for. Minerva was near a punch bowel talking to Professor Teller. She hurried over to join them finding it difficult to breathe.

"Minerva," she said laying her hand on Draco's arm. "I would like a moment with the Professor if you don't mind."

"Severus is not here child," she said as if reading her mind. "He said, and I quite agree with him, that you and Professor Teller should not be seen alone together. It must not look as if there is any history between the two of you."

"What? Now he decides who I talk to?"

"It will be over in just a little while. I was just getting ready to make the formal announcement that you have accepted the position here at Hogwarts"

"Do it without me. This had nothing to do with welcoming me and everything to do with him wanting to get rid of me. I am done with him pulling the strings."

Hermione almost ran from the staff room, hurrying down the stone hallway not knowing where to go, only knowing she needed to get away from the people he pushed at her. He was manipulating her. He wanted her out of his world and into theirs. She felt tears sting the back of her eyes and thought they were in anger, then wondered why her chest hurt so.


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 20**

* * *

Hermione continued down the hallway wanting to put as much distance between her and the welcoming party as she could. She had not seen Neville in the staffroom, which she now thought of as unusual and decided to head for the greenhouses. She didn't want to be alone, and she didn't want to return to the dungeons to face Severus.

When she did not find Neville there, she turned once again to the library only to sweep the books onto the floor. She wrapped her arms around her head, and laid them on the table. She refused to cry. She refused to want what everyone else had. What Ginny and Harry had, and even what Ronald and Lavender had together was out of her reach.

"Missy Snape," a small voice squeaked from beside her. "You come quick. Master Snape says now."

Hermione lifted her head to look at the elf that was hopping up and down next to her chair.

"Tell him to go to hell."

"That woman makes him angry," the elf's ears went flat, "he says come."

"What woman?"

"That woman, that one that makes him angry. Mrs. Giles he calls her and then says not nice names."

"Shite!" Hermione pushed her chair back and began to run down the hall. _Gods_, she thought, _not today, please not today_.

"I will thank you to leave," Severus' voice came out of the open door as Hermione approached.

"Not until I talk to your wife about these developments." Hermione recognized the nasal voice as she entered the sitting room.

"Discuss what?" she asked the angry witch that stood glaring back at Severus.

"Mrs. Snape, I came here to give a full inspection with the authority of the Ministry."

"You illegally entered my chambers," Severus said flatly. "Leave."

"I have every right to use the floo to your home. As an inspector, I can come and go at will. It's not as if you are still in London where you were a simple walk away." She turned to Hermione. "He was not here when I arrived so I began my inspection."

Hermione felt her stomach fall. The passageway was sealed. She looked at Severus who stood with his arms crossed glaring at Mrs. Giles.

"I have to ask you Mrs. Snape, where are your personal belongings?"

"My husband sleeps poorly Mrs. Giles. I keep a bedchamber apart from him."

"This room is also devoid of your presence."

"Make it devoid of yours." Severus stalked to the door and held it open. "Leave before I do something you regret."

"Severus, please." Hermione turned back toward Mrs. Giles smiling widely. "May I order up some tea?"

"I have been fooled twice, Mrs. Snape, I will not be made a fool of the third time."

"Give her time, I am sure you will be proved wrong," Severus intoned.

"Severus dear, I am sure this is a misunderstanding."

Hermione flicked her wand to open her quarters and turned to Mrs. Giles smiling warmly. "There, you see? It adds a little spice to stay apart sometimes. Wouldn't you agree?"

"I see that you had to unseal the door to your bedroom that is obviously kept that way against your husband," she spat. "I will file a report and leave it up to the committee to decide.

"Oh, joy." Severus bowed as she swept by and then slammed the door behind her.

"Stop that you arse." Hermione pulled the door open to run after Mrs. Giles only to stop when he grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Let it go." He looked at her evenly. "It's not working Hermione, let it be over."

"Over? Over? Let it be over by sending me to the auction block like a piece of meat? Is that what you want them to do to me?"

"What do you want? Do you want to waste your life like this? With me? Do you expect the world to wait for you?"

"Yes! You were on that block first. Did you forget that? Did you forget that I did this to help you?"

She shoved him away from the door so quickly that he stumbled back giving her just enough time to rush out and run after Mrs. Giles. She caught her at the main door and begged her to listen to her explanation.

"We had a fight, all couples fight. It is nothing, really." Hermione smiled although her heart was pounding. "It is not what it looks like."

"Mrs. Snape, each time I have come to see you something has seemed amiss, now I find this. I can tell you that the Ministry has already abolished most of these so called _just in time _marriages and yours may well be next."

"But, ours is not like that. I assure you I …we are not like that."

"No Mrs. Snape, it is obvious that you live apart from him. I have suspected it for some time. I thought to give you time to reconcile your differences, but the time is now up."

"No, please don't do this. A little more time is all we need." She found herself begging and hated herself for doing it.

"I am sorry, Mrs. Snape, or should I say, Miss Granger. Your war status has gotten you this far but enough is enough."

Hermione stood and watched as Mrs. Giles walked away feeling her life spin away from her. She did not know what to do, or who to turn to. If this were over, she would have no place in the castle, no place she could be free of the eyes that would look at her and wonder what had happened. She would have no one, and she would miss him more than she could admit. She felt panicked at the thought of someone else petitioning for her, and being forced to consummate a marriage with someone…any one else.

"Mrs. Giles!" She started to run after her only to feel his hands hold her back by her shoulders.

"Hermione?" Severus stood at her back having rushed after her. "Come back to the dungeons, we can talk this over."

"No!" She spun around to face him. "Just say yes or no. Do you want me to leave?"

"It is not as easy as that," he spoke softly.

"It is. It is only that, just one word. You still hold the apartment in Diagon. Tell me now if you want me here or there. Tell me Severus."

"It may be best for you to commute."

"Term is almost over. We have the summer before I start teaching. Just send me my clothes. Leave the rest in my chambers," her voice began to shake. "I don't need you, I don't need anyone."

"Hermione, please…"

"No, on second thought tell Minerva I am sorry. Tell her I no longer accept the position. Tell her my bastard of a husband does not want me here. Tell her that he is willing to let me be claimed by someone else. Tell her …"

"What would you have me do?" he spat at her. "You have known from the beginning that it was only a matter of time before we were found out."

"You're right. I need to move on. I need to find someone who will marry me before the Ministry gives me to someone. You don't mind that, do you? You don't mind if your wife starts looking around…"

"Stop," he grabbed her arms roughly. "While we are still married you will…"

"Don't you dare, don't you dare give me conditions. Leave me alone." She brought up both hands to his chest and pushed him away. "Is this where you kiss me to get your way? Is this where you tease the stupid little witch into hoping that you could care for her?"

"I did not…"

"You did, you know you did. I trust I have my savings still in your accounts? I must have enough to live on until other arrangements are made for me." She stepped back from him. "I will see you to discuss the financial arrangements, splitting out my account and whatever we have to do to end this, but other than that leave me. Just leave me alone! That should be easy for you."

"Hermione, it is not safe…"

"I will take care of myself. I am as safe in town as I am here, and much happier to be away from you," she raged at him. "I know where I stand with you and where I have always stood. Just don't touch me, don't pretend. I hate you! Do you hear me? I have always hated you."

He watched as she ran to the main gates, and turning in mid-stride, she apparated to the apartment in Diagon Alley.

He turned back to the castle and strode up the steps, pushing past a smirking Lavender and a red-faced Weasley. The Potters stood to the side, Harry making a move toward the professor when Snape's dark glare stopped him.

He disappeared into the castle, his robes billowing behind him as he cursed under his breath. He foolishly thought to tell her what he felt. He knew it was a mistake. She said she hated him, that she had always hated him. He found it difficult to breathe and difficult to think beyond the memory of her running out of the gates.

He was right in pushing her away, in demanding she reconnect with those her age, to make her move on with her life. She must know now that her friends would not accept her back until she rid herself of him. Knowing what she would discover at Minerva's party, he thought he was prepared to see her leave. He was wrong.

He pushed open his door and walked to the liquor cabinet, picking up the first bottle that he saw and downed the contents. He needed to see Lucius. He needed this to end.

The Death Eaters that were still free, and those now loyal to Lucius had already been trapped by the marriage law. She would be safe from them. They would be able to match her with someone closer to her age, closer to her demeanour, and closer to what she should look for in someone to spend a lifetime with. He was determined that even if it could not be him, she would be safe and find happiness.

Heading for the floo, he took one final look around his chambers, seeing the passageway still open he pulled his wand and closed it, hiding all trace of her. Turning back to his destination, he watched as the flames roared green and Minerva stepped out brushing off her dark green robes…

"Talk," she said as she stood up straight and folded her arms glaring at him.

"I was just leaving," he sneered.

"What happened that she is leaving? Really Severus, to fight right in front of everyone was most rude."

"The Ministry decided to run a surprise inspection today. We were not prepared."

"How bad was it?"

"You saw for yourself how bad it was. She is gone."

"What I and everyone else saw and heard was that you did not try very hard to make her stay."

"Minerva," he said running his hands through his hair, "I don't want to do this now. She is gone. She is better off. She can finally get on with her life."

"She _was_ getting on with it, are you too bloody blind to see that?"

"I take it you heard what she said to me?"

"The whole staff could hear," she hissed at him. "Now you fix this. Do something before it is broken for good."

"There was nothing to break, Minerva. Remember? This was to last at the most five or six months."

"I don't know where you ever got that idea. Have you ever known the Ministry to back down on a decision?" She tipped her head back and looked down her nose at him.

He narrowed his eyes and scowled at her. "Minerva?"

"Well, she offered."

"Minerva?"

"Severus, she was in a fragile state. We needed to protect her. If she was claimed by someone without your… well your restraint, it may have broken her beyond repair. You remember the condition she was in after Lucius. When she offered to help it was a perfect solution all round."

"You have been talking to that damnable portrait again."

"It just happened, now you need to make it work."

"Ever since you insisted on stepping in and forcing the truth out of her about Lucius, she has lived under that memory. She would not be in this situation if she had not been in the castle when the law came into being."

"You need to bring her back. None of that matters."

"No." He glared at her. "I will do no such thing. It is over."

"Not yet it is not. Do something. Fix it I said."

He pushed past her and continued to the floo, heading to the Leaky Cauldron, and from there to head for the north shore of France. It was time to put an end to this, and to ensure her safety. Not to pretend her future lay with him. It was time to force Lucius' hand. If she was to live in the city, away from him, if he was never to see her again, he would be damned if he would leave her to Lucius.

"Lucius!" he called out as the elf opened the door.

Hearing no response, he looked down at the elf and raised an eyebrow in question.

"He in the dungeon," the elf said as it looked at the floor trembling.

"Why?" Severus felt his back turn cold.

"He brings a young lady home Sir." The elf looked up with his eyes as large as saucers.

"Show me," Severus hissed.

The elf hurried from the room with Severus following at his heels. He opened a hidden panel in the hallway and began down the stairs when Severus pushed him aside and ran down the steps, pulling his wand as he went. He heard muffled screams and the sound of a whip cracking and hurried to the door of the closest cell pushing it open and pointing his wand at Lucius' back. Realizing he still had time he lowered it quickly, but not before making eye contact with the gagged witch and nodding at her once in recognition of her position.

"Really Lucius," he drawled. "I only have a short amount of time perhaps you could finish this later."

"Ah, Severus, my dear friend, look what I have." He grinned at Severus then turned back to the bound and gagged witch.

"Interesting. A mud-blood I trust," Severus chuckled as he walked around the witch inspecting her.

Her robes were on the floor, leaving her in a summer dress that had the back all but shredded by the whip. She was on her knees with her hands tied behind her back. Her eyes were red from crying and her nose flared as she struggled with her tears and hitching breaths to take in enough air.

"Not bad, rather thin and a little on the short side," Severus squatted down next to her, "of course it is hard to judge when you keep her on her knees."

He stood and grabbed her hair to haul her up. "Ah, she is not as petite as she appeared. What is she sixteen? Fifteen?"

"Severus, you ruin the fun," Lucius laughed. "You may make use of the table if you want her."

"Umm," he smirked. "Perhaps, in a little while. I have just left my wife and am not up to it right now."

Lucius laughed at the admission and began to undo his belt. "You won't mind if I go first then."

The girl pulled against Severus' hand that still held her hair only to have him hold her tight.

"Is that any way to treat a guest?" Severus looked at her, running his eyes over her body. "Give her to me. I will have her later for dessert. Now I need a drink. I am sure I saw a bottle of bourbon in the sitting room."

"Why should I give her to you? You have your own."

"Call it a boon. The one I have does not like to experiment and is a little too well used for my liking."

Lucius looked at the girl and sneered. "Fine, take it. Although I do not think it wise to take her home with you."

"My wife is at the apartment in Diagon for a few nights. That will give me plenty of time. Now, let's drink." He started for the door dragging the witch along with him.

When they reached the sitting room, he pushed the girl roughly to the floor near the chair he always took, and crossed to the bar to pour drinks. He found the girl familiar but could not place her name. He racked his mind trying to remember whom, if anyone, had been missing in the Great Hall the night before and could find no memory of an empty seat.

"It is time to call a meeting Lucius. We need to organize, to prepare." He handed Lucius his drink and sat in the chair near the girl, pulling her closer to his feet and resting his hand on her head.

"We need not be hasty." Lucius leaned back in his seat smirking.

"Call the meeting in a fortnight or I will call it. If I do my old friend, it will not be you who is in charge."

"Ah, so the power calls?"

"No, the hag of Hogwarts does. I am sick of her and her continued demands that I report to her. It is now or never Lucius."

"Finish your drink and take her," he said with regret lacing his words as he looked down at the girl. "Unless you want me to watch?"

"No." Severus stood and pulled the girl up. "I have plans for her that do not include you. If you don't mind I will use your floo."

He pulled his wand and opened the floo to connect with his own, almost glad that the girl had been caught with Lucius to give him this opportunity to leave quickly.

Pushing the bloodied and beaten girl into the fireplace, and then standing over her, he threw down the powder to take her back to Hogwarts.


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 21**

* * *

He stepped out of the floo and immediately grabbed another handful of powder. Tossing it down to take the girl to the hospital wing, he scooped her up as soon as the flames faded from green.

"Poppy," he bellowed. "Now!"

He hurried to a bed, lowering his burden and untying her wrists before pushing her into a laying position and releasing her gag.

"Professor? Thank ….." her voice hitched as she began to sob.

"What is your name child?" He frowned at her as Poppy ran toward them.

"Ellen, Ellen Johnson."

"My goodness, Ellen," Poppy hurried to her waving her wand in quick diagnostic patterns. "Severus?"

"A whipping, he got no further," he reassured her. "Miss Johnson, I assume Mr. Malfoy had only just started to beat you?"

She nodded and wiped the back of her hand across her face. "After last class, my sister took me to Hogsmeade."

"He took you from Hogsmeade?"

"No, another man, he…"

"You can question her later. Right now she needs to be treated, Professor Snape," Poppy said, putting a stop to the interview. "Tell Minerva I have her."

"Miss Johnson," Severus frowned at the girl, "I must apologize for my treatment of you. It is important that Mr. Malfoy continue to trust me. Do you understand? I would not otherwise have treated you like that."

Ellen nodded and looked up at him sniffing. "You don't have to tell my Dad do you?"

"Miss Johnson, trust me, he will be glad to have you back," he felt his lip twitch.

"Yeah," she sighed, then rolled her eyes, "it's after he's glad that I am worried about."

"Child," he said pinching the bridge of his nose. "You have just had a whip taken to your back surely you are not frightened of your father."

"What would you do if your daughter went to Hogsmeade when you said not to and ended up like this? No, sir. I'd rather he didn't know. Mum won't let me come visit no more."

"You are not a student here?" He took her chin and turned her head to the right seeing the familiar profile.

"Her sister is in your double session," Poppy said softly. "This Miss Johnson is a squib."

Severus crossed his arms over his chest understanding the girl's trepidation. As a squib, her father would be overly protective, not allowing her to mix with the magical children. He would also be embarrassed that she had no means to protect herself or do other normal things all magical children could do. Ellen was also at the age many families decided to confine squib children to the house. Making their life lonely, as they would never be able to socialize again, unless they could find a place in the Muggle world.

"I have some clothes in my chambers that should fit her," he said, turning to Poppy. "Perhaps it would be better to let her visit for a few days until the healing is complete."

"Professor, you know that is not allowed. Her parents have the right to know."

"Then enroll her in Muggle studies. I am sure she can benefit from the lessons in a wandless study. Inform her parents we want her to take part as a … study for a new course we may be offering."

"Softy."

Severus turned hearing Poppy's chuckle as he headed to see Minerva.

_How would he feel? _Ellenhad asked_. How would he feel if a child of his had been in this situation? _He did not know how to answer that. He did not know if he ever would. He thought of Hermione and wondered how she would feel.

At the same time, Hermione had curled up in the dark on the apartment sofa. She'd been in the same spot ever since she arrived, unsure of what to do next. She knew she would have to find a job. Only this time she would not have to stay close to the apartment to check on Draco. This time she would not have to hurry home to make sure he had his meals on time, or be in before dark because she was too scared to walk alone. This time she could do what she wanted, when she wanted and with whom she wanted.

She closed her eyes and pulled her robes tight around her knowing she could not stay like this much longer. She was contemplating how to spend the next day when an elf popped in, its arms full of clothing.

"Hang them in the closet." She sat up, putting her feet on the floor and looking to the window.

"I expected these last night, it's almost morning," she said, following the elf in the bedroom.

"Master say…"

"I don't care what he says. Just hang them up and leave." She watched as the elf hurried to the closet. "Where are my Muggle clothes?"

"Master, he… he say not to brings them… he," his ears flattened and his head dropped to his chest.

"Out with it."

"Master's witch has need of them."

Hermione stared at the elf as everything began to swim. Finally, the swirling colours in her mind started to fall into place. No wonder he wanted to rid himself of her. No wonder he wanted her old friends at the tea. He wanted them to take her away, to make her leave the castle, to be out of his way. She thought of Jennifer, and remembered the hurt she had felt when she saw the smirk on the other witch's face. _Fine_, she thought. _I am done with him_.

She turned and walked to the kitchen wondering what there was to eat. She had only been gone a few days but it appeared that most of her kitchen had been packed and carted off to Hogwarts. She found a tin of tea and opened it, raising it to her nose before throwing it at the wall angrily and reaching for her wand. Her hand shook with rage as she let loose with her emotions and rid the cupboards of every food item they held.

If he was paying the accounts, she was not going to eat soup from a tin. She would take nothing but her clothes, the clothes she had paid for, not the fine clothes he bought for his witch. He must have bought them before he knew he would not sleep with her. Before he realized how repulsive he found her. Before he had seen the full details of the rape in her pensieve.

She wanted nothing to remind her of that place or of him. She turned on her heel and headed for the door knowing the deli would be open for the early morning trade. _He can pay the accounts_, she thought. She needed to fill the pantry with better than she had before.

She hurried and picked up enough food for a couple of days before returning to shower and dress for a trip to the Ministry. She had once hoped to work in the spell department, or even the charm division. There were always openings in the Muggle Liaison section, and in as much as she would find that a pleasant diversion, she had hoped for a little more challenge.

She used her wand to dry and style her hair as she glanced at the clock. It was still early, early enough to miss most of the Muggle traffic if she chose to visit London before going. She pulled her robes off and shrunk them to fit in her purse, then making sure her wand was well hidden she headed for the Leaky Cauldron where she would slip out into the Muggle streets.

The Alley was just now fully awake. Witches hurried down the pavement pulling little ones along heading for the day school while wizards walked while reading the Daily Prophet, slowing down to turn the page then speeding back up somehow avoiding knocking anyone down. She stepped off the pavement twice to avoid walking into a newspaper with legs coming at her, the third time she stood still and braced herself refusing to move.

Within inches of her face, the paper stopped and a head peeked around the edge. George laughed seeing her standing with her fists clenched at her sides and her eyes squinted close.

"Don't really think I'd knock you down do ya?"

"George? How did you see me?"

"Didn't. Paper did." He folded his Daily Prophet and tucked it under his arm. "I developed a spray. One squirt on the paper and it can tell when to stop. This place was wicked dangerous in the morning."

"It should be a money maker," she said with a laugh.

"Come on." He slipped his arm around her shoulder and guided her down the pavement. "Got a pot of tea waiting at the shop. You look like you could use some."

"I was headed for the Ministry. I thought there may be some openings."

"Save you a trip, I'll floo Dad."

"I would rather you …"

"Don't have to tell him who for." He looked down at her quizzically. "You know Hermione, whatever happened between you and Ron is old news. Mum was a little miffed at the time, but Dad always figured it was Ron's fault. I guess everyone else just thinks it takes two to kiss and make up and one of you didn't want to."

"It's complicated." She bit her lip and looked everywhere but at his face.

"Don't want to know about it," he smiled easily, "that's old gossip. I only want the new stuff."

"Thanks, George," she said, her relief evident.

"I'm just going to say one thing and then matter closed." He stopped walking and faced her, laying his hands on her shoulders. "What ever it was that you once saw in Snape, it was enough for you to marry him. Hermione, don't pull away, just listen."

She stopped and looked down at the ground.

"Whatever is happening now I don't care, and I don't want to know about it. I just want you to listen to him."

Her head snapped up and she saw his eyes locked on hers. "It's not what he was saying Hermione. It's how he was looking at you. You need to think hard before walking away. If I learned anything that last day at Hogwarts, it was to not put anything off and not to take anyone for granted."

"Now," he said pulling her along by the hand. "Enough of that. I have some great gags to show you."

"George?" she started.

"Nope, matter closed. I have a reputation to keep up and I won't lose it giving advice to the love starved."

"You really are a …"

"Prat. I know. I work hard for the title."

He stopped in front of his shop and unlocked the door grinning down at her. "Wait until you see the new Witches Handbag. You can put as much as you want in it and then it walks itself home."

"Whatever for?"

"Oh girl, you don't shop much do you? You have to get with it. Spend some of Snape's money."

"George? Would you mind if I gave you a rain check on the tea?"

"Let me get in touch with Dad first."

"No, I don't think I need that right now. I need to do something."

George gave her a bear hug before releasing her and pushing her toward the door. "If he still acts like an arse I have some fantastic hair potions. Just a splash in his tea and you can change his hair pink."

She giggled as she ran out the door and started down the pavement. She was nervous, and didn't know how she would do this, but it was time. She would tell him how she felt and then it was up to him. No more games. No more hidden agendas. This was it.

She fell to her knees in front of the floo and called to Severus. Waiting for an answer, she looked at the clock. It was after breakfast, but before his first lesson. He should be in his chambers. Again, she stuck her head in the flames and called to him, and again she waited in vain.

Sitting back on her heels, she thought that perhaps Minerva was having a staff meeting. After all, with only six days to go before the end of term this would be the last opportunity. She threw in more powder and called out to the older witch.

"Hermione, my dear," Minerva's voice rang out before her face came into view.

"Is Severus there, Minerva?"

"No, there was a little mishap last evening. He is in the infirmary."

"What? When? How bad…should I come through? "

"No, no child. It's not him this time."

"Thank Merlin. I don't think he can take another injury. You know he does not take his potion all the time as it is. You should get Poppy onto him." She felt relief flood her.

"I will tell him that you want to see him as soon as he is done." Minerva smiled widely.

"Wait." Hermione sat back on her heels as the second knock came to the door.

"Hermione!" Severus' voice preceded yet another knock.

"Never mind Minerva," Hermione said happily. "He's here! He came to see me!"

She jumped up and ran to the door, taking a deep breath before opening the door and admitting the dour Professor to her apartment.


	22. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 22**

* * *

Minerva frowned at the floo. If he were with Hermione, she would need a replacement to take his next lesson. Looking at the clock, she saw that she only had a few minutes to convince Poppy that it would do the Sixth Years good to review a simple healing potion. Smiling she stepped into the floo and called out the hospital wing as her destination.

She brushed off her robes, irritated to start the day with soot clinging to her hem and stood up surveying the wing, looking for Poppy. Suddenly her hand went to her throat and her knees felt weak.

"Severus," she gasped. "My gods, if you are here… Hermione!"

Severus scowled at her as he hurried to assist her to a chair seeing her reach out to the mantle for support.

"Minerva? he gently pulled her to him, bearing her weight to a nearby bed. "Sit here. Now tell me calmly. What is wrong?"

He looked over his shoulder to find Poppy and motioned her over to them, thinking Minerva ill.

"It's not me, my god, Severus, hurry to her. She thinks it was you at her door."

"She...Hermione?" He grabbed her shoulders and looked into her face. "How long ago?"

"Three minutes, maybe four. She flooed to talk to you and then told me you were at the door," Minerva's voice shook. "Hurry, Severus, Merlin only knows who is really there."

Severus was already pulling out his wand as he stepped into the floo.

.

.

.

Hermione closed the door behind him and turned back, leaning her back against the rough wood. _It is now or never_, she thought. _I have to do this_.

"My sweet," he said, his eyes washing over her. "Muggle clothes? Wherever did you think you were going?"

"Umm," Hermione stammered for words, frowning she found his comment odd, and unlike him.

He stepped close to her, reaching out with both hands and pushed her hair behind her ears.

"I liked it long," he said huskily.

She did not understand, he had told her he liked it better short. She looked up at him as he leaned one hand against the door and moved closer, sliding one of his legs between hers.

"Severus, we need to talk," she said weakly, fearful of him for the first time since the final battle.

"We can talk later," he raised his knee, pushing it into her as his mouth came down on hers, his free hand stroking her hip then sliding lower. He stooped down and grabbed one leg behind her knee, raising it to his hip as he pushed harder.

She struggled against him. Bringing up her hands and trying to push him away. His lips were cold, his taste wrong, and his hands held none of the gentleness that she had known before. She knew this was not her Severus and with that realization, she tasted bile in the back of her throat.

"Who are you? Get out of here!" She fought against him twisting her head to the side.

"We can discuss me later," he smirked. "Here or the bedroom? It matters not to me."

Hermione jammed the heel of her hand into his philstrum, just where it met his nostrils, and pushed up as hard as she could even after she heard a sickening crunch. He wrenched his head back in pain pushing her leg down from his hip and then grabbed his bloodied nose. She stumbled for only a moment, regained her balance and stomped on his instep, digging in her heel.

"Fucker," was all that came out of her mouth before she delivered a well-placed kick to his groin.

Ahhhhggg," he moaned as he grabbed himself and fell to his knees.

She hurried to where her wand lay on the floor by the floo and picked it up, turning to point it at him.

"Accio wand." She raised her left hand waiting for the familiar slap of wood against her palm. "Now talk you bastard. Who the fuck are you?"

"How 'are 'ou!" he wheezed out between gasps of pain, still doubled over on the floor, his nose spewing blood over his mouth and down his chin.

"Easy," she walked around to his front and pointed the wand to the place he held cupped in both hands. "You want to keep them?"

She flicked her wand and grinned. "How about the other one?"

They both looked toward the fireplace as Severus stepped through. His wand was readied in his hand and there was a dark thunderous look on his face.

"Do 'ou know wha' 'our wife 'id?" Severus on the floor cried.

"I can only hope," Severus quipped. "Hermione, return to Hogwarts. I have something to do here."

She ran to him, throwing her arms around his neck and sobbed into his chest.

"It's an ac'," came from the one on the floor who was trying to pull his waistband out, looking down to see if one was really gone. "She's evil. Oh my 'ods! Loo what she's 'on!"

"There are some things I will not do even for friendship," Severus bit the inside of his cheek to keep from chortling seeing Lucius peer into his trousers, his nose broken and blood dripping from his chin to the inside of his clothing.

"Ma'e her pu' it ba'k. I nee' dem both," he looked up and swallowed hard.

Severus raised an eyebrow and felt his lip twitched again. "Hermione?"

"You don't think I went to all those rape classes just to feel good about myself did you?"

Severus lost the battle and allowed an uncharacteristic laugh to fill the room. He used his left arm to hug her and turned his face just enough to kiss the top of her head, not taking his eyes or wand off the suddenly changing wizard in front of him.

"Go now."

She released her hold around his neck and stepped into the floo as Severus stepped between her and the man still on the floor. As the green flames came to carry her away, she caught sight of silver-blond hair replacing the black.

Severus lowered his wand and walked over to Lucius. He extended a hand down to the man and pulled him to his feet.

"You know I don't share Lucius. She was told the same thing." He begrudgingly flicked his wand to fix Lucius' nose enough to let him talk.

"Good gods man, that thing should be kept in a cage. Do you know what she did?"

"I am sure there is a reversal spell. It may take some time but I will get it out of her. You should have known better than to come here."

"I just wanted a little diversion before the revel tonight," he said as he pinched his nose and held his head back to stop the bleeding. "I think she took my wand."

"You are lucky that is the only _wand_ she took," Severus shook his head trying to regain his composure. "One more night Lucius, just one more night, could you just this once wait?"

"Bring her."

"No, I told you I do not share her. She is mine and mine she will remain. If you touch her again I will kill you." He scowled looking intently at Lucius, having a hard time not laughing. "However, if things go well for you tonight I will return your little party favour. The squib you took from Hogsmeade is still with me."

Lucius hobbled to the floo rubbing his crotch with one hand and pinching his nose with the other. "Everyone will be there. Just like in the old days."

"Sans nads," Severus muttered under his breath then smirked at the way Lucius stared at him. "I said Masks, sans masks of course."

Lucius shot him a contemptuous look as the floo carried him away.

"Bastard," Severus said, looking at the empty floo then grinned and shook his head as he followed Hermione to Hogwarts knowing that if push ever came to shove he had best be ready. She was not only a smart witch but a dangerous one as well.

He would have killed Lucius if not for the chance of catching everyone in one place tonight. The revel was being held at the Malfoy Manor. The elves were to travel to Hogwarts at the first sign of trouble and to bring any prisoners with them. Draco promised them freedom for their help, and they had accepted in Dobby's name. Only the promise of working at Hogwarts, as had the brave elf before them had, made them agree.

Severus closed his eyes and took a deep breath of relief before stepping out of the floo. The images he had imagined still haunted him. What could have happened to her, how Lucius could have left her, how broken she could have been. It was his fault for letting her leave him, for not insisting she stay just a few days more. He should have played to that damnable Mrs Giles one more time. He knew, without a doubt that he would send her away if he had to, but he hoped she would not go.

He arrived back at the infirmary to find Hermione sitting with Ellen, calmly discussing Muggle studies. She had convinced Minerva and Ellen that the idea had merit. It was only six days until the end of term. Only Severus knew she was only one day away from safety.

Hermione looked up as Severus walked over to them still smirking. "Excuse me, Miss Johnson. Mrs Snape, may I have a word with you?"

"Or course. Ellen, if you have any problems with the other students you just go to the Headmistress."

Ellen nodded. "Professor Snape?"

"Miss Johnson?"

"My Mum once read about you in the Prophet. It said you were mean and that we shouldn't trust you even after what you did during the war helped our side. But I just wanted to let you know that the way you acted at Malfoy's was wicked."

"You have me confused with someone else," he looked pointedly at Hermione.

"She doesn't mean wicked that way, she means wicked as in good," Hermione jumped in to explain seeing Severus' face grow dark.

"Miss Johnson. Do you attend a Muggle school?"

"Yes, sir."

"Here or on the continent?"

"Umm, here sir?"

"I will suggest to your parents that you begin home schooling. Perhaps you will learn the language that way. Your Muggle school obviously is taught in French."

"He is joking," Hermione glared at him.

"Yeah, I kn…" she started. "Yes, I am aware of that, Mrs. Snape."

"Better." Severus raised an eyebrow at her. "In your free time I will have Mrs. Snape give you some lessons in Muggle defence tactics. She appears quite good at it."

"Muggle tactics?"

"Severus!" Hermione turned red.

"I did not mean the spell Hermione. However, I found that most interesting. Mrs. Weasley has used it as a threat for years. I was not fully aware that such a spell existed." He bit the inside of his lower lip to stop his laughter. "No, she needs to know the other techniques you used, before the wand came into play. It appears they were most effective."

Hermione looked at Ellen and smiled. "Later, now I want to talk to Professor Snape."

She slipped her hand into the crook of his arm and walked outside to the grounds with him. Seeing too many students milling around the path they started to the lake, silently walking together, each trying to think of a way to broach the topic that was in front of them.

"Severus?" she was the first to speak. "I wanted to tell you something. What you do with it is up to you."

He pointed to a boulder, hidden from the view of the castle by larger ones that surrounded it. Nodding she walked over and sat down, patting the cold stone next to her.

"Severus, I wanted to tell you that I don't mind being here with you." She rolled her eyes at her feeble attempt. "What I mean to say is that I will stay if you want. No, I wanted to say that I would stay even if you don't like me."

_Damn_, she thought, _this is not going right_. "Severus? I need to ask you if you …do you care for me at all?"

"You need to stay in tonight. I am closing the floo to the apartment…," he said ignoring what she was saying.

"What? Severus, please. Before this happened I planned to come back to talk to you. I still want to have this conversation."

"Not now Hermione," he slipped down in front of her, reaching up he ran the pad of his thumb over her lips. "Things are happening. Things that will decide our future."

"No, you decide it now," she said quickly and locked her eyes on his. "You don't have to love me back. Not completely. I know that would be asking too much. But, do you care for me at all? Just a little? Just enough to… I don't know… enough to want this to work. To be really married? Sometimes I think you do, and then I think you hate me."

His throat closed making it difficult for him to breathe. He swallowed, trying to clear the obstruction that was building.

"I have never hated you. I have always admired your spirit and your tenacity."

He slipped his hand behind her, rubbing the nape of her neck under her hair. He hesitated, wanting to pull her forward, to feel her against his body, to taste her, to lay her down on the damp ground. He was surprised when her hands came up to either side of his face and she leaned forward to kiss him.

"Hermione," he said softly, pulling away. "I want nothing more than to …"

She waited for him to finish his statement, and when he did not she dropped her hands to her lap. Looking out to the lake, she sighed deeply.

"I guess this is it then. I thought perhaps we could… I thought you could come to love me. I was wrong." She turned and smiled at him feeling her eyes sting. "When we are done with this I think Jennifer would be glad to take you as a husband. You know, the law and all. She is gorgeous and quite smart. You will make a fine couple."

"Hermione, I am twice your age. You saw how your friends reacted to our marriage. Now you are young, you think old friendships do not matter. They do Hermione. They matter more than you know. I don't want you waking up some morning and deciding you made a mistake."

"It was a friend that told me to talk to you. He said that you cared. That why I'm here," she spoke softly, not able to look at him. "Was he wrong? He said that I should not … oh, Severus, none of this matters. Just tell me how you feel."

"Hermione, don't do this. You make it too hard."

"If it is hard then you must feel…"

"Stop," he whispered as he laid his finger on her lips. "I want to take you to my bed. I want you there when I wake up. Is that what you want to hear? Is that what this is about? I cannot live thinking you only want me because you do not want something else you consider worse. Would you still want me if this law did not exist? If you were free would you come to my bed?"

"Would it be so horrible if I did? Would I be that bad of a wife? I wouldn't put demands on you. I could stay in Diagon. I could commute as you suggested. I think I would be a good wife."

"Hermione, stop. Tonight things will change. Let me finish this first, and then we can talk. Not today, not now."

"No Severus, I need to know now. It isn't a hard thing to say. Just yes or no."

"If it goes well we will talk again." He looked at her frowning. "Hermione, you don't understand. Just do this for me. Stay here. Stay in your chambers in the dungeons."

"There will always be that one thing that comes later," she sighed and stood up. "I needed to try. I couldn't just leave without letting you know. I may go to France. The law doesn't extend that far. I won't have the Ministry decide this for me. Goodbye, Severus, and remember that I did love you."

His throat constricted making it difficult for him to talk. He wanted to tell her to stay in his chambers not hers. He wanted to grab her and make her stay.

"You should stay in the castle tonight. We can finish this conversation in the morning. Hermione, do this. This one last thing I ask of you," he managed to choke out.

"There is nothing you can say in the morning that you can't say now," she said, wiping her face with the back of her hand.

"Hermione, this one last thing. Just stay the night. Stay where I know you will be safe, so I know where you are."

"No Severus. I can't do this anymore. I cannot keep hoping that you will change, that someday you will wake up and see me as I want you to. It hurts too much."

"Hermione, one …"

"No. Send me the paper work when it comes from the Ministry. I am sure there will be papers to sign." She turned away from him as her tears began.

She left him standing and walked away, unable to look at him any longer. She had told him what she needed to say. Now she needed to leave.


	23. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: Not Mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 23**

* * *

Kingsley had assembled the largest contingency of Aurors ever put together for a simple house arrest. One hundred and twenty wizards and witches accompanied him on this mission. As he saw it, this was truly the end of the war and he was not taking any chances. He positioned some of them in the Manor, hidden away by Draco, many around the perimeter, and the rest ready to storm the entrance when the time came.

Severus gave him the information, extracting his pound of flesh in exchange. It was not easy to get the approval he had sought. Kingsley had fought hard for the agreement. Severus and his wife would now be allowed to be exempt from the marriage law in the event an annulment was granted. He had also secured them a three-year reprisal from inspections and the overthrowing of their marriage.

Severus had insisted on a widow's pension for Hermione if he should fall in this final battle, regardless of which side threw the curse. The last time he fought between the two sides he found himself in a precarious position, barely surviving, and he saw no difference now. He put the signed agreement in his office desk. He addressed the envelope that held it to Minerva, knowing she would fight to make them honour his last wishes.

Draco led forty-two of the Aurors to the dungeons, showing them where to wait out of sight, to be in line to cut off the entrances that they needed to watch closely. Draco and Severus spent hours spelling all the floos to recognize a specific spell put on the main fireplace in the sitting room. When it was time, Severus would bring down the floo, in effect shutting of all hopes of escape and at the same time, sending a shaft of light up the chimney to call in the Aurors.

"I trust Father is still getting ready?" Draco said as he strode into the sitting room tossing his outer robes on a chair. "Mother will arrive late. Fifteen minutes to be exact. Once she is here, rest assured everyone is inside. She plans on making an entrance."

"You don't have to be here," Severus said as he scowled at him. "It may be better if you were not."

"No, I need to do this."

Draco walked over to the liquor cabinet and began to pour a drink only to put the bottle down. He put both palms on the wooden surface and leaned his weight on his arms, letting his head hang between them.

"Son," Severus walked up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder. "No one will think less of you if you leave."

"I don't care about him. I could cast the killing curse on him myself and not feel a thing," Draco looked up at him as openly as he had as a child. "I don't think I can hex her, what if I hesitate?"

"Leave. Narcissa is no longer your mother Draco. Remember, what you see is not her. She died a long time ago. She is only madness now. Perhaps there is something inherited by all the Black women. She is madder now than Bella was at the last battle."

"I have to do this. Maybe I can get her to go without a fight."

"Kingsley will not injure her if he can help it. The Aurors are under orders to take them as captives, not kill them."

"Have you figured out who is with my father yet?" Draco stood and reached for the bottle again squaring his shoulders in an attempt to cast of his youthful admission.

"No, Kingsley suspects Gibbons or Hayes," he ran his hand through his hair, "it could be both."

"I saw Hermione today, before coming here. I mistakenly thought I would find you with her. I was not aware she had left you again."

"So it would seem." Severus looked at him oddly.

"She is packing. Whatever you said to her must have been absolutely the wrong thing."

"Not now, Draco." He looked at his godson darkly. "It is not your concern. She made her decision."

"You forget what she did for me," he said then knocked back his drink. "And you seem to be oblivious to her feelings."

"Draco, I am warning you."

"With what? That you will kill my parents?" Draco laughed. "No, I think you need to hear this."

"Leave it."

"Fine. Then let's talk about Lily."

"Draco," Severus hissed.

"Did you love her or were you in love with the idea?" Draco refilled his glass. "You were what? Seventeen? Eighteen? Younger than I am now?"

"I knew her before I came to this world."

"Then you were friends."

"I was responsible for her death," he spat.

"But did you love her? I mean really love her? Not as a child, but as a man?"

Severus glared at him, not even wanting to admit the truth to himself. She had been a friend, someone he had fantasies about as any teenage boy would. But love? He had often dreamed that he loved her more than he had. Over the years, he had replaced his feelings of guilt with those of love, and dreamed she was alive to stop his constant self-depravation.

"I don't know." He grabbed the bottle from Draco and threw it into floo. "I think you have had enough of this."

"Do you love your wife?"

Severus locked his eyes on the boy that stood in front of him, seeing him as a man for the first time. He was tall, as tall as he was, thin and agile. They were a study in contrasts. His hair black, Draco's blonde, his eyes dark, Draco's light and transparent. He looked into Draco's face and for the first time in his life had a premonition of complete doom, seeing Draco's features cloud.

"Draco, I want you to leave. I want you to find Hermione and stay with her," he spoke with a hollow tone in his voice, unable to say aloud what he feared.

"I am in this now," Draco said evenly. "It's me and you this time."

"No, Draco leave, before…"

"Ah, so my oldest friend and my son are here together. How touching." Lucius walked in waving his silver-headed walking stick in front of him.

"Where are these minions you claim to control?" Severus sneered, casting a last glance at Draco, knowing the time for him to leave was past.

"They will begin to apparate outside shortly."

"Where is Narcissa?" Severus crossed to what he considered his chair, sitting down stiffly.

"She will be here. You seem worried Severus." Lucius narrowed his eyes at him.

"I am worried that you will prove useless, as useless as your bits," Severus snorted.

"That bitch will pay for this. I do not give a damn if she is yours. Get yourself another whore." Lucius reached for his crotch and adjusted himself again.

Draco looked at his father then back at Severus, not understanding what had passed between them.

"Draco," Severus said hearing the sound of apparation come from the front of the manor, "go outside and welcome your guests. Wait there to insure they all arrive."

"We have an elf for that." The blonde looked at him evenly. "I think I will just wait here with you."

Severus thought furiously for a way to get him out of the room. The young wizard had no idea how bad this could be. He had only been in one battle. One fought in an area large enough to vie of position, circle your opponent, roll away from hexes and make sure that someone was not between you and your target.

"Welcome!" Lucius walked to the door of the sitting room greeting his supporters. Severus leaned his head back watching Draco who nervously looked through the door to the stairs that curved out of sight, looking for Narcissa.

"Draco," he said softly. "Stand… at the back. Against the wall."

"Worried?"

Severus sneered at him then stood and went to the liquor cabinet to pour drinks. He hoped to get enough poured down their throats to impair their aim.

"Severus, sit. Let the elf do that," Lucius ordered him away from the cabinet and clapped his hands, calling an elf.

"I hope you don't mind that I brought entertainment." A heavyset wizard pushed two girls into the room ahead of him. "I just picked them up. Do you believe they were riding bicycles like a Muggle would?"

Severus looked at the girls over the rim of his whiskey glass. They appeared to be no more than twelve. He felt sickened. The elf darted his eyes to the girls and then to Severus.

"You help," the brazen little elf waved the girls closer to him. "No, you stay here and pour. I serves."

Severus nodded at the elf, surprised that the creature would know to position them together. He watched them carefully seeing the liquor splash on the table, as they were unable to stop their hands from trembling when they poured the drinks.

"Come, sit." Lucius swept his arm around the room. "We can begin as soon as my beautiful wife is here."

"Narcissa?" The heavyset wizard laughed. "I thought you were done with her."

"I am," Lucius sniggered. "She will be my donation to the entertainment. She is really quite good, you should try her."

Draco's head snapped up as he looked at his father with a hatred he could not hide.

"Ah, I see that her son takes offence. Draco, you must get over this boy. She left us to bed another. It is not like it will be against her will."

"What will be against my wishes dear?" Narcissa swept into the room and walked directly to Lucius smiling. "Have you begun? Have I missed anything?"

"No." Severus stood with his wand at his side, looking at Draco. "I would say you were right on time."

He flicked his wand at the floo and sent his wordless hex to seal the chimneys and send the signal. He heard a noise in the outer room at once, as did the other wizards in the room who turned to the door to see the Aurors begin to rush the room.

The elf screeched, throwing a tray full of crystal glasses and whiskey in the air as he ran, grabbed the young girls each by a hand, and disappeared from sight.

Lucius seized Narcissa. He yanked her in front on him and placed his wand to her throat. He saw Severus bring his wand down to his side at the same time as the Aurors begin pouring in to the room, and knew that he had betrayed him.

"Let her go," Severus said coldly, extending his arm in Lucius' direction as he ducked to the ground and rolled to avoid a curse.

Lucius glanced at the door and saw Hayes turn away from Severus, feigning innocence, and grinned at the thought that one of his supporters was quick enough to recognize the situation as well. The room became chaotic. Curses hissed and found their mark. Others, deflected by shields, were sent pall-mall around the small room, knocking down the Aurors, and would be Death Eaters alike.

Lucius pushed Narcissa to the floor, pointed his wand at her and shouted a curse as Severus threw a shield around her, stepping between her and Lucius in the hope of offering her some protection. He grimaced as he caught a slicing curse, laying his arm open and making it difficult for him to hold his wand steady.

Draco saw his mother pull her wand and point it at Severus' back and then heard the Avada Kedavra begin to fall. He rushed at Severus, just as his godfather heard the curse and turned to find the source. Draco reached for Severus' shoulders, clutching him, and locking his eyes on those of his godfather as the green light splashed against his back.

Severus watched as Draco's face went from firm resolve to surprised shock, and then saw a gentle smile cross his face.

"Draco! No!" He grabbed the boy's arms and held him up.

"Tell her… Hermione…," he slid to the ground as Severus went down with him. Resting on his knees and pulling his godson to his chest, he buried his face in Draco's still neck as his arms tightened around him.

He no longer heard the battle, or cared to dodge curses. He forgot all but what was in front of him. He pulled his head back to look at the face he had seen a thousand times and remembered when a child's first steps had been to him. He remembered the four year old that would sit on the stairs waiting for him to tuck him into bed and magic a small night light to chase away the badness. He remembered the eight year old he had taught to play chess and the twelve-year-old's grin when he had finally beaten his godfather.

Kingsley turned as he heard the cry in time to see Narcissa crawl away from Severus, and see Lucius' smirk. He hurried to stand over Severus, putting his back to him and gesturing to three other Aurors to take up a guard position as well.

Severus held Draco to his breast and turned his face to the ceiling. He shut his eyes and screamed as his body shuddered in anger. Bringing his head back down, he buried it in the boy's hair and breathed in his scent. A sob escaped him as he gently took two fingers, placed them to the boy's eyelids and slid them down. Then kissing his godson on the forehead he calmly laid down the boy, picked up his wand and went to find Lucius and Narcissa. He would end it now.

He felt cold and empty and knew he would not feel the curse as it left his wand, or as he watched the woman, he once had thought of as a sister fall. He thought of nothing but the duty in front of him. Walking with the fluid grace of a once Death Eater's pride, he now cast his own unforgivable curses without thinking or hearing the scream of death that fell from her mouth.

He came out of his daze standing over Narcissa's body, Kingsley's hand on his arm, pushing it down to his side.

"You need to have that arm looked at," Kingsley said softly, nodding his head to where Lucius' body lay slumped against the wall. "I will clean up here. You need to get out and let me handle this."

Severus pulled his belt out of his trousers and wrapped it around his arm, pulling it tight with his free hand and teeth. He gave Kingsley a dark look then turned on his heel walking back to Draco. He was puzzled at the sight of an Auror placing a portkey on his chest until he realized they intended to take Draco to the Ministry's morgue.

"Get your fucking hands off him," he said contemptuously as he pushed the Auror away with both hands, knocking him roughly to the floor and raising his wand in warning to all least they try to interfere.

He picked up his godson as if he were still a small child, and carried him out of the manor. The Aurors opened a path for him, stepping back and quieting as he passed. He carried Draco far enough from the manor to apparate back to Hogwarts, and took him to his chambers to prepare his body for burial.

First he undressed him and healed what wounds he could, unwilling to have him be seen as he was. He collected a basin of warm water and using several flannels washed the body, and cleansed his hair. He had just begun to rub scented oil onto his cold skin when Minerva brought down his wards and entered his chambers.

"Severus, lad, you only had to ask for help," she looked down at Draco and shook her head sadly. "Such a waste. Such a complete and utter waste."

She stood on the opposite side of Draco's body and helped him as he completed the ritual preparations, dressing him in Severus's finest robes, and ending by wrapping the still body in a shroud of homespun linen. Throughout the procedure, Severus said not a word, nor showed any emotion. He tore the end of the shroud to make bindings, he wrapped the loose ends firmly around Draco's body, and as he finished with the last knot, he stepped back.

"He needs to lay his last night outside, in the open. Why he believed in the old gods is beyond me. The boy was always a fool," he said flatly.

Hagrid has built a bonfire and promised to sit with him," Minerva turned her eyes to his. "Would you like me to take him?"

"As you wish." Severus turned to walk away just as Minerva hurried to him and clicked her tongue in a scolding fashion. She un-wrapped his arm and cast a healing spell.

"Kingsley said that he…"

"If you are taking him, go." Severus cut her off, and then walked into his bedchamber shutting the door behind him.


	24. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 24**

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Hermione read the Prophet the next morning, sitting at her kitchen table. She laid her arms on the table and lowered her head sobbing for the silver-haired boy that had helped her when she had needed someone so desperately. She combed the stories for details, not finding any. Only that he had saved a hero of the final battle, that both his parents were dead, and that the last of the Death Eaters were finally in custody.

There was an inquest, late at night, attended by Kingsley Shacklebolt, to find out why the killing curse had been used. The Ministry had issued stern warnings that the Death Eaters were not to be killed. This was to be a house arrest, an investigation, not a war, they had insisted. As the Malfoys all lay dead, it was obvious that the warnings had gone unheeded. The inquest was fast and swift. They proclaimed that there was not enough evidence against one Severus Snape to bring him to trial. They did not say he was innocent, only that there was not enough evidence.

Hermione lifted her head and looked at the clock. The Daily Prophet stated that services for Draco started at noon. She wiped her eyes and rose to dress not wanting to do this, but unable not to.

It was overcast that day. Cold, with misty rain from a flat grey sky that hung too low to the ground. _It is as if the weather is staging his funeral, _she thought_._ She walked across the grounds slowly to the small cluster around the open grave that lay within sight of the white marble tomb that belonged to Albus.

Minerva stood stiffly with her arm around Pansy Parkinson's shoulders. Hermione was surprised to see her old schoolmate. She knew that Draco had not been overly kind to her in the last few years. Two other men with the same silver blonde hair stood back behind the others, obviously Malfoys. They were talking together, laughing and joking, not in the least concerned at what was in front of them.

Hermione made her way to stand by the grave opposite Minerva, to look at the bronze casket that lay on the ground. She felt the tears that ran down her face and did not bother to wipe them away.

"Hermione?" she looked up as Minerva said her name. "Thank you for coming. He has so few here."

"Is he coming?"

"I don't think he can child." Minerva touched her eyes with a handkerchief. "I don't think he can."

"Is there someone here to speak for him?" Hermione looked down at the cold grave. "I don't know his ways, I've only ever been to a couple of … only the Headmaster and Fred. I couldn't go to the rest… it … it hurt too much."

"I do," Pansy stepped forward and sneered at Hermione. "That's why I am here. No-one else will do it."

Hermione looked up at her blankly.

"I didn't say it was right," Pansy defended herself. "I loved him you know. He was always there. If I needed him, I knew all I had to do was send an owl. He acted tough, but…"

"I know," Hermione whispered and looked back down at the casket.

"Well, I guess it is just us," Pansy walked to the head of the grave and began to raise both arms to the sky when she heard the sound of thunder and looked up as if expecting rain.

The sound of apparition came again. They turned to see Kingsley followed by several more cracks and thunderclaps as the Aurors flooded in to surround the grave, grouped by uniforms, in a rainbow of colours, loudly proclaiming their arrival.

"If you do not mind," Kingsley took Pansy's hand. "It would be my honour to lead the old prayers. He has no family. If you would be so good as to stand at the foot of the grave and give the witches responses, I am sure no one else here will know them."

Pansy nodded curtly and spun to take her position, shooting Hermione a look of contempt as she went.

Hermione felt a hand on her shoulder and turned around to see Arthur Weasley.

"Mr. Weasley," she cried hugging him, resting her cheek on his chest as his arms circled her in an embrace.

"What? When did it stop being Dad?" he said softly. "We are so sorry Hermione. I know what he did for you. Ronald and Lavender will be her shortly, as will Harry and Ginny."

"Thank you," she looked up at him. "He deserves this."

"Molly is cooking up a storm. She said she will not be here, but she has George helping her put up enough to serve the whole lot. You know how she is. Her way to grieve is to cook and make sure everyone eats. At least we can have a proper send off for him."

Hermione nodded and turned back to listen as Kingsley began the traditional prayers that wizards had said since before the memory of man. Pansy mimicked Kingsley's stance, raising her arms, palms open to the sky. She chanted after Kingsley, Hermione detecting subtle differences in her words.

She had a hard time concentrating on what was being said, and let her mind wander over her memories. Eventually she felt a hand slip into each of hers and looked to her left where Ginny stood with her head down and eyes closed saying the prayer along with Pansy, following Kingsley's prompts.

On her other side, stood Harry, looking straight ahead with his face set in a cold mask. She knew he was hiding how close he was to his own tears. Harry was never able to hide his emotions, although he now felt he would be strong for her.

The three stood together until Kingsley took up his wand and lowered the casket into the ground. Together Harry and Ronald stepped forward, took out shovels, magically enlarging them, and began to fill the grave by hand.

Hermione turned back and buried her face in Arthur's chest, unable to watch. She cupped her hands over her ears to shelter them from the sound of the earth falling on the coffin.

"It's okay Hermione. He has just moved to the other side of the veil. Like Sirius did. He is not really gone from us."

"But Mr.…."

He put his finger to his lips to signal her silence. "It is our way and our belief. You are Muggle born and have only been to Dumbledore's funeral. The rest were only memorial services."

"I will get you a translation of the prayer," Ginny offered. "It may make you feel better to read it."

"Does Severus… I …"

"I am afraid that even after all this time he still takes death as a Muggle." Arthur looked behind her to the grave. "Our beliefs in such things are set early in life. You need to talk to him Hermione. He thinks this is his fault."

"Were you there when it happened?"

Arthur nodded his head and put his fingers under her chin. "I don't know what is going on with you two, but if you care for him go to him. Draco was his only true family. He is the only one I ever remember Severus showing any kindness to. Hermione, I have known the man for half my life and have never seen him like this."

She pulled back and looked up at the castle, worrying her lip and thinking about what he said.

"I guess I may as well, the worse he can do it to tell me to leave again." She tried to smile and failed in the attempt.

"Severus?" she peeked into his chamber and saw him sitting in his chair. His long legs stretched out in front of him. .

"What?" he spat.

"I thought you would come to the funeral."

"You thought wrong." He took a long drink of what Hermione knew was his whiskey.

"Kingsley was there, he gave the prayers and…"

"If I gave a fuck I would have gone."

"You're drunk."

"How observant."

"Severus, please don't be like this. Not today."

"Like what?" He stood up smashing his glass in the fireplace.

"Never mind, I just came to see if there was anything you needed."

"Yeah, I need a fuck. Are you available?" He laughed at her shocked expression. "I take it that's a no."

"I see this isn't a good time to talk to you," she said flatly and turned to leave.

"We have a reprieve. Three years. So, little Miss don't- fuck-me-if-you-don't-love-me, you have three years to find someone you do want to fuck and give up your old-fashioned ideas of love and marriage. After that, you are free to go. No marriage law can touch you."

"Why are you doing this?" she hissed at him. "Why do you turn everything ugly?"

"Because it is, my dear. Because it is." He lurched back to his chair, sitting down heavily and picking up the bottle from the floor.

"It isn't. You cheapen what he did, how he died. He did this for you!"

"Get the fuck out of here!" he thundered. "I didn't ask him to do it, I didn't ask him to die. No more than I asked you to marry me. Now get out!"

She sucked in her breath at the anger she felt radiating from him. "You bastard! Why do you think he did what he did?"

He stood up and strode over to her, grabbing her hair and pulling her close. Laying his forehead on hers, he weaved, having trouble staying upright.

"He did it because he was young and stupid, just as you are. This is what I am. Do you still want me?" He smirked at her, and took her hand forcing her to feel his hardness through his trousers. "I won't do gentle Hermione, the time for that is past. So tell me, do you still love me?"

"Bastard," she spat at him and pulled away.

"That is what I've been telling you." He shoved her back and made it back to his chair.

"Leave me," he sneered. "I am tired and plan on getting drunker."

"I think you have had enough." She turned for the door.

"I've had enough of witches," he chuckled. "Enough of needy witches and foolish boys. I am done trying to protect the world. It can all go to hell for all I care and you with it."

"And I have had enough of your moods and …"

"Get out!" he thundered as his bottle went sailing past her head, narrowly missing her.

He watched as she ran out of the room and leaned back in his chair, reaching his arm down the side of the chair to the floor where his glass stood. _Fuck her, _he thought. _Fuck her to hell_.

He had brought Draco back, needing her with him, needing her to help him bury his godson. He had wanted her near him, waiting for him. She had left. Left after he had begged her for one more night, just once to wait for him to talk in the morning. He had never asked her to stay with him before, only this once and she refused.

He pulled himself up and opened the passage to her quarters, pulling out his wand and crossing into her half of the combined quarters. He saw that she had left her books and journals in her study that still hung heavy with her smell. He flicked his wand, uttered a transfiguration charm that turned the books to butterflies and then opened the door to the hallway, chuckling as they flew away.

He destroyed the bookcases and desk, sending the broken wood to the fireplace and setting it aflame. He continued into her bedroom, saw an orange cat stretch lazily on the bed, and then hiss at him before jumping down to scamper to the hall. He raised his wand and pointed at the half kneazle, sneering when he thought how fitting it was that even her familiar would snarl before leaving him.

He looked at her bed and raised his wand, hesitated for a moment, then sent the entire bed as he had the bookcases. Continuing through the rooms he drunkenly laughed, turning her Muggle clothing to ash, smashing her picture frames and sending her furniture to the fire.

He returned to his chair and finished another bottle, then he fell asleep to the sound of her voice, as it scolded him in his dreams. He saw her eyes as they had filled with tears, and woke calling her name.


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

* * *

**This chapter is M rated. I am sorry for any miffed feelings over this. However, the characters demanded it. I think it is a soft M, but an M. I planned on keeping to the T but the characters are scowling at me, telling me this is important.**

* * *

**Finding Home**

**Chapter 25**

* * *

Hermione worked at the Ministry for just under three years before she was able to look forward to her impending promotion. She was unsure if this was what she wanted, and knew that if she accepted it she would be cutting off her options to change departments.

She had left Hogwarts, and later Diagon Alley, after Draco's death. She was unable to come to terms with not only Severus' refusal to see her, but her own inability to live where he was a constant reminder.

Now, she sat at her desk in the London walk-up and studied the offer in front of her, raising her head when she heard a knock at the door. She sighed and walked across the small sitting room thinking that Ginny had come again with her now three children and dreaded the thought of trying to appear happy to hear her stories of motherhood.

When she opened the door she was surprised to see Severus standing there looking down at her. She self-consciously raised her hand to her hair and pushed it back to smooth it away from her face.

"So, I take it our three years are up." She stepped aside to let him in, not meeting his eyes.

"Yes," he shrugged off his wet robes and hung them on the hook by the door, "I did not have time to bring the papers earlier."

"Really? I must say I am not surprised to see you. I thought you were retired, or living off your Ministry war pension. Minerva said you quit teaching a year ago."

"I have started a small business. It takes most of my time," he said stiffly as he reached in his pocket and brought out a small scroll.

She took the parchment from him and carried it over to the window where she could read it by the fading sunlight. She turned it over to look at the back, as if something more were printed there that would explain what she was looking for, before turning back to him.

"I saw nothing in the Daily Prophet, nor did I get a notice from the Ministry."

"I can assure you it is in order."

"I'm sure it is." She looked at him, at last locking her eyes on his until he looked away under her gaze. Sighing, she padded barefoot to the desk and sat down heavily as she reached for her quill.

"It seems strange, to sign this I mean." She looked down at the parchment turning her back to him to hide her face. "Does it matter who signs first?"

"It does not matter as long as it is signed in the presence of each other. The document is…"

"Yes, I know. All the documents here are magical." She poised her quill over the document and touched the tip to the line above her printed name. "There was a time I thought that… I guess it doesn't matter now."

"Finish. You thought what?"

"Until that day that I brought you that book and saw Jennifer in your chambers, I thought perhaps we could… you know, that we could actually make a go of this. It was a foolish idea. I was too young to understand I guess."

"I told you that she was only with me to gather information on her sister." He stepped closer to her as he peered over her shoulder to see her hand shake. "There was never anything more than a business arrangement between her and me. I did not sleep with her, Hermione. Not then, and not since."

"It wouldn't matter. You have every right to sleep with whomever you please. If I remember correctly you balked at the wedding, refusing the normal vows." She lifted her quill and made the first slash of the H in her name before laying the quill down. "I think you should sign first, your name shows at the top as the primary petitioner."

"Hermione, you need to do this."

"Or course I do. I want you to do it first. Just on the off chance that it makes a difference." She turned and looked up at him, holding the quill out to him. "Please, just do this one last thing for me, then you never have to see me again."

He took the quill and walked to her side turning the document toward him. Lowering his hand to sign he heard her sharp intake of breath and turned to see her staring at his hand with tears forming in her eyes.

"Hermione?" He looked at her strangely. "I thought you would be relieved to know our time is over. Now you can truly be free. It has been long enough."

"Of course I am happy." She smiled thinly although her chin trembled. "After all, I have wasted eight years of my life on this. It's time to move on. I still find it strange that after all this time all we have to do is sign a paper."

"We thought it would not last more than a few months," he frowned at her. "Tell me Hermione, when you walked into Minerva's office that day, what had you come for? I always wondered about that. I know it was not for a lesson plan."

She stood and walked to the window looking out at the darkening streets. "Just sign the thing. I was a child, a stupid ignorant child when all this started. I can't remember why I went to see Minerva. At the time…why would it matter now? Just sign the damned thing."

He crossed the room to her and took her by her upper arms turning her towards him, and then lifted her chin until she looked at him.

"Tell me," he whispered to her. "I need to know. To put this behind me, I need to know."

"You need a lot don't you? Eight years of my life isn't enough for you? I told you once how I felt and you chose to disregard it," she twisted away from him.

He reached in his pocket and brought out the ruling he had received from the Ministry and shoved it in her hands.

"Read this. You won't quit until you do." He lowered his eyes and turned away as he heard her unroll the parchment.

She read slowly, seeing it written in a hand she did not recognize and carrying the seal of the Ministry.

.

.

Mrs Snape;

Your husband, by virtue of an agreement reached prior to his assistance in a matter of some importance, is hereby granted the right to seek an annulment of his marital vows.

He has made a case against you retaining the position of his wife. In as much as he finds he is unable to consummate the marriage, due your past indiscretions, he is now granted this petition.

As we still hold all Wizarding marriages to be unbreakable, this special request is in no way to be considered a precedent.

Ministry of Magic

Registrations and Rule Division

.

.

He waited until he knew that she'd had enough time to read it before turning back. She had slid to her knees and clutched the paper to her chest as tears flowed down her cheeks.

"You did this? The law was not repealed? You bargained before going to Malfoy that night? You bargained with Kingsley? You told him you didn't want to …?" She looked up at him, her eyes large and full. "I thought… I used to think…I know what Ronald thought… I used to think you saw me differently, that it didn't matter."

"Merlin, no." He squatted in front of her and pulled her into his arms. "I promised you at the beginning that I would not touch you. I promised you, do you remember?"

"I was young, and when Ronald… when he… sign it Severus, just do it and go."

"Hermione! I just led him to believe it was what I thought to gain your freedom. It was all I had to bargain with. I wanted to do this for you, to give this to you."

"For me? I never wanted you to push me away. I never wanted to leave. I wouldn't have minded, I mean if you wanted to … I told you that once. I told you how I felt, but you didn't want to do anything about it."

He smirked at her and allowed a chuckle to fill him. "I think it is a little late for regrets over what was not done. Don't you?"

She nodded at him and lowered her head. "I told you once I would try to be a wife. At the beginning I was scared, I know I couldn't have done it then, not with anyone, but now…"

"Have you been with anyone else?" He held her chin not letting her look away.

"Only when Mal…"

"No!" He scowled and shook his head. "That was not love, or even sex. That was power and control. That had nothing to do with what we could have between us. I told you that once before."

"Us?" She reached a finger and traced his mouth. "Did you ever want to? I mean, I just want to know. I know it's too late now."

"Is there someone else? Someone you truly love? Someone you think you could?" He locked his eyes on hers and waited for her answer. "It's been three years Hermione, have you met someone?"

"I thought you understood." She looked at him then squeezed her eyes shut. "You. I told you that day by the lake. Only you."

"Hermione?" He sighed and shook his head, then stood up and began to pace, unable to trust what he was hearing, and not sure he should say what was in his mind. "If this is real, if this is what you want, then you need to know that it is forever."

"If you don't believe me sign the bloody paper, Severus." She hugged her arms around her waist and lowered her head. "Just don't tell me what I feel is not real, or that you are too old, or that I am too young, or you are too much of a bastard. You are you know. A _perfect_ bastard. It is the one thing you have always been good at."

Severus looked at the ceiling, took a deep breath, lowered himself to the floor, pulled her onto his lap and began to chuckle. "Gods girl, why the bloody hell did we waste so much time?"

"Because you're an arse." She bit her lip and looked up at him. "With a little practice you could be perfect at that too. You could be perfect at both, being an arse and a bastard."

"I couldn't do this then Hermione, I don't know if you can understand that, but I needed to get past it all, past all the…" he was uncharacteristically at a loss for words.

"Past Voldemort and then Draco?" she asked softly, fisting her hands to keep from reaching for him.

"In a way." He pulled her closer and buried his face in her hair. "I needed to get past the hate. Past the need to hurt someone and afraid that you would be there when it happened. I would have hurt you, I know myself too well to think differently. "

"And now?" she pulled back and looked up at him.

"Ask me again if I care for you and I will say no. I will say I love you and have done so ever since you walked into the kitchen with your hair wet wearing that shirt." He raised an eyebrow as she reddened.

"So, what do we do now?" she asked.

"We either sign the paper, or give this a try."

"A try?"

"A try," he smirked, "if it does not work the first time I am willing to keep trying until we get it perfect. I may have to practice with you every day, morning and night, maybe an afternoon study session as well."

"Practice what? " She turned scarlet as she saw his smirk and understood his meaning. "Arse."

"I bought a small house near Hogsmeade. Nothing grand, but large enough to study this in."

"Are you asking me something or just giving me information," she smiled widely.

"I don't ask my wife to live with me," he answered her firmly. "She does so because she wants to, or she signs the paper and I leave."

She began nodding and talking fast. "You can get my belongings that I left at Hogwarts. I can be packed by noon tomorrow. I will…"

"Umm, about that," he sniggered at her. "You have nothing left."

"What do you mean I have nothing left? My books are still there."

"I got a little angry. Angry with you." He looked down at her and raised his eyebrow. "Well, think of it this way. If you had come to my bed none of this would have happened."

"If you had taken me to your…"

"No, before you come home, and it will be your home, you have to understand what I was thinking that night you were not…"

"Oh, my gods," she pushed away from his chest and sat up, "you destroyed everything?"

"Not everything," he snorted. "I let that damnable cat live."

"Everything?" She felt her lip twitch.

"Except the cat."

"The cat."

"Yes."

"Severus?"

"What?"

"That's not my cat."

"What?"

"Crookshanks died years ago."

"Why…?"

"It was Draco. I had to have an excuse for when I was buying two books at a time, and when I moved into the dungeons it just followed me in one day. I think it belongs to the Johnson kid that used to be in Ravenclaw."

"Dare I ask why you do these things?"

"What things?" she frowned at him. "Severus, do you have any idea how old my cat would be?"

"Fine, let it go," he smirked. "I just don't understand you half the time."

"I do love you. You do understand that? You are not as dense as I think you are, are you?"

"I know," he nuzzled her neck. "I do however expect some convincing."

"And? Don't you have something to say to me?"

He looked down at her and scowled, "Hermione, I am sitting on the floor allowing you to drench my robes and did not kill your cat. What more proof do you need?"

"Arse," she said and laid her head back on his shoulder. "You do know I am not helping clean up the mess."

"It was the night Draco died." He stopped nuzzling her and sat up a little straighter. "I wanted you there, I wanted this then."

"You never told me."

"If I had died I did not want you to care," he sighed. "If I came back I didn't want you to leave. I wanted you there if I returned and when you weren't it took me a long time to realize it may have been at fault."

"You think? What ever gave you that idea?" She moved until she could see his face more clearly. "Severus? If we do this you…okay, _we_ have to be a little more honest with each other."

"You think?" His lip twitched as he looked down at her and saw her smile at the same time her eyes filled.

"You do know that I will spend the night here." He leaned down to her ear, pulling the lobe gently with his lips. "You do know we will consummate this."

He stood up and reached his hand down to her, pulling her to her feet and into his arms. "Last chance, Hermione. Make sure this is what you want. Make sure you want this to be real and forever. To come home with me and call it your own. You once said you wanted to go home but didn't know where it was. Tell me that I will be your home, that you have found it."

"I have wanted this since I found the owl that was bringing the news to Minerva about the new law. Why did you think I just happened into her office at almost midnight you fool? I figured it would take at the most two years before I could make you love me. So I was off a little."

He pulled her to him and covered her mouth with his as she stood on her tiptoes, wrapping her arms around his neck, bringing up her legs until she had them wrapped around his waist. He ran his hands up her back, under her tee, not releasing her mouth until he was lifting it over her shirt over her head. Reclaiming her mouth, he moaned as he felt her tug to release his shirt from his waistband.

He kissed a line from her mouth to her ear as he undid the clasp of her bra, her head falling back to give him full access to her neck, then fell to his knees, leaning forward until her back was on the floor, and he was kneeling over her. She lowered her feet, releasing him, and watched as he sat back on his heels and raised his arms over his head pulling off his shirt to avoid wasting time on the buttons.

He shuddered when she sat up and kissed her way across his chest, her hands moving to his back, running her fingers in delicate patterns across his skin as he struggled to pull the last of the fabric over his head. He tossed his shirt across the room and turned back to her, pushed her to the floor and slowly pulled down her zipper and undid her waistband.

He moved back, looking at her face to see if her eyes held any fear. Seeing none, he pulled her jeans and knickers down at the same time, falling over her with his legs between hers, his weight on one arm and his other reaching down to undo his belt. He unbuttoned his trousers and lowered his zipper, releasing himself, not able to spare the time to undress.

He pulled his head back to look at her face, seeing that she had closed her eyes and sucked her bottom lip between her teeth. He slowly moved his hand between them, running his fingers along her labia, feeling for the wetness he needed to find. He lowered his head as she turned back to him, and saw her eyes as they locked on his.

"Trust me?" he whispered and saw her nod as she arched her body up to his, needing the contact of skin on skin.

He positioned himself again, resting his forearms on either side of her head. "Hermione, I am sorry," he crushed his mouth to hers, sliding into her, swallowing her gasp, and feeling her arms go around his back as he struggled to hold still.

"Severus," his name fell from her lips as she pushed her head back to the floor, afraid only that he would stop, "Severus, please."

He moved slowly at first, wanting to make her feel what he knew she should, but not able to still his own desire to wait for her. He threw his head back and stiffened as he felt a quickening that signalled his own release. Then lowering his mouth to hers, he completed the consummation.

Feeling like a hormonal teenager he grinned, nuzzling her neck and chuckling. "Gods girl, I haven't come that fast since…" he looked at her sheepishly, knowing not to finish his thought. "I'm sorry Hermione, I couldn't…"

Her hand covered his mouth as she looked into his eyes. "I wanted you to do this. I wanted you to enjoy it. To want me again."

He kissed her hand, grabbing it with his own and moving it to press against his cheek. "I should have waited for you. I should have gone slower."

She began to chuckle at him, "I don't think you could have waited if Dumbledore himself were standing here clicking his tongue and giving instructions. But I do expect more next time."

"I need you Hermione. I need you more than you can imagine." He sighed as he began to roll to her side.

"Then we need to practice again." She reached up and pulled him back, not letting him leave her.

He nipped at her lips until she opened her mouth for him, moving slowly under him, hearing her gasp as his hand moved to her breast.

He snapped his head up suddenly as he frowned. "What did you say?"

"That we need to practice again." She reached for him, wanting to feel his skin against hers and taste his mouth.

"No, before. The last thing before we did this. Something about finding an owl before coming to Minerva's office." He looked down at her suddenly aware that she had fooled him from the very beginning.


	26. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer: Not mine.**

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**Finding Home**

**Epilogue**

* * *

Severus sat in front of the fireplace reading the latest book that compared the different types of Chinese cauldrons and the effects they had on brewing times when he heard a crash come from the kitchen.

"Severus Snape get your arse in here now!"

He sighed as he put down his book and pulled off his glasses to save Hermione from another catastrophe in the kitchen. He stood slowly and smirked as he heard another yowl of anger come from her.

He leaned against the doorframe and folded his arms. "Hermione, I have told you before that she is just not controlling her magic. It is normal."

"Normal?" she asked from her seat on the floor, a bowl of oatmeal running down her face, her chair smashed beneath her and her hair bright green. "This is not normal!"

"You have never been around magical children." He smirked as he pushed off from the wall and picked Elaine up from her highchair, first releasing the ropes that Hermione had magicked to hold her.

"Don't you dare reward her for doing this again." She scrambled to her feet and held her arms out to him. "Give her back Severus."

"Da." Elaine's tiny hand reached out and grabbed Severus' nose. She giggled and squeezed with her thumb hooked firmly into his nostril hard enough to bring tears to his eyes. She then made a perfect O with her mouth and blew enough magic into the air to bring his hair forward, over his face.

"Still think she's cute?" Hermione took her from his outstretched arms.

"Yes," he drawled, making no attempt to push his hair back. "I find her more like her mother each day."

"Prat!" she spat at him.

"Bint!" he smirked as Hermione reached up and pushed his hair back. "Did you find someone to tend her this evening?"

"No, Ginny won't do it. She says Elaine is a bad influence."

"She is only eight months old, how can she be a bad influence?" he asked as his face darkened.

"Even Molly says she is too much to keep up with, and Minerva won't answer the floo any more." Hermione's eyes began to flood. "Am I such a bad mother? Is it something I've done?"

"You mean other than giving birth?"

"Severus, I still know that spell." She angrily pointed at his genitals. "If you value what you have I would suggest not saying what you think all the time."

"She is fine, she is just a little high-spirited," he frowned, as a gob of oatmeal hit his cheek and a gale of laughter came from the dark haired child Hermione had slung on her hip.

"So tell me _Daddy_, any more suggestions?" Hermione glared at him.

"Surely there is someone out there that has not tended her before that we can trick… that we can ask to tend her." Severus frowned at his daughter. "You are sure she is mine, are you not?"

"As I remember it was your constant practicing that did it," she sniggered at him.

"Well, we did get it right. Of course you seem to get it right at least three times before I do these days."

"Severus!" she chided. "Not in front of Elaine."

"What? The act or the talk?"

"So what do you…?" She turned to see an owl tapping at the window.

Severus lifted the window, letting the owl in and unfastening the small missive tied to its leg, unrolling it and smirking.

"The Longbottoms are back in town and want to visit this coming Saturday."

"And, this makes you happy why?"

He looked at Elaine and raised his eyebrow.

"Oh Severus, no, not Luna. My god you can't be serious."

"Are you worried about our delicate little angel or your loony friend?"

"Severus, you never want to go out. Why now? Why is it suddenly so important that we go out tonight?" She pushed Elaine back into the highchair and pulled her wand to repair the chair. Scowling at Severus, she tapped her foot until he sighed and began to clean the oatmeal from the walls and ceiling. She returned to repairing the furniture and cleaning the cupboards and counters.

"You know this lecture is important to the business, Hermione. The wives are all invited. I think it important that you accompany me this time."

"Fine." She worried her lip and looked at Elaine who occupied herself blowing spit bubbles. "I guess Luna could handle her for an hour or so."

"Just make sure she carries her wand and does not turn her back," Severus said seriously as he suddenly thought to check his pocket for his own.

"Poppy said she is still too young to hex. If I just had a few hours at the library with her I bet I could find something."

"Right, when you get ready to take her let me know. I may have to leave the country. They will think the Dark Lord has come back."

"Severus Tobias Snape!"

"She is my daughter. What do you think would happen if you took her someplace she could really damage?"

"I'll floo Luna. Maybe a night out will do us good," she sighed heading for the floo as the tea cups on the table started to spin and Elaine clapped her hands in delight.

Severus glanced over his shoulder, making sure Hermione was out of sight, then crossed quickly to the high chair, leaned over his daughter, and gently guided her hand to stop the teacups.

"Good girl," he beamed and patted her on the head. "Now, see how to move them up."

He helped her curl her fingers, pointing one to the cup and then held her hand as she forced the tiny pointing finger to flex and the cup to rise. He beamed in pride and patted her on the head again, then stood up before catching sight of Hermione standing in the doorway tapping her foot.

"What?" he said sheepishly.

"What do you think?" she hissed. "Honestly Severus, you need to help me out here."

"Did Luna…"

"Don't change the subject. I saw you."

"I was merely showing her how to control herself." He crossed his arms and looked down his nose at her.

"Give it a rest." She shoved him aside and grabbed the teacup from the air, then turned and shook it at Elaine. "Bad Daddy, bad teacup."

Elaine put her head down and shoved her thumb in her mouth, peering up through her eyelashes at Severus.

"Hermione, do you not think that is a little harsh?"

"Harsh my arse, you sit with her all day."

"Did you contact Mrs. Longbottom?" He quickly changed the subject seeing her on the verge of tears.

"Yes, she will be here at six. I just feel so guilty over this."

He crossed over to her and pulled her to him, lifting her chin and kissing her. "Maybe we can put her down for a nap."

"Yeah right, last time we tried that she shattered her window and blew the door off its hinges."

"She stayed in bed," he chuckled as she swatted his arm.

Luna came at six as promised, prepared with a bag of children's books and toys.

"So where is the dear?" she asked after the usual greetings were over.

"Dear?" Severus smirked. "Hermione, why don't you get the little _dear _for her?"

She shot him a disgusted look before retrieving Elaine from her room and carrying her into the sitting room.

"Oh my, Hermione, she is just beautiful. Doesn't look like you at all Professor." Luna smiled dreamily and walked over to Hermione holding out her hands to Elaine.

"Oh my," Luna laughed as a puff of white smoke emitted from the laughing child's mouth. "She has a lot of magic doesn't she? I bet she's a handful."

"Umm, yeah you might say that," Hermione stammered. "Listen, I just need to slip into my dress would it be okay…"

"Sure, it will give us some time to get to know each other." Luna smiled digging into the bag of toys she had brought with her, pulling out two thick furry hand puppets. Sliding them on Elaine's hands, she tightened the wristbands to keep them from falling off.

"Is she always so happy?" Luna tilted her head and smiled at Elaine.

"Mrs. Longbottom, may I ask what those are?" Severus scowled at the pink bunny and purple dragon that now adorned his daughter's hands finding them most unappealing.

"Oh, they used to be mine. Mum said that when I was little I could not control myself so she made me these."

Severus raised his eyebrow and picked up his daughter's hand, looking at the thick heavy padded fabric then back at Luna.

"Dragon's hide." Luna nodded.

"Mrs. Longbottom, I must apologize for anything I previously thought of you."

"Severus?" Hermione walked up to him, peered over his shoulder and then back at Luna. "They work?"

"Oh yes, of course it works better if you refrain from teaching her."

Hermione slapped Severus on the head. "Told you."

"You two just run along now." Luna laughed at Elaine who was shaking her hands and frowning. "We will be just fine."

Severus pulled Hermione over to the floo and pushed her in.

"Hurry," he hissed, "before she learns to take them off."

"You didn't have to be so rude," Hermione said as she brushed off her dress and looked around. "Severus, where are we? You said we were going to the Ministry."

He stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her back into his chest. "This is their new home. They just moved in today."

"Severus?" She pulled against him. "Who?"

"There." He leaned down to her ear and pointed to her parents who stood in the doorway waiting for her. "Go."

"Mum?" she whispered as his arms slipped away from her. "Dad? You… You remember…"

They ran to her and engulfed her in their arms crying and talking at the same time. Hermione hugged her mother so tightly she thought she would never be able to let go until she heard her father sob and turned to throw her arms around him instead.

"Baby," he said, "You are all grown up."

She held his face in her hands, cried, and laughed as she looked at him. "And you are grey and wrinkled and I love you more then you know."

"Hermione!" Her mother wrapped her arms around her waist. "Your Professor says that the war was bad, and that you did this to save us."

"Professor? No Mum, he is…"

"Miss Granger!" Severus stepped forward and gave her a warning look. "They have just returned. Perhaps new information should be given slowly."

"Miss Granger? No, not this time, not about you, I won't lie about you," she stammered and looked at him oddly. "Mum, Severus is my husband. We have really been married for years now, we have a daughter together."

"Him?" Her father turned to look at Severus. "Isn't he the one you always complained about?"

"Dad, don't," she muttered and blushed. "That was a long time ago."

"But, he is old enough to be …" Mrs. Granger started.

"Mum, don't do this," she said as her eyes began to sting. "I told you we have a daughter, we have been married since about a year after you left."

"Hermione." Severus clenched his jaw. "Time has passed differently for them. They are aware of what has happened, but they do not feel the time lapse the same as you. It is as if they are waking from a dream."

"We are right here, don't talk about me as if I am deaf," Mr. Granger said angrily. "Why didn't you tell me about this before Professor?"

"Because of this. I am not surprised by your reaction. I had only hoped that your daughter would be able to visit before this began," he spoke to her father as he watched Hermione's face crumble.

"Dad, please, not now."

Severus saw her eyes fill and turned to the floo.

"Don't you dare run off." Hermione ran to him and grabbed his arm in alarm. "Don't you dare."

"I am not running off my dear," he said with a smirk, then leaned forward and kissed her cheek. "I need to collect something we should have brought."

He flooed home and brought back Elaine, thrusting her at Mr. Granger and looking at him evenly.

"This sir is the rest of my family. A family that you are welcome to join or leave as you see fit. The decision is yours. However, know that you will not take it apart. I have waited too long and fought to hard for it to throw it away."

Hermione's father looked at Elaine's hands and grinned, then looked up at his wife seeing her trying to contain her own smile.

"My God, Hermione, she is just like you. Except the hair of course."

Severus snapped his head to Hermione and smirked, "I told you it was your fault."

Hermione clenched her lips together and glared back at him.

"Quite a handful I bet." Mr. Granger threw his head back and laughed as his wife took Elaine from him.

"Mum?"

"Oh yes, indeed. We didn't know about magic then. We just thought you were possessed."

"I still think that," Severus quipped. "Did you ever have the theory tested?"

"The gloves may work for a while, but she'll learn other ways," Mrs. Granger smiled at Elaine as she hugged the sleepy baby and laid its head on her shoulder. "So when are you due?"

Hermione blanched and looked at Severus, swallowing hard and saw his pallor grow even shallower.

"How did… I mean … I am only… ummm"

"Hermione?" Severus felt his knees weaken thinking of two like Elaine at once.

"I have never seen you wear a dress like that, it is rather unbecoming in the way that it hides your figure," Mrs. Granger laughed. "Is it a maternity or a witch's dress?"

"Severus?" she said weakly, glad when he crossed the distance to her and put his arms around her.

"Maybe this one will be easier." He tried to reassure her but did not know what to say and couldn't believe his own words. He laid his hand on her stomach and smirked. "We really don't need to practice anymore. Of course it may be a little late to stop the morning sessions I find I quite enjoy them."

"Oh good lord you two." Mr. Granger shook his head misunderstanding the type of practice Severus was referring to. "You have help now."

"Help? Sir, I hardly need help." Severus looked hard at him only to feel Hermione punch his arm.

"I should say so, leave this one with Grandma tonight," Mrs. Granger said kissing Elaine's sleeping head as tears filled her eyes.

Severus pulled Hermione to the floo wanting to be alone with her, but knowing she had just reunited with her parents and may want to stay. He was glad to feel her hand slip into his and squeeze firmly. He threw down the floo powder with his free hand, taking his wife home.

"It will be better this time, won't it?" she asked him as they stood in their fireplace at home.

"It is good now Hermione. It is more than I ever thought I would have. It will only be better."

"You don't mind? About the baby, I mean. I wanted to have two close in age, and I was already pregnant when Elaine started to throw things around, then I kept thinking that you…"

He laid his finger on her lips to quiet her. "If you want a dozen we will have a dozen. If you want more we can take them off the streets," he said as he smirked at her. "Just know this is forever, and whoever leaves first takes the kids."

* * *

**Thanks for all the kind reviews during the posting of this story. I hope now that it is complete any new readers will continue to give me their input. Sequel is up. See _Home Again, Home Again, Jiggety Jig_**.


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